my life is falling apart

[Timberridge]

Fred, does dad have any hobbies?

[whipski]

just another shopping mall soap opera

[BmillsSkier]

Sorry you're going through it Fred, I am curious though about the letters from Dad.

[Core Shot]

If you're accompanied to ----------- with this woman you'll need to rent two camels to carry all your stuff. Didn't you tell me that most of the females your age come with a lot of baggage ? And, if you run into the Nigerian prince who wanted to deposit $10,000,000 in my bank account tell him I haven't seen the money yet and would like him to return the $ 5,000 I wired him for handling fees.
Finally, be gentle with --------. He has over 6 feet of snow in his yard.
Dad

Someone needs to create a FastFredDad alias.

I like this guy.

[Percy Rideout]

Come up and party in Aspen for the weekend for some new cougar tail. Cant promise no tears though.

The lady and i are experienced boaters, and would love to join you on the grand trip if you got room!

[The AD]

I think I'd prefer Sky, Phoenix or Leaf to @(^%$, but that's just me.

Apparently fastfred's parents are big Q*Bert fans.

[mud]

onlyfans.com/fastfred

[fastfred]

unfortunately there was a number of emails that went back and forth where a follow up phone call resulted in him telling me he thought I was joking
too much personal info was in the emails so I can't post them here

yesterday I received this one:

Fred:
Here's the headline for an article in Saturday's Wall Street Journal . Would you like me to send you the entire story ?
Dad

Meddling Parents Hire Dating Coaches for Their Grown Children


unfortunately/fortunately I may have realized I'm not relationship material but I'll discuss this with my therapist in two weeks
this new budding relationship (note do not send your parents photos of you and new girl taken together in front of the christmas tree like your some happy couple that has been in a relationship for a year) when it's only been a few weeks

well its falling apart, for christmas eve day she made me bone her five times in one day, I felt like a high school kid all day long, just walking around with a raging boner, I'd just touch her and she would melt and her clothes would fall off and I'd pop another cialis

but chrsitmas day is where it fell apart we ended up pretty hammered by late afternoon, she has this huge 5000 sq ft in breckenridge and of course we are all huddled into one corner of this sprawling house by the fireplace, I looked over at her mom and asked, "what language are you speaking? I can't understand a word your saying?" sure as shit the rage with a full blown south boston accent came at me and I knew it was over meanwhile her sister in law who I've known for like forever was throwing up and her brother was acting like a referee trying to get everyone to act like anything but a dysfunctional irish family

the next morning when I tried to roll her over and have morning sex she stopped me and we had a long conversation about how we might not be a good fit

[singlecross]

Buy a box of Dunkin Donuts for family breakfast and you’re back in like Flynn. And cut your friggin’ nails!

[huckbucket]

That's nothing that 2 Parliaments and a giant dump won't fix.

[DBdude]

unfortunately there was a number of emails that went back and forth where a follow up phone call resulted in him telling me he thought I was joking
too much personal info was in the emails so I can't post them here

yesterday I received this one:

Fred:
Here's the headline for an article in Saturday's Wall Street Journal . Would you like me to send you the entire story ?
Dad

Meddling Parents Hire Dating Coaches for Their Grown Children


unfortunately/fortunately I may have realized I'm not relationship material but I'll discuss this with my therapist in two weeks
this new budding relationship (note do not send your parents photos of you and new girl taken together in front of the christmas tree like your some happy couple that has been in a relationship for a year) when it's only been a few weeks

well its falling apart, for christmas eve day she made me bone her five times in one day, I felt like a high school kid all day long, just walking around with a raging boner, I'd just touch her and she would melt and her clothes would fall off and I'd pop another cialis

but chrsitmas day is where it fell apart we ended up pretty hammered by late afternoon, she has this huge 5000 sq ft in breckenridge and of course we are all huddled into one corner of this sprawling house by the fireplace, I looked over at her mom and asked, "what language are you speaking? I can't understand a word your saying?" sure as shit the rage with a full blown south boston accent came at me and I knew it was over meanwhile her sister in law who I've known for like forever was throwing up and her brother was acting like a referee trying to get everyone to act like anything but a dysfunctional irish family

the next morning when I tried to roll her over and have morning sex she stopped me and we had a long conversation about how we might not be a good fit

I feel you fred

I have been seeing someone for ten years. the last three years her mother has moved in. she is 82, wheel chair bound, can not get up on her own when she falls, and is mean as a snake

it hasn't been easy

[El Chupacabra]

That's nothing that 2 Parliaments and a giant dump won't fix.

Turn this mutha out!

[Timberridge]

That's nothing that 2 Parliaments and a giant dump won't fix.

So you want fred to tack on lung cancer and a backed up septic line to his list of problems?

[DBdude]

yeah - a diversion, something he can make real progress with

[MontuckyFried]

Buy a box of Dunkin Donuts for family breakfast and you’re back in like Flynn.

This. Sounds like ol' girl's gotta wicked hangover and emotions are ALWAYS way off the morning after a wild night. Sneak out real quick to grab some breakfast, donuts, coffee, the works, for everyone. Perhaps even apologize (even it's faux) for being a smartass. I know you didn't do anything wrong, but when it comes to family drama, I've found it best to sometimes just swallow my pride and lower the temperature. Forgiveness all the way around can usually be easily and swiftly achieved with a touch of humility.

Sounds like even if the girl is fun, the family's got a hair trigger when it comes to drama, so ummm.... good to know! Now you know the boundaries. Chalk last night up to the alcohol and move on with your lives. Even if things don't ultimately work out with this lady, you can at least maybe salvage what remains of the week. Godspeed, Fred. I've been there. It ain't fun. The makeup fun times can be rad, though.

[subtle plague]

I like the term raging boner.

[sb]

Doesn’t everyone?

[fatnslow]

5xday always comes with a price after 30. Pay up FF !

[old goat]

Guy with congestive heart failure manages to get it on 5x in a day. This needs to be written up in Nature, or in the Journal of Non-Reproducible Results.

[MagnificentUnicorn]

It’s amazing what O2 and Cialis can do


Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

[SumJongGuy]

Last sex olympics I heard he came in first AND third..

[neufox47]

Guy with congestive heart failure manages to get it on 5x in a day. This needs to be written up in Nature, or in the Journal of Non-Reproducible Results.

That much Cialis can’t be good for the heart.

[huckbucket]

Have we asked whether dad lives in the upstates? $10 says he does.

[Core Shot]

I like the term raging boner.

Meh. It’s redundant

[XXX-er]

That much Cialis can’t be good for the heart.

If you see alice

tell her i'm ready to go