Franks and Beans

[chicken feathers]

Happened to me the other day. Just the frank. No beans. Felt a slight pinch, like an injection. Thankfully my boxers took the brunt of it and I avoided any further entanglement. I had forgotten about it, but right now I've got carhartt's on and the heavy duty zipper has got me feeling squeamish.
Stay safe out there this holiday weekend.

[bennymac]

The “smartless” podcast interview with Ben Stiller briefly touches on this scene. Very funny podcast.

Vibes to your frank. Good job not getting the beans involved - let alone above the frank.

[J. Barron DeJong]

I have a cousin who had to go to the hospital to get the zipper cut away from his frank he got it snagged so bad.

[riser4]

I have a cousin who had to go to the hospital to get the zipper cut away from his frank he got it snagged so bad.

Ouch.

[Brownski]

Um, this thread makes me very uncomfortable

[riser4]

Um, this thread makes me very uncomfortable

This.

[k2skier112]

What the actual fuck are you guys doing zipping your trousers!!!

Next time maybe let the erection settle before you zip in in a frantic hurry...or buy button fly

[riser4]

What the actual fuck are you guys doing zipping your trousers!!!

Next time maybe let the erection settle before you zip in in a frantic hurry...or buy button fly

Sage.

[TBS]

Kilts have no zippers

[Danno]

My boys need a home.

[TBS]

Um, this thread makes me very uncomfortable

You want uncomfortable?
One of my kids used to work as a home health nurse for developmentally disabled kids in Phoenix.
One of her clients was a teenage male who lived with a gang banger cousin.
Client got ahold of cuz’ Glock. Stuck it in his pants and strutted around the house.
Until the gun discharged. Strafed his dick. She said about 3mm deep

Rather than go to hospital and answer a bunch of pesky questions about a felon with a Glock in his home, they wrapped his dick in gauze & surgical tape.
It became infected.

She had to clean up the mess

[fatnslow]

I have a friend who did this as a little kid while his older sister and friends were at the house...They tagged teamed it free willy. Poor guys was still traumatized 15 years later.

[The Reverend Floater]

Zipped may wang at a urinal while high on ecstasy, standing next to Woody Harrelson. True story.

[irul&ublo]

Did that once. Zipper shattered.

[PB]

Did that once. Zipper shattered.

#endofthread.

[old goat]

This is why I don't zip up my fly.

When I was a resident the psych ward called me to see a schizophrenic patient they had just admitted with a rubber band wrapped very tightly around his penis, presumably in an attempt to amputate it. They wanted a surgeon to remove the rubber band. I approached the guy and he shrank back into the far corner of his bed, against the wall, with a wild look in his eye. I tried to reason calmly with him with my best bedside manner but he was having none of it. Just then two psych residents walked by, saw what was going on, and without a word spoken one tackled him around the knees, the other got him in a choke hold, and I was able to cut the rubber band off. The next day the chief of urology thought it would be amusing to round on this guy, with his entourage in tow--other professors, residents, community urologists--and me out of sight at the very back. As soon as they entered the guy's room, before they could tell him who they were, he sprang up in bed and screamed "godammit you fag urologists get the fuck out of here". So maybe the guy wasn't so delusional.

[bodywhomper]

I have a cousin who had to go to the hospital to get the zipper cut away from his frank he got it snagged so bad.

Family get togethers must be pretty funny!

[Meadow Skipper]

This one time I was late to work (firefighter) where we had PT first thing in the morning and zipped my dick up putting on my shorts as I rushed to get ready.

It really hurt, like a lot, but these other stories make my agony pale in comparison. I shouldn’t even post this.

[Jong Lafitte]

Goddamn Ben looks so young, I had forgotten how old that movie is. FFS I’m old.
Oh wait, wasn’t it a flashback or In the past? Oh I forget.

Whippersnappers.

Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

[Brownski]

You want uncomfortable?
One of my kids used to work as a home health nurse for developmentally disabled kids in Phoenix.
One of her clients was a teenage male who lived with a gang banger cousin.
Client got ahold of cuz’ Glock. Stuck it in his pants and strutted around the house.
Until the gun discharged. Strafed his dick. She said about 3mm deep

Rather than go to hospital and answer a bunch of pesky questions about a felon with a Glock in his home, they wrapped his dick in gauze & surgical tape.
It became infected.

She had to clean up the mess

Yeah, that makes it worse. Didn’t Plaxico hit himself in the dick? Or was it a near miss? I can’t remember now. How long ago was that one?