Teleboarding, WTF?

[cold_smoke]

Ok,
Here in Steamboat in the past couple years I have witnessed more then one person practicing this rediculous behavior...The boards I have seen are somewhere between a fat ski and a snowboard (like an M1111 +30%), with tele bindings mounted about directly behind each other. Would riding one of these,.. let alone bending both knees at once be awkward?
I had the pleasure of riding the lift with a teleboarder last season...
"So do your ever bend both knees at once?"
"Yeah,...in bumps"
?????
Whatever floats your boat I guess...But to me it defeats the whole point of versatility in teleing let alone skiing...guess that is why it's called teleboarding. I thought I was making up a name for this anomoly, then googled it and realized that is what it is in fact called...

The Teleboard® is a serious recreation device designed for intermediate and advanced skiers and snowboarders. Its unique ride and versatility, and the ease of learning the techniques, typically stun veteran skiers and snowboarders. Those who have spent time on the Teleboard® can attest to its advantages over skis and snowboards -- the incredible lightness, the carving power a rider can produce with light-weight telemark boots, the astonishing turning ability and high-speed stability, the way it crashes through bumps and crud and the way it floats through powder. Teleboard® provides maximum speed and control without cumbersome equipment.

...ditch the "cumbersome equipment", ride like a monoboarder and skin like a penguin on your teleboard.....a mandatory double pole plant is mandatory

Attachment 34277

And Blurred,... no teleboarding TR's either...

[flyby]

I thought about getting one of these for gaper day, but then I realized I'm not that desperate for disapproval.

[KungFu Eddie]

Err, what. I can't even imagine how retarded that would look. What next, teleskiblades?

[SuperChief]

Actually it looks really cool, It's more like an alpine snowboard setup, on the groomers they can rail some serious carves due to being able to get a really low stance and sink deep into the turn.

Still wouldn't buy one though.

[TeleHoar]

My buddy Hans rides his all the time, he seems to love it.

weird - kinda...but whatever. With all the different ways to ride the snow...why not. I would try it but I would probably kill myself. Then where would I be; dead...on a teleboard.
I'd rather be found dead from auto-erotic-asphyicsiation, much more dignified.

[hemas]

What next, teleskiblades?

Been there, done that... like 5 years ago or so.

[Pow4Brains]

A tele mono board.

[Rontele]

We need to get Hans to stop lurking and posting here, Bondo. Hans RIPS on his teleboard. But when he falls it looks like it hurts!

[GWB]

Teleboarding = An easy way to come out of the closet.


You don't even have to tell your parents, they will figure it out on there own.

[Evmo]

I, er, used to own one, bought it in college. Ask Tri-Ungulate though, he bought it from me...

[Telephil]

I've seen it too. It may quite possibly be the dumbest thing ever.

[Lurch]

I saw these things at a demo day in the late 90s and couldn't figure out why anyone would want to use it. The guy demoing it seemed to have less control than a normal snowboarder. The only thing more retarded is the rax ski.

[Sinecure]

This gets discussed periodically over on Bomberonline, the Alpine Snowboard forum (sort of like TGR, only smaller). I think of it as a sub-niche of the already niche sport of Alpine Snowboarding (Carving boards). To me it seems like a strange amalgamation of the two sports.

Another interesting device is called a Skwal. Basically take a narrow carving board (mine are 18cm in the waist) and make it way narrower. Like 110mm-120mm. You still use Alpine Snowboard boots and bindings that are very similar to alpine bindings, but with a narrower footprint and limited adjustability. Run angles around 80-85 degrees. You can carve like crazy, but you better have good balance. Staying upright while standing still seems very hard. My friends who have them, all have great balance on a carving board yet they look really squirrely on their skwals. I'd like to try a Skwal, but only for the novelty of it.

I've only seen one Teleboard actually in use. It was at Sugarbowl a few years ago. May be soy, but who cares as long as they are having fun in the snow.

[Wolfmansbro]

the strange thing is they are allowed at alta

[pechelman]

looks like a great way to create some muscular asymmetry as well

so yea, a monoski with telemark bindings
weird.

[Tri-Ungulate]

I, er, used to own one, bought it in college. Ask Tri-Ungulate though, he bought it from me...

Took it out a few times. It was kinda like waterskiing, with better edge control. Interesting novelty, but still I couldn't bring myself to do it all that much. Could be good on deep days, but then I'd want to be on my regular skis.

A dude I skiied with was really into Teleboarding, and could rip the steeps and catch huge air. I couldn't seem to get as much control, though maybe I didn't put enough effort into learning.

[pechelman]

next thing you know, someones going to get 2 skis and attach them at a central location and mount two toes perpendicular to how the normally are on one ski and do the same for the heels on the other ski

it would like like a catamaran

yea, a catboard
brilliantly pointless

[skimoore]

I'd rather be waterboarding.

[todug27]

when would you even bend your front knee? i dont understand the pysics of the thing, i just keep picturing the front knee bend going straight into a tumble.

[pechelman]

it would be a little cooler if they could manage a way to mount the L & R binding on sliding tracks so you could actually lead with the correct leg and get down in a tele turn type stance.

[tex1230]

One of the best alpine boarders I know wrecked himself Big Time on one of those...

Sinecure - lmao - bomber "like tgr - only smaller"

[Evmo]

Took it out a few times. It was kinda like waterskiing, with better edge control. Interesting novelty, but still I couldn't bring myself to do it all that much. Could be good on deep days, but then I'd want to be on my regular skis.

A dude I skiied with was really into Teleboarding, and could rip the steeps and catch huge air. I couldn't seem to get as much control, though maybe I didn't put enough effort into learning.

Yeah, I never was able to "get good" at it...

That said, for a really, really boring groomer, it can be fun b/c it just loves being on edge...

[altagirl]

Took it out a few times. It was kinda like waterskiing, with better edge control. Interesting novelty, but still I couldn't bring myself to do it all that much. Could be good on deep days, but then I'd want to be on my regular skis.

A dude I skiied with was really into Teleboarding, and could rip the steeps and catch huge air. I couldn't seem to get as much control, though maybe I didn't put enough effort into learning.

Was the Doug by any chance? I've seen him do backflips, zipperline bumps, you name it. It doesn't look like anything I'd want to do, but you can't say that guy isn't killing it on that tele-board (or on regular tele gear, alpine gear, or a snowboard either).

[trainnvain]

One of our local adaptive clubs has on mounted on one of their sit-skis for deep days.

[cold_smoke]

when would you even bend your front knee? i dont understand the pysics of the thing, i just keep picturing the front knee bend going straight into a tumble.

I could see bending the front knee, but lifting the front heel is another story..., if the whole thing is not pointless, the front being a tele binding seems to be...