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Millennial Struggles With Adulting, 1st World Problems

Beset by first world problems, Shania Mudd takes a moment to reflect on "the struggle." Sam Morse photo. 

JACKSON, Wyo. — A young millennial woman suffered an existential crisis Tuesday evening while searching for a ticket to a sold-out Pretty Lights show. 

Thirty-two-year-old Shania Mudd's efforts to gain entry to the show were unsuccessful, but sources confirmed that she may have snuck into the packed venue for an encore performance the following night. Mud found the buildup of first world ski town problems to be almost too much to bear.

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“I hit rock bottom at a ski swap the other day,” Mudd told TGR in an exclusive, hard-hitting interview. “I'd just found the perfect set of pow skis for next winter, and I was ready to pull the trigger, but the lady at the register wouldn't take Venmo. I lost my debit card months ago, what the fuck am I supposed to do — carry around cash everywhere? Standing there, surrounded by all those ski swappers buying gear, I felt sad. And powerless."  

I hope nobody steals my bike — that townie is all I've got left.

Mudd reported the build-up of first world problems is beginning to take its toll, spilling over into her work and relationships.

"Before the ski swap, I was already in a bad place," Mudd said dejectedly. "The other day, I found out that my buddy who bartends at the Moose is moving away. I don't even want to say it, but ... I might have to start buying drinks when I go there. Fuck!"  

To top it all off, Mudd totaled her car, "Rhonda the Honda" while giving a friend a ride home to Wilson.

“And I live in Idaho,” she continued, “so now that Rhonda’s in the shop, I have to hitchhike from one beautiful valley into another — it sucks. I don’t have a lock, so I just throw my bicycle into some bushes on my way to thumbing it. I hope nobody steals it — that townie is all I've got left."

Mudd’s longtime friend and confidant, Samantha Morsels, 31, told TGR that Shania is self-admittedly a hot mess, but that’s always been a part of her charm.

“The other day I had to console her after she tried to friend a crush on Facebook and didn’t get a response,” Morsels said in a Skype interview. “Shania’s always dealing with some type of chaos — but we all have a friend like that — one that keeps you on your toes. We love her for that.”

In spite of the daunting challenges that confront her, Mudd maintains that things aren't as bad as they seem, and that through a healthy dose of grit, fairy magic and womp-nasty base music, she can overcome the day-to-day challenges of living in paradise.  

“The struggle is real,” Mudd lamented. “I may have bad luck, but I also have good luck. I live a charmed life!”

From The Column: The Bumion

About The Author

stash member Sam Morse

TGR Editor-at-Large. author of The Ski Town Fairytale and creative behind The Bumion. Lover of steep-and-deep lines, long trails—and hot springs waiting in the distance.

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