Tipsy mother of ski bums Connie Williams uses abrasive honesty to confound fellow partygoers into awkward social submission. Flickr Creative Commons photo.
MARTHA'S VINEYARD, Mass. — A wealthy mother suffered a social shaming Wednesday after she was forced to disclose her two 20-something adult children are complete dirtbags.
Using euphemisms such as “living the dream” and “30 is the new 20” to describe her kids’ lack of financial and professional ambition, 57-year-old Connie Williams was cornered by several pretentious moms. The ladies forced Williams involvement in a rhetorical pissing contest to determine whose offspring was best meeting capitalism’s standards of success.
According to eyewitnesses, the Maine-based mother quietly listened to her socialite cohorts compare their children’s social and monetary status for approximately 23 minutes (and two-and-a-half double margs) before letting loose.
“I was sick of hearing about their kids’ banking and tech jobs,” Williams told TGR in an exclusive interview, “so I just told those bitches the truth — and it felt good!”
I told them that my kids wash dishes, live in trucks, and ski pow, and then, it got real quiet.
When finally forced to divulge what her children had done with their 20’s, the tipsy mother allegedly pulled no punches.
“I told them that my kids ‘wash dishes, live in trucks and ski pow,’ and then, it got real quiet,” Williams recounted. “They seemed very uncomfortable, and one of them tried to clarify, asking: ‘Yes, but, what do they do…?’
Williams then reportedly launched into a 20-minute expose of her children’s dirtbag lifestyles, detailing global travel, mountains climbed, breaks surfed, rivers run, dogs loved, and arrests made. Sources confirmed that during the tirade, each mother crept away until the only person left listening was a dutiful — but equally as wasted — bartender, who was in fact stuck in his stationary location.
Attempts to reach Williams’ kids, Tom and Ali, were unsuccessful. But during her interview with TGR, a proud Williams indicated Tom is somewhere in southwest British Columbia trying to find the Canadian love of his life while riding brown pow, and Ali is in Bali “finding herself” while studying to be a yoga instructor.
From The Column: The Bumion
TGR Lead Editor Justin Fann in his natural element. | Nic Alegre photo. Working at TGR is definitely a work-hard play-hard environment. But lucky for us, much of the working hard looks a lot like playing hard. For TGR Lead Editor Justin Fann, who’s been around here longer than most of us, that daily routine usually involves getting his hands dirty on some of the biggest projects we’ve ever worked on. We’re talking films like Andy Irons: Kissed by God, Deeper, Higher, and any of the annual
Kai Jones bidding adieu to yet another epic season at our home mountain Jackson Hole! | Nic Alegre photo. Closing day is always a bittersweet one, meaning our favorite time of year has come to an end yet again. However, we have to say, the ’20-’21 season at Jackson Hole Mountain Resort was certainly one to remember. Like at many other ski resorts, it was the season that almost didn’t happen, thanks to the global Covid-19 pandemic. But, thanks to the hard work of our friends at the resort,
Kent Kreitler is a living legend and TGR Hall of Famer. He’ll be remembered as the skier who helped bring tricks to the backcountry, but he’s so much more than that. He was part of an elite crew of skiers that pioneered big mountain skiing in Alaska…the generation that lived fast and took chances. In part two of the podcast on The Powell Movement, he talks about the Tahoe years, filming with the Standard Crew, stomping tricks in the terrain park on 215cm skis, the X Games, sponsors, money,