Subpoenaed. Legal advice por favor?

[LightRanger]

Subsequent information changed the impression I got from post #1 quite a bit.

Corporate attorney is dumb as rocks here. If she knew how long Plaintiff's fishing trip would take to respond to for something marginally relevant, she should have called Plaintiff's counsel to narrow the scope prior to dumping it all on C.

Carry on.

[exsparky]

I love court. Some people stress out, I look forward to it.

I have 7 dollar bills in my office in a 24x36 frame with the name of the guy/company I beat on each of them. People ask why the frame is so big, I tell them... I'm not done.

I've been deposed and testified... a lot.

I have always been found to be "credible." Almost every guy I was put up against was found to be "not credible" including professional witnesses. I've always taken great lengths to make a judge think I'm affable and sincere.

-I don't ever lie.

-During the deposition I am not affable, I am a dick and I try to make the lawyers trip up, look bad and frustrate them.
-Demand to get your parking validated before you get deposed. At 10pm they won't know how to do it and you will get stuck with the tab.

-Don't answer compound questions.
-If you don't like the question make them rephrase it, several times if possible.
-If a lawyer asks you the same question 4 times trying to get you to give them the answer they want, ask them to "please order everybody pizza, if you are going to repeat everything four times, its going to be way past dinner before we finish."

-if being deposed by multiple parties(ie 3 or more sides) rank them aloud as far as how much you think they are getting paid per hour.
- Email yourself when things happen to a separate gmail account. I met Joe at his place on the 20th for 2 hours to go over his "xyz" then email to your joe xyz at gmail account and take pictures of everything.
-Record phone calls and meetings, don't tell anybody you did until asked. (records by one side are legal in colorado)
-I don't use a lawyer until the right time. I'm known for sending hundreds of emails to opposing counsel. Cost them time and money. When the time comes for a lawyer, hire the meanest one possible. Cost the other side 10x what they want to spend.

-I don't ever lie.

-I usually never answer "I don't recall" but I think it shows you are bad at court.
-Taking a long pause randomly is fun. If they rush you call them out.
-I don't agree to any definition given to me for anything. Always give your own.
-I don't ever get upset or emotional.
-Bring drinks plural and always act like you are ready to sit there for a month.
-Take a break every hour and set the tempo then mess it up randomly if they get used to it.
-You can be bullied or be the bully, you get to pick.
-Lawyers don't like to look bad in court, if they think that will happen they will try not to call you as a witness.
-I don't have a corvette, they don't make me happy. Justice makes me happy so I blow my money on really good lawyers to fight crooks. I have funded cases I wasn't apart of because I thought one side was evil.
-If you aren't in the fight, make both sides look terrible.
-Give your opinion of both sides view of the truth. People drift and fail to object when they should.

- I don't ever lie.

Judges deal with criminal wackos all day, their version of reality is therefore bias that everybody is some kind of crook. The verdicts I have seen don't really reflect on the merits of the case. I've lost an unemployment case to a guy in jail we both thought I easily won. I won a case I know I should have lost badly.

Court is unpredictable.

[RootSkier]

This thread delivers.

[fatnslow]

Here is my advice since I like to spend time with courts and Lawyers

Act stupid. Not Billy bob dumb but slightly confused. Works like a charm.

Follow everything everyone says. Use your best listening skills and memorization. Focus. When the lawyer fucks w you zing them back w something they said a few minutes ago. Law is all about finding inconsistencies.

Back to being stupid. I used to be an actor. Acting is gold in a court room. Acting is all about using motivation and feelings from past experience. I count ceiling tiles switches and electric outlets to help create the illusion of confusion and lack of memory. Sometimes I stare at lawyers clothing and look for patterns. They wonder why you are lookin at them but not making eye contact. It makes them uneasy.

Almost had a judge catch onto what I was doing once.

Never lie. If you need to lie go back to confusion. Confusion can create denial which is truthful lieing.



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Fastfred, which one are you ?

[Cono Este]

I love court. Some people stress out, I look forward to it.

I have 7 dollar bills in my office in a 24x36 frame with the name of the guy/company I beat on each of them. People ask why the frame is so big, I tell them... I'm not done.

I've been deposed and testified... a lot.

I have always been found to be "credible." Almost every guy I was put up against was found to be "not credible" including professional witnesses. I've always taken great lengths to make a judge think I'm affable and sincere.

-I don't ever lie.

-During the deposition I am not affable, I am a dick and I try to make the lawyers trip up, look bad and frustrate them.
-Demand to get your parking validated before you get deposed. At 10pm they won't know how to do it and you will get stuck with the tab.

