The Pending Divorce Thread

[mtngirl79]

Insecure women attract insecure men. I know this from personal experience. It's a fucked up co-dependence thing. I'm betting booner would like his wife even less if she had a healthy self esteem, although she probably wouldn't stick around anyways...

[booner]

Insecure women attract insecure men. I know this from personal experience. It's a fucked up co-dependence thing. I'm betting booner would like his wife even less if she had a healthy self esteem, although she probably wouldn't stick around anyways...

What else you got Dr Frasier Crane?


Sent from the other side

[sharcsplean]

If you can't stand you wife, and are only staying to protect your money - then you are being a crap parent. You don't think your kids are picking up on that? My parents did that - it sucked for EVERYONE. They even admit they should have divorced about 4 years earlier than they did. Man up and either go to therapy or get out - everyone will be happier.

[Timberridge]

Mtngirl has gone from wanting to off herself to giving relationship advice?

[guroo270]

Mtngirl has gone from wanting to off herself to giving relationship advice?

Does it mean that everyone here is insecure because she's here with us? I'm now insecure about that.

[Bromontana]

Does it mean that everyone here is insecure because she's here with us? I'm now insecure about that.

Yep, were all fucked. And its got nothing to do with generalized man-hate disorder.

[buttahflake]

Mtngirl has gone from wanting to off herself to giving relationship advice?

you're a dick
take a lap

[SB]

Mtngirl has gone from wanting to off herself to giving relationship advice?

The worm has turned.

[riser4]

And just next door in the inlaws thread booner said he had awesome inlaws. So where's the disconnect? Maybe booner needs to take a long, hard look in the mirror and stop being such a pussy. Lay off the alcohol and take a lap. ++++ Vibes man ++++

[philth]

Was she dumb and insecure when you married her?

Valid question by mtngirl no?

[booner]

Yes, she's the same person I married.

Actually, she's gotten better about her insecurity over the years I would say.

I was able to deal with it back then...wasn't really a big deal to me.It just gets more and more difficult to handle as time goes on.

Now that we're parents with all the things that come with that, decision making as a team and the conversations around that are a nightmare. I can't even disagree in the nicest way without her feeling like she's being attacked. Now I just do everything I can to avoid those conversations because, unless I completely agree with her, I know it's going to be a disaster.

And to all you Internet therapists...no it's not a result of my behavior. I certainly don't help sometimes, but she's always been this way. We were friends before we even dated, and she was always reacting like she was threatened in harmless debates where people disagreed with her.


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[guroo270]

That makes it sound like you made a big mistake. One that you might end up paying for, potentially rightfully so, if you'd like to make an exit.

[frorider]

Yes, she's the same person I married.

Actually, she's gotten better about her insecurity over the years I would say.

e

You feel like focusing on this somewhat positive aspect? Not gonna judge either way.

People with long-term self esteem issues can pull out of it. I've seen people at work suddenly get confident after being told for years that they were more competent than they thought they were. Where in her life does she get objective feedback telling her she's mostly got her shit together? Or do you think she's a total idiot who will never get the type of validation that could further improve her self esteem?

The parenting discussion/argument issue sounds more like a mechanical issue though, possibly. A decent counselor could walk u guys through a recent argument but in a way that doesn't escalate. If a year from now 50% of those parenting or other co-decision discussions went sorta well, would that be enough for you?

[MagnificentUnicorn]

Yes, she's the same person I married.

Actually, she's gotten better about her insecurity over the years I would say.

And to all you Internet therapists...no it's not a result of my behavior. I certainly don't help sometimes, but she's always been this way. We were friends before we even dated, and she was always reacting like she was threatened in harmless debates where people disagreed with her.


Sent from the other side

Now you sound like a dumb ass. Why'd you marry her?

Every time I here someone say that their relationship trouble is mostly or all the other person's fault I know they're not very good at introspection. Sure my ex had problems but I did a lot to make it worse and stayed in the marriage way too long and those are my issues not hers.

If you were to decide to get a divorce don't be a dick and don't be bitter, treat her like a human being.

[MagnificentUnicorn]

That's the good news, but the $2k / month I gave for child support never got to the kids sadly.

Child support is for the custodial spouse to maintain a household and lifestyle that the children were accustomed to before the divorce, much like alimony or maintenance. It's based off the combined net of the couple usually and then apportioned according to the ratio of who earns more or less. It sound like your ex made less than you and/or you live in a state without alimony or maintenance.

Child support isn't supposed to be given directly to the children it's to help the custodial parent support the children. When people have attitudes like "none of the money get's to the kids" we wind up with child support registries and dead beat dad laws.

When I got divorced I willingly paid more alimony instead of a large amount of child support. Alimony is a tax deduction for me and a income for her. Increasing her income lessens my child support burden.

The key to a happy divorce is to be smart, thorough and patient as well as being fair, not bitter and putting your emotions in a box.

[glademaster]

Why did you marry this woman knowing about her insecurities, and more importantly, why in god's name did you decide to procreate with her? Before you get divorced, off your spawn so we don't have to deal with any more resource suckers down the line. It's the only way to make this situation right.

