Doctors fight to reverse rising stoke levels. Wikimedia Commons photo.
MIRKWOOD, Calif. — Tahoe’s acting Emissary of Stoke Steven “Scoop” Scooper lost control of his stoke level Wednesday after receiving word that Mirkwood's upper elevations had received over three feet of fluffy, blower snow.
Upon learning the severity of the big dump, the man suffered what medical officials are referring to as a "stoke attack," a condition caused by out-of-control, spiking stoke levels. Physical symptoms include panting, yelling and giving high fives to random strangers.
“He kept screaming something about his stoke level rising,” South Lake resident Mikey Babcock, 26, told TGR. “The dude was, like, dry heaving stoke."
After the onset of the stoke attack, Scooper allegedly rode pow for several hours. Attempts to hospitalize the snow reporter were thwarted by his repeated disappearance into what local experts are calling "the white room."
Hours later — after tracking up most of the hill — Scooper was taken to Mirkwood's medical clinic, where he was given horse tranquilizers and shown looped golf footage in an effort to calm him down.
There's no hope for him — he's just too stoked.
Attending physicians were reportedly stunned by the rapid onset of the stoke attack, but heartened by the eventual de-stoking of the overexcited spokesperson. However, despite seeing progress, many stoke experts believe Scooper will quickly redevelop his condition, and get stoked again upon release.
"He's kinda out of options," Scooper's doctor said. "It's supposed to snow another foot tomorrow night. There's no hope for him — he's just too stoked."
From The Column: The Bumion
MTN. TOWN, USA — A woman's attempt to teach her boyfriend to ski "totally failed" Thursday when the couple started yelling at each other halfway up a local bootpack. Cold feet, a slow pace and boyfriend Brett Schroder’s strict adherence to a frequent marijuana-use policy left the couple bickering and on the cusp of a total meltdown. RELATED: Does The Size Of My Boyfriend's Skis Matter? “He’s such an asshole,” ski bum Becky Sanders, 24, told TGR of her now ex-boyfriend. "I thought I could
There is no doubt in anyone’s mind that avalanches are terrifying. They are one of the purest demonstrations of Mother Nature’s immense, uncontrollable power—and unfortunately, more and more often, they are claiming the lives of people that we love. For the average person, news of a deadly avalanche might congest your newsfeed, but passes on in a few days. For the loved ones of the victims, however, this is never the case, the memory of the life lost will always remain. RELATED: 8 Things I
Four years ago, Peter Wells came to his brother with an idea: “Let’s start a ski company.” They wrote a business plan, got the money together and put the pedal to the metal. “It takes time to build a brand and get our store out there, and for people to accept a new brand,” Tim Wells told TGR. “But we’re doing it.” The ski industry is changing, and Sego Ski Co. is ready to take advantage of it. Sego is poised for wild growth in a changing industry: In just four seasons they’ve gone from