-Don't answer compound questions.
-If you don't like the question make them rephrase it, several times if possible.
-If a lawyer asks you the same question 4 times trying to get you to give them the answer they want, ask them to "please order everybody pizza, if you are going to repeat everything four times, its going to be way past dinner before we finish."

-if being deposed by multiple parties(ie 3 or more sides) rank them aloud as far as how much you think they are getting paid per hour.
- Email yourself when things happen to a separate gmail account. I met Joe at his place on the 20th for 2 hours to go over his "xyz" then email to your joe xyz at gmail account and take pictures of everything.
-Record phone calls and meetings, don't tell anybody you did until asked. (records by one side are legal in colorado)
-I don't use a lawyer until the right time. I'm known for sending hundreds of emails to opposing counsel. Cost them time and money. When the time comes for a lawyer, hire the meanest one possible. Cost the other side 10x what they want to spend.

-I don't ever lie.

-I usually never answer "I don't recall" but I think it shows you are bad at court.
-Taking a long pause randomly is fun. If they rush you call them out.
-I don't agree to any definition given to me for anything. Always give your own.
-I don't ever get upset or emotional.
-Bring drinks plural and always act like you are ready to sit there for a month.
-Take a break every hour and set the tempo then mess it up randomly if they get used to it.
-You can be bullied or be the bully, you get to pick.
-Lawyers don't like to look bad in court, if they think that will happen they will try not to call you as a witness.
-I don't have a corvette, they don't make me happy. Justice makes me happy so I blow my money on really good lawyers to fight crooks. I have funded cases I wasn't apart of because I thought one side was evil.
-If you aren't in the fight, make both sides look terrible.
-Give your opinion of both sides view of the truth. People drift and fail to object when they should.

- I don't ever lie.

Judges deal with criminal wackos all day, their version of reality is therefore bias that everybody is some kind of crook. The verdicts I have seen don't really reflect on the merits of the case. I've lost an unemployment case to a guy in jail we both thought I easily won. I won a case I know I should have lost badly.

Court is unpredictable.

Awesome.

I’ve learnt to just avoid crooks. You can out spend someone in court to win but collecting is another game. I have liens all over California and every few yrs spend a couple of grand to make sure everything is in place should they slip up.

I would rather collect on that judgement than win the powerball. If I ever do, I’ll probably have to trade St. Louis for the arctic circle because the fucking Chinese mafia will be looking for me.


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[stuckathuntermtn]

Just as an IT guy (and lover of trees), fuck you and your lawyer.

[Conundrum]

Hey dog, I didn't ask myself to print a bunch of shit nor is my job in IT. If you don't work for my company and you don't suck at IT, you should apply for a job here and help them fix shit. Our IT team is pretty weak. Why do IT people always defend other IT departments at other companies? I know people at other companies who have a job similar to mine and I'm okay saying they suck at their jobs. Those are the people I pick up new clients from. So in closing, kiss my ass, kiss his ass, happy Hanukkah.

By the way, remember the time you almost sent a bunch of lap tops to an address in Boise that doesn't exist and you couldn't figure out how the scam worked and then I told you that the 14th floor address for the buyer of the building that only has 11 floors probably might be a good way to know someone is trying to trick you? Never mind, don't apply for an IT job at my employer. I'm not sure you could help. Maybe you've moved on from Best Buy so disregard all of this if you're kicking ass now. I hope you are. Not that there's anything wrong with working at Best Buy.

[LightRanger]

^^^ Sig-worthy response.

[teleee]

Conondrum for the MFing win

[old goat]

I love court. Some people stress out, I look forward to it.

ADA: Doctor, could the victim's wounds have been caused by this sharpened welding rod. (Shows me prison shiv).
Me: Yes.
ADA: Thank you doctor, that's all.
Defense attorney: could the wounds have been caused by something else.
Me: Yes
Defense attorney: Like what?
Me: anything sharp
Defense attorney: what do you mean by sharp?
Me: not you. [surprised I didn't get thrown into jail for contempt of court for that, but as the ADA told me before I testified, "This isn't Perry Mason. One no-account inmate stabbed another no-account inmate and no one cares."]

[Art Shirk]

Hey dog, I didn't ask myself to print a bunch of shit nor is my job in IT. If you don't work for my company and you don't suck at IT, you should apply for a job here and help them fix shit. Our IT team is pretty weak. Why do IT people always defend other IT departments at other companies? I know people at other companies who have a job similar to mine and I'm okay saying they suck at their jobs. Those are the people I pick up new clients from. So in closing, kiss my ass, kiss his ass, happy Hanukkah.

