Doctors fight to reverse rising stoke levels. Wikimedia Commons photo.
MIRKWOOD, Calif. — Tahoe’s acting Emissary of Stoke Steven “Scoop” Scooper lost control of his stoke level Wednesday after receiving word that Mirkwood's upper elevations had received over three feet of fluffy, blower snow.
Upon learning the severity of the big dump, the man suffered what medical officials are referring to as a "stoke attack," a condition caused by out-of-control, spiking stoke levels. Physical symptoms include panting, yelling and giving high fives to random strangers.
“He kept screaming something about his stoke level rising,” South Lake resident Mikey Babcock, 26, told TGR. “The dude was, like, dry heaving stoke."
After the onset of the stoke attack, Scooper allegedly rode pow for several hours. Attempts to hospitalize the snow reporter were thwarted by his repeated disappearance into what local experts are calling "the white room."
Hours later — after tracking up most of the hill — Scooper was taken to Mirkwood's medical clinic, where he was given horse tranquilizers and shown looped golf footage in an effort to calm him down.
There's no hope for him — he's just too stoked.
Attending physicians were reportedly stunned by the rapid onset of the stoke attack, but heartened by the eventual de-stoking of the overexcited spokesperson. However, despite seeing progress, many stoke experts believe Scooper will quickly redevelop his condition, and get stoked again upon release.
"He's kinda out of options," Scooper's doctor said. "It's supposed to snow another foot tomorrow night. There's no hope for him — he's just too stoked."
From The Column: The Bumion
Source: besthealthcaredegress.com RELATED: The Ultimate Animal Video Encounters To understand how these numbers compare to more "natural" causes, see this US data from the Center For Disease Control. For parents wanting a more focused guide to youth activities, take a look at this data on sports injuries compiled by Stanford Children's Hospital. More data on 20th century death statistics from the World Health Organization visualized by informationisbeautiful.net
On a base level, everything you could ever do in the outdoors qualifies as fun. From bluebird pow days off the high-speed quad to grueling multi-day backpacking trips in the rain and sleet, it's all better than being at work, and thus fun. But do you know how to properly classify the type of fun you're about to embark on this weekend? You may have overheard someone at the trailhead talking about some "Type II fun" and enduring some burly outing to bag a peak, so we here at TGR wanted
Ever take a look through the classifieds, and think “who would buy this sh**?” Well, here's another one of those items, except we secretly think it’s actually pretty cool. For a cool $6000 CAD (today that’s merely $4550 USD), you can get yourself your very own stretch limo snowcat. According to the Vancouver Craigslist post, it’s a custom-fabbed SV 250 Bombardier snow cat combined with 1989 Cadillac stretch limo. Talk about showing up at the hill in style.