A Requiem for a CVS
On April 27th, at the corner of Pennslyvania and North Ave in Baltimore, a tragedy occurred. A CVS of noble bearing was pillaged and burned.
It was unarmed.
Public officials have been quick to condemn the unknown assailants for their senseless acts of violence. People close to the CVS report that it had just stopped selling cigarettes, and was awaiting a new shipment of exclusive Nuance Salma Hayek beauty products.
Speaking from New York, the controversial Reverend Duane Reade said: “A tragedy like this affects us all. We demand that the people responsible be brought to justice. The senseless violence against everyday goods sold at sensible prices must end.”
The attack on the CVS comes mere weeks after Freddie Gray, some guy, was killed while in police custody. Questions have already been raised about Baltimore police. What is the point of rounding up and killing unarmed black men if something as trusted and respected as the CVS cannot be saved? Baltimore Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake announced that a full investigation is underway into how the CVS could be lost despite so many black youths fearing the unaccountable power of BPD. “We’ve seen this in Ferguson, but we didn’t expect it here,” said Rawlings-Blake. “But we know that stores of convenience are consistently attacked for no reason. It’s almost like the brutality is causing the violence, instead of quelling it. I don’t know what to do.”
Black leaders who want to be on television were also quick to condemn the violence. “That CVS produced 20, maybe 30 low-paying, dead-end jobs,” said local father Heathcliff Huxtable. “Why would you attack a store in your own community that is there to make as much money off of you as humanly possible, owned by a giant global corporation, which sells goods you need to survive at prices you can only occasionally afford?”
But Chambers of Commerce activists noted that it can be challenging to bring looters and rioters to justice for their heinous crimes. “A lot of people think that stores like CVS ‘had it coming’ you know,” said a local businessman. “It’s not like they burned a Williams Sonoma, or even a Whole Foods. People look at a CVS, the neighborhood it was in, the low-end products it sells, and just think ‘well, it probably should have done what the rioters wanted instead of just standing there and acting like it had a right to not be violated.’ It’s messed up, but these are the times we live in.”
Newly elected Maryland Governor Larry Hogan promised justice: “Rest assured, we will use this act of thuggery as justification to ignore the concerns of the local community, and crack down on any people who look like they might be a threat to other businesses, or look like the people who look like they could be a threat. Instead of separating rioters from peaceful citizens, we’re just going to treat them all the same and see where that gets us. ”
Only time will tell if the senseless violence can be repaired. “Once you burn a CVS, you either have to build a whole new CVS or make people drive further to get to a CVS,” said a police spokesperson. “They’re not like a human, when you kill a person they have the good sense to leave you alone forever.”
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