Editor's Note: This is largely a work of satire. Our glorious leaders are Patriots fans, so the opinions contained in this piece are those of the author, and no one else's.
Most of us have already seen the video of Tom Brady eating it off a small jump in the park at the Yellowstone Club. If you haven't, he does an in-depth review of what went wrong in the above Instagram post. However, it seems that he remains undeterred by his earlier failure, and is prepared to learn from his mistakes. Upon examining a video of Lindsey Vonn catching some serious air during a race, he concludes that he needs a "way bigger hill and way more speed."
It seems like TB12 has got it figured out. With a big enough hill and plenty of speed there's nothing that could possibly go wrong. We wholeheartedly encourage Brady to go as big as possible. Skiers in the know are aware that "starting small" is a scare tactic perpetuated by FIS to keep amateur park skiers from reaching their full potential. If Tom is smart he'll start off with a switch triple 14 and progress from there.
It's clear that the FIS-paid trolls are out in force, discouraging Tom from expanding his horizons:
How much is FIS paying you, trolls? Instagram photo.
Despite the best efforts of skiing's evil overlords, Brady is resolved to huck himself, rebuking the naysayers in classic GOAT fashion:
Nice try, Gian-Franco Kaspar. Brady is immune to your influence! Instagram photo.
Even Jimmy Chin, the outdoor industry's version of a golden boy, is pushing Brady to launch:
If you can't trust Jimmy Chin, who can you trust? Dude just won an Oscar! Instagram photo.
Real skiers such as Julian Carr are encouraging Tom to reach for the stars, echoing our sentiments:
View this post on Instagram
I need your help, tag @tombrady in comments below, he just posted a video saying he wants to hit more jumps on skis. Tag him below if you think he should send it off some cliffs w @o_leeps & myself next year. Tag him as many times as you can over next couple days. Thanks! Let’s send it @tombrady. VC: @addierafford @spyderactive @spyoptic @tenderbelly #pushpeaks #rockdiscrete
It’s been a bit since we’ve seen anyone channel their inner Erik Roner and point it straight off one of the biggest and proudest cliffs in Jackson – the massive air looker’s left of Cody Peak’s Central Couloir. With all-time snow coverage and a healthy dose of blue sky, @tmeador_ski hucked it off Cody this weekend, pulling his chute above a small crowd of gaping onlookers. RELATED: Julian Carr Explains his Cliff Hucking Process That wasn’t the only hairball
Big Bear Mountain Resort Morning Arrive at Los Angeles International Airport and head straight for San Bernardino National Forest, home of Big Bear Mountain Resort. Consisting of twin properties—Bear Mountain and Snow Summit—Big Bear is the place where Southern California goes to ski and ride. Head to the top of Bear Peak and start your day on Geronimo, the highest lift served run in Southern California at 8,805 feet. To really get your legs burning, test your skills at the canyons:
While great snow can happen anywhere, some destinations and regions are powder town legends, due to their higher elevations, vast snowpack, lake-effect snowfall, or other location-based conditions. Whichever your regional snow preference, the multi-mountain Ikon Pass has you covered with access to the planet’s best destinations—giving you the flexibility to chase the best powder and make the most of your winter adventures. RELATED: Hitting Winter Park's Bike Jumps on SkisCMH Get