By the way, remember the time you almost sent a bunch of lap tops to an address in Boise that doesn't exist and you couldn't figure out how the scam worked and then I told you that the 14th floor address for the buyer of the building that only has 11 floors probably might be a good way to know someone is trying to trick you? Never mind, don't apply for an IT job at my employer. I'm not sure you could help. Maybe you've moved on from Best Buy so disregard all of this if you're kicking ass now. I hope you are. Not that there's anything wrong with working at Best Buy.

Here ya go stuck: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_o..._United_States

[TNKen]

Don't respond gets you a summons to show cause why you should not be held in contempt of court for failing to respond. Had a client that had an idiot for an attorney that did not respond to discovery. He was ordered to jail until the responses were provided. I shuttled him off to an out of state friend until we got it resolved.

You did the correct thing by getting the scope narrowed down.

If you go to a deposition, take an attorney. If your company is involved, they may go to court to get the scope and subject matter of the deposition identified and narrowed.

If you get called into a deposition, I have five rules.

1. Listen to the question. This means understand the question. Don't answer if you don't understand. Don't guess, don't answer compound or run on questions.
2. Answer the question which was asked. Refer to Rule 1. Then shut up.
3. Don't volunteer information---BIGGEST PROBLEM. Gets lots of folks in trouble and opens doors that don't need opened. Answer then shut up.
4. Don't guess. If you don't know the answer, say, "I don't know." If you sentence starts, I think, I don't recall but, It could have been... you are guessing. Guessing is similar to #3.
5. Tell the truth. Pretty obvious, but perjury is serious business.

Pay attention moments.
Putting words in your mouth. If the question starts, "would you agree with me that..." "What you meant to say is..." "So your answer was...." "Isn't it true that...." Your antenna should instantly go up because NOTHING GOOD HAPPENS when the question starts with these words. Be ready to say, NO that's not what I said, not true, no I don't agree.

The silence---Lawyer sits and stares at you after you do rule #2. He is baiting you into violating Rule #3. Response is "do you have another question?" Nothing more.

Always take the time to review the document you are being asked about. Make them sit there while you read it. Don't assume it is correct, accurate, hasn't been modified, or all the pages are present. Read it.

Someone told me they had 101 rules for depositions. Hell, I can't count that high. Do these five and you are golden.

I have testified and given an expert witness deposition. Neither was fun. Prepare, review the material and live by the five rules.

[Danno]

If you get called into a deposition, I have five rules.

1. Listen to the question. This means understand the question. Don't answer if you don't understand. Don't guess, don't answer compound or run on questions.
2. Answer the question which was asked. Refer to Rule 1. Then shut up.
3. Don't volunteer information---BIGGEST PROBLEM. Gets lots of folks in trouble and opens doors that don't need opened. Answer then shut up.
4. Don't guess. If you don't know the answer, say, "I don't know." If you sentence starts, I think, I don't recall but, It could have been... you are guessing. Guessing is similar to #3.
5. Tell the truth. Pretty obvious, but perjury is serious business.

Pay attention moments.
Putting words in your mouth. If the question starts, "would you agree with me that..." "What you meant to say is..." "So your answer was...." "Isn't it true that...." Your antenna should instantly go up because NOTHING GOOD HAPPENS when the question starts with these words. Be ready to say, NO that's not what I said, not true, no I don't agree.

The silence---Lawyer sits and stares at you after you do rule #2. He is baiting you into violating Rule #3. Response is "do you have another question?" Nothing more.

Always take the time to review the document you are being asked about. Make them sit there while you read it. Don't assume it is correct, accurate, hasn't been modified, or all the pages are present. Read it.

Someone told me they had 101 rules for depositions. Hell, I can't count that high. Do these five and you are golden.

I have testified and given an expert witness deposition. Neither was fun. Prepare, review the material and live by the five rules.

Spot on.

[fastfred]

Fastfred, which one are you ?

I'm on the right
ex sparky is on the left

you bitches is covered

[fastfred]

just want to maek sure i'm clear
civil shit is always fun and games
but if you find yourself on the criminal side of things make sure you don't fuck around


one time I supeoned the ceo of this company, it was funny as shit, I was my own lawyer for that one, I had five different lawyers up my ass I was wasting so much time, I kept delaying shit and playing all these retarted games with them, we get into court and the dumb fuck right out of law school lawyer just starts running his mouth, I had them so confused, judged just stopped him and said no, I was laughing so hard inside, we settled without admiting any wrong, they had some big word for it

people are so desperate in this world to one up each other and pretend that they are bigger and better and smarter than someone else that it's effortless to play into that

I love sitting there with a blank stare on my face, mouth open, acting like I'm stupid, much like when I played pozzo once

