Sharks, man

**BmillsSkier** · 07-13-2023, 01:02 PM

The internet is listening to us; the schedule for this year's Shark Week was in one of my feeds just now and upon a closer look I saw this interesting programming update:

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You know some junior producer in Discovery's offices said during the planning meeting for this year's Shark Week, "OK, hear me out, we saw how well Cocaine Bear did right?!? So this year we do.... COCAINE SHARKS! Yeah? That's good right?"

Also, it would be neat if I didn't have to explain cocaine and how animals get it again to my kid.

**Supermoon** · 07-13-2023, 01:27 PM

Originally Posted by BmillsSkier

Also, it would be neat if I didn't have to explain cocaine and how animals get it again to my kid.

"Look, the sharks probably get the cocaine the same way the bear did... No, we can't take the boat out lookin for sharks OR cocaine."

**BmillsSkier** · 07-13-2023, 02:33 PM

In their defense, I guess Columbian bam-bam shark is the next logical step after the Jackass-hosted Shark Week.

If they somehow work Bam Margera into Cocaine Shark then their producers just may be operating on a level greater than I have given them credit for.

**mcski** · 07-13-2023, 03:37 PM

I cant believe that they still haven’t done a cross over episode with Card Sharks

Whammy Shark!

**BmillsSkier** · 07-13-2023, 04:00 PM

I've got it. This year's Shark Week will be hosted jointly by Jason Momoa (cause apparently he already is) and a coked up Tara Reid, star of Sharknado.

**JimmyCarter** · 07-13-2023, 04:04 PM

Originally Posted by BmillsSkier

Tara Reid, star of Sharknado.

Steve Sanders would like a fucking word

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**BmillsSkier** · 07-13-2023, 04:08 PM

My apologies Steve-o.

Tell you what, he can come too if he brings ol' Boobs Malone, Tiffani Thiessen.

**m2711c** · 07-13-2023, 05:16 PM

them sharks can’t read calendars…

**BmillsSkier** · 07-13-2023, 05:23 PM

Those people on the rafts to the right must have shit their pants.

Fuck being that close to a shark who’s in chase, bite, eat mode.

**Core Shot** · 07-13-2023, 06:36 PM

I’m working on a script.

SHART NADO

It’s like sharknado, but a bit more messy.

**BmillsSkier** · 07-13-2023, 06:47 PM

If Tara Reid is in it, it’s almost certainly going to be messy.

Also, Discovery may just be ahead of the game here with the cocaine bud and cocaine that programming.

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**riser4** · 07-14-2023, 07:34 AM

Originally Posted by BmillsSkier

If Tara Reid is in it, it’s almost certainly going to be messy.

Also, Discovery may just be ahead of the game here with the cocaine bud and cocaine that programming.

Never trust a chef that doesn't do hard drugs or have a serious drinking problem.

**BmillsSkier** · 07-14-2023, 07:49 AM

Right?

Industry people were always so much more fun.

**BmillsSkier** · 07-21-2023, 05:36 AM

My feed must know I’m heading to the beach this weekend.

Or that it’s Shark Week. Either way.

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**BmillsSkier** · 07-21-2023, 05:45 AM

Originally Posted by BmillsSkier

The internet is listening to us; the schedule for this year's Shark Week was in one of my feeds just now and upon a closer look I saw this interesting programming update:

You know some junior producer in Discovery's offices said during the planning meeting for this year's Shark Week, "OK, hear me out, we saw how well Cocaine Bear did right?!? So this year we do.... COCAINE SHARKS! Yeah? That's good right?"

Also, it would be neat if I didn't have to explain cocaine and how animals get it again to my kid.

Would you look at that. Apparently Discovery was in on cocaine sharks before the tabloids. https://www.the-sun.com/tech/8645979...-eating-drugs/

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That’s the winning Florida bingo card right there; coked up white shark vs methed-out Florida man in an all out death match.

**riser4** · 07-21-2023, 11:18 AM

No bath salts?

**BmillsSkier** · 07-21-2023, 11:27 AM

These are sharks, not Florida-man; they have standards.

Only the finest blanco for these whites.

**SumJongGuy** · 07-21-2023, 12:57 PM

I bet the bears are pissed. Urban legend gaining steam..

https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/...59795ea4&ei=16

**BmillsSkier** · 07-21-2023, 01:48 PM

I can’t wait to see what the next species is to go skiing.

**Supermoon** · 07-21-2023, 04:06 PM

Originally Posted by BmillsSkier

These are sharks, not Florida-man; they have standards.

Only the finest blanco for these whites.

They don’t call them white sharks for nothing

**fantastic_damage** · 07-23-2023, 10:10 AM

Nobody has mentioned the Russian guy who was completely devoured on camera by a Tiger shark back in June?? Happened in Egypt on the Red Sea. Probably one of the worst animal vs human predation videos I have even seen. Warning it’s pretty disturbing:

https://youtu.be/tgEm6_AbuTs

The actually caught the damn thing with nets and everyone took turns beating it on the beach, I guess they stuffed it and will be mounting it somewhere, pretty insane.