U.S. Customs Help

[freeskisquaw]

I'm coming back to the states from Italy tomorrow and a few days ago I bought a bottle of absinthe. Someone told me that I cannot bring it back into the U.S. and I checked on the customs website and they are right...

"The importation of Absinthe and any other liquors or liqueurs that contain Artemisia absinthium is prohibited."

What would be the best way to get this stuff through customs?

[fez]

mail it home to someone you know with no return address.

at least thats what my roommate from college did when he ditched out on his semester abroad in london and got a job working in a hash bar in amsterdam.

we would get a package every now and then from him with hash in it.
sometimes we would get a letter from us customs telling us that our package had been intercepted but we never saw the police over it.

[skiguide]

yeah, you really aren't supposed to bring that back... basically, it can get confiscated, not really sure how much trouble otherwise...

we did, however bring a bottle back from the UK without issue

[BLOOD SWEAT STEEL]

Drink it all and smuggle across the border internally. They won't be able to confiscate it and as a bonus it should make for one hell of a plane ride too.

[strawjack]

i just found a web site that will ship it to the US.

i would just mail it to yourself as well.

let me know how you make out as i'll be in italy next month and will need to do the same.

[edg]

IIRC, not all absinthes contain wormwood extracts (as they cause hallucinations) so you might be OK anyway.

Edit to add : Just shove it up your ass!

edg

[cj001f]

if you have to ask

[freeskisquaw]

Well, as this is my first time illegally smuggling anything over the border, excuse my JONGness. Would it work just putting it in a plastic bottle or taking the labels off of the glass bottles? How hardcore are customs agents, do they open bottles up if they don't have labels on them?

[edg]

Yeah taking the labels off would probably get you chucked in Gitmo. Just pour it into a soda bottle, and store the glass bottle seperately. Other end, transfer it back.

edg

[cj001f]

Well, as this is my first time illegally smuggling anything over the border, excuse my JONGness. Would it work just putting it in a plastic bottle or taking the labels off of the glass bottles? How hardcore are customs agents, do they open bottles up if they don't have labels on them?

Sounds like its your first time across the border period.Hint: They don't fucking care. But for you I suggest transfering it into a plastic bottle and inserting the bottle in your rectum.

[freeskisquaw]

Another dumbass question- Will plastic bottles work? Like a coke bottle or something because its darker. Will they open the plastic bottles if they're in checked luggage?

[Spicoli]

Just use whatever feels best in your ass.

[skiguide]

we honestly just carried it on-i wouldn't risk the breakage in your checked luggage, it leaked a little and that stunk enough... (i personally don't like the shit at all)

as someone said, just act cool, (being all shifty is suspicious) they really aren't likely to check anything, esp. if you are a US citizen returning from vacation.

the only thing i feel semi bad about is blatantly lying that i had alcohol in my bag -but actually, i honestly forgot i had some in there...

[hemas]

Fucki, just bring it in your carry-on luggage... Nobody cares a rats ass... Especially since the carry-on only gets zapped before boarding the plane, not after landing.

[freeskisquaw]

OK, I think I'm just going to pour it into a large 1 litre coke bottle and check it in my luggage with like some dirty clothes packed around it or something.

[CantDog]

When I came back from switzerland and amsterdam, I didnt even get stopped in Logan airports. Seriously, it was more of a hassle getting through security going into Logan than it was leaving customs.

The worst they would do is confiscate it.

And edg is right, I think most of absinthe now is made without the wormwood extract.

we honestly just carried it on-i wouldn't risk the breakage in your checked luggage, it leaked a little and that stunk enough... (i personally don't like the shit at all)

as someone said, just act cool, (being all shifty is suspicious) they really aren't likely to check anything, esp. if you are a US citizen returning from vacation.

the only thing i feel semi bad about is blatantly lying that i had alcohol in my bag -but actually, i honestly forgot i had some in there...

[daPig]

I brought a bottle back from Prague in my checked luggage. Wrapped it in plastic bags and then rolled it up in some jeans etc. to keep from breaking.

[freeskisquaw]

Will they even open up checked luggage ifwe're just returning from vacation?

[slim]

Will they even open up checked luggage ifwe're just returning from vacation?

Yes... but they most likely won't be checking your ass.

[robokill1981]

Will they even open up checked luggage ifwe're just returning from vacation?

Not unless you give them a reason to. Don't stress about. Does the absinthe you have actually have wormwood in it? If not it might not be worth any hassle of bringing it back.

[DJSapp]

Will they even open up checked luggage ifwe're just returning from vacation?

Answer: it depends. Odds are they will not do anything, they'll just wave you through, unless you are the one millionth customer and win a free anal probing. Now here's the best solution:

Step 1. Buy a bottle of similary colored booze (vodka, gin, whatever) from the duty free shop in the airport/liquor store/wherever.

Step 2. Dispose of alchol in whatever manner necessary

Step 3. Refill bottle with contraband and PACK IT IN YOUR CARRY-ON. Carry on placement makes the 'Oh I bought it at the duty free store at the last second' story totally plauseable. Open booze in checked baggage = shady

Step 4. Declair your bottle of booze to customs, walk through unhasseled. They are not taste-testers.

On a similar note: this procedure will work for bringing back cuban items such as rum or cigars (pull the labels off the cigars, place in Dominican cigar box, etc.)

[cj001f]

At least in checked luggage you can claim someone may have planted it.

[mc_roon]

put in in an empty red wine bottle and shove the cork back in all the way. If you do it with the right type of bottle, like one from a hole-in-the wall winery they wont look twice at it, cause that is what they normally look like. But, if you have to ask...

And, getting caught does matter. A friend of mine had some special shit cause he got caught, so everytime they scanned his passport the did the full search over all of his bags.

[mday]

Sheesh, sack up and just carry the damn bottle through. As long as you don't have Schipol stamped on your passport, and you're not a dirty hippie (you don't telemark, do you?) they're likely not going to pay you much attention. If they do find it, your story is that you were told it was the type that is not made from wormwood by the salesman, and you brought it back as a novelty. I really can't believe that the consequences of being caught are serious enough to warrant anything more complicated than wrapping it well in to prevent breakage. I never had any problems bringing back a bottle of Absinthe or the extra bottle of Bordeaux when I was travelling to Europe frequently.

[Arty50]

This is so retarded. Don't do anything special. Just put the bottle in your bag and go through customs as you normally would. There's a limit as to how much alcohol of any type you can bring into the US. Everyone knows this, yet almost everyone brings back more. Rarely does anyone get busted unless they're bringing back a suitcase full of shit and it looks like they're doing it for commercial purposes. Even on the rare occasion they do "bust" you, they only take the extra bottles.

99.9% of the population doesn't know that absynthe is illegal, so just play dumb if they confiscate it. It's not like you're bringing 10 bottles back. Just say you didn't know and they'll let you go on your way. More than likely, none of this will happen and you'll just breeze through customs without them even opening your bag.

It's a bottle of absynthe, not a kilo of peruvian flake. They're not really gonna care.