[Flyoverland Captive]

just want to maek sure i'm clear
civil shit is always fun and games
but if you find yourself on the criminal side of things make sure you don't fuck around


one time I supeoned the ceo of this company, it was funny as shit, I was my own lawyer for that one, I had five different lawyers up my ass I was wasting so much time, I kept delaying shit and playing all these retarted games with them, we get into court and the dumb fuck right out of law school lawyer just starts running his mouth, I had them so confused, judged just stopped him and said no, I was laughing so hard inside, we settled without admiting any wrong, they had some big word for it

people are so desperate in this world to one up each other and pretend that they are bigger and better and smarter than someone else that it's effortless to play into that

I love sitting there with a blank stare on my face, mouth open, acting like I'm stupid, much like when I played pozzo once

[byates1]

This is a helpful training video

i don't recall.

[reckless toboggan]

[byates1]

Just got my first subpoena. I'm not in trouble but someone I used to do some business with is. Do I redact all the profanity I used in the emails I'm printing or leave it for comic affect? Do they really need every email? Chances of being called to testified or maybe just deposition? The trial is in another state. I realize it's probably case specific...I'm trying to mentally prepare for what's next. I have to submit by the 14th. I'm not a fan of the defendant but I also don't have a dog in the fight at this point. Also not going to post any case details.

i would advise to never get involved w the legal system. oh, wait..( hope things go well for you)

[byates1]

[exsparky]

I loved Chester Ming's depo.

PS

I forgot to add...
good lawyers will try to wear you down and keep you there really late for a depo. They figure the longer they keep you there the less savvy you will be and that you will tell them what they want to hear so you can go. I figure I don't have a lawyer, so I can sit while they are on overtime. I really start to slow their questions down then.

I've also turned off the ac in the summer when they deposed me once in my office. I picked a conference room in the sun to speed the depo up, it must have been over 90 in there and the guy was wearing a sweater.

I've gotten paid $600 to REPRODUCE documents, I have already supplied once. IE signed contracts, checks, lien releases, title work and proof of payout. Don't go over $600 as they have to report it over that amount. They will bitch about it and threaten you but after a month or two they will pay you. I count those as wins too.

I have no experience in any criminal court stuff.

[Self Jupiter]

Chester sold meat. And weed.

[stuckathuntermtn]

Hey dog, I didn't ask myself to print a bunch of shit nor is my job in IT. If you don't work for my company and you don't suck at IT, you should apply for a job here and help them fix shit. Our IT team is pretty weak. Why do IT people always defend other IT departments at other companies? I know people at other companies who have a job similar to mine and I'm okay saying they suck at their jobs. Those are the people I pick up new clients from. So in closing, kiss my ass, kiss his ass, happy Hanukkah.

By the way, remember the time you almost sent a bunch of lap tops to an address in Boise that doesn't exist and you couldn't figure out how the scam worked and then I told you that the 14th floor address for the buyer of the building that only has 11 floors probably might be a good way to know someone is trying to trick you? Never mind, don't apply for an IT job at my employer. I'm not sure you could help. Maybe you've moved on from Best Buy so disregard all of this if you're kicking ass now. I hope you are. Not that there's anything wrong with working at Best Buy.

Hahaha.
I'd help you spruce up as in independent contractor, but that's it.
Why? Because I would straight up call everyone on their shit and then lawyer bitch would probably complain to her boss who would then complain to her boss's boss who would then complain to MY boss or maybe his boss first and the amount of shit rolling downhill = why stucky ekes out a marginal living through self employment and contract work through Work Market and Field Nation driving around and turning screws.


Ps, I didn't almost get scammed, I just wanted to know how the scam worked. Go read the thread.

Pps, stop waisting paper.

[stuckathuntermtn]

Or you could stop asking the IT department to print things for you so they can do their job.

[Cono Este]

just want to maek sure i'm clear
civil shit is always fun and games
but if you find yourself on the criminal side of things make sure you don't fuck around


one time I supeoned the ceo of this company, it was funny as shit, I was my own lawyer for that one, I had five different lawyers up my ass I was wasting so much time, I kept delaying shit and playing all these retarted games with them, we get into court and the dumb fuck right out of law school lawyer just starts running his mouth, I had them so confused, judged just stopped him and said no, I was laughing so hard inside, we settled without admiting any wrong, they had some big word for it

people are so desperate in this world to one up each other and pretend that they are bigger and better and smarter than someone else that it's effortless to play into that

I love sitting there with a blank stare on my face, mouth open, acting like I'm stupid, much like when I played pozzo once

I love it when people throw around the word “lawyer”, it shows their inexperience. 12 months, and 10k a month in legal bills changed me. I’m that guy with a paper judgement that’s not worth the paper it’s written on.

If someone sued me I’d fastfred it and laugh.


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