[flatlander#2]

Hmmm...Let's think how this will play out. You'll go through with the divorce and she'll realize all this time, even when you were friends dating, that you've been making her feel insecure, and well dumb. By the way if someone called my daughter dumb, I'd hand him his ass. You'll be all stoked about the divorce, go on a porn rampage, be all hells yeah now I'll finally slay some hot puss, but the hot puss they can smell crazy desperate old guy a mile away and will stay the same. You'll end up in bars trying to hit on the strange and desperate, internet date, maybe you'll luck out and find some damaged by some other dude crazy chick who is DTF crazy, your friends will think holy shit she's fucking nuts but you "seem" happy with her, she'll steal shit, lie, fuck other dudes and you'll wonder wow all women must be fucking crazy. Your ex will lift herself up and take care of herself-get boned a shit ton by random dudes when you have the kids for the weekend, find somebody that has probably been working a shit ton building a career, never had time to find a girl, will treat your kids like gold. They'll think man he's so much nicer to us than Dad who always seems angry and cheap. This guy will bring out new and amazing things in your ex, she'll be happy and when you meet at a pre arranged place to do the kid exchange she'll say just try to be happy, which will make you pissed even more and you'll treat even more women/people like shit.

She deserves better. Lord knows the kids deserve better. Get your shit together, be a man not a boy. Stop whacking off, stop calling anybody dumb, do the things that people in successful relationships do, not people in relationships that fail do. Is this how your Dad treated your Mom? Or how your daughters husband will treat her?

And Ice will get caught, go to the joint and be trying to fit in by regaling the brothers with stories, trying to keep on the good side of the rapers. He'll be telling a highlarryus yarn about flicking a match end in some dudes ear when a huge guy will stand up and say I've been deaf in this ear ever since that happened, it's how people sneak up and rape me in here.

[danmelon]

Why did you marry this woman knowing about her insecurities, and more importantly, why in god's name did you decide to procreate with her? Before you get divorced, off your spawn so we don't have to deal with any more resource suckers down the line. It's the only way to make this situation right.

naked pics of wife would most definitely clear up these questions.

[Danno]

Hmmm...Let's think how this will play out. You'll go through with the divorce and she'll realize all this time, even when you were friends dating, that you've been making her feel insecure, and well dumb. By the way if someone called my daughter dumb, I'd hand him his ass. You'll be all stoked about the divorce, go on a porn rampage, be all hells yeah now I'll finally slay some hot puss, but the hot puss they can smell crazy desperate old guy a mile away and will stay the same. You'll end up in bars trying to hit on the strange and desperate, internet date, maybe you'll luck out and find some damaged by some other dude crazy chick who is DTF crazy, your friends will think holy shit she's fucking nuts but you "seem" happy with her, she'll steal shit, lie, fuck other dudes and you'll wonder wow all women must be fucking crazy. Your ex will lift herself up and take care of herself-get boned a shit ton by random dudes when you have the kids for the weekend, find somebody that has probably been working a shit ton building a career, never had time to find a girl, will treat your kids like gold. They'll think man he's so much nicer to us than Dad who always seems angry and cheap. This guy will bring out new and amazing things in your ex, she'll be happy and when you meet at a pre arranged place to do the kid exchange she'll say just try to be happy, which will make you pissed even more and you'll treat even more women/people like shit.

She deserves better. Lord knows the kids deserve better. Get your shit together, be a man not a boy. Stop whacking off, stop calling anybody dumb, do the things that people in successful relationships do, not people in relationships that fail do. Is this how your Dad treated your Mom? Or how your daughters husband will treat her?

And Ice will get caught, go to the joint and be trying to fit in by regaling the brothers with stories, trying to keep on the good side of the rapers. He'll be telling a highlarryus yarn about flicking a match end in some dudes ear when a huge guy will stand up and say I've been deaf in this ear ever since that happened, it's how people sneak up and rape me in here.

well done

[DBdude]

Booner is venting. Marriage is tough.

[babybear]

I think Flatlander is probably spot on with what the future holds- worse craziness

I don't venture into the p0rn thread here so miss learning about all your little personalities in that dept. p0rn is great to a point but if that's what yer focusing on then you're missing out on the real life experiences.

As they say- maybe try watering yer own lawn? Good luck!

[SB]

this place is moar fkd up than I remembers

[stuckathuntermtn]

DasBlunt giving out marriage advice is like....well it's like DasBlunt giving out marriage advice. I don't think it really compares to anything else.
Is this just a 7 year itch thing, or do you really think you fell out of love? If it's the latter, the only thing I could offer is a funny video.

Dumb and insecure women are such a turnoff.

[SB]

naked pics of wife would most definitely clear up these questions.

yes they wood

[booner]

You guys are really bringing it...well done.


I hate to spoil ALL the fun, but let's not forget...this is just talk...on the Internet

I can't reply to all this wonderful and accurate dissection, but most of you are jumping to some fantastic conclusions! I can't blame you with the ammo I provided, but it's pretty comical to read what some people think the reality is.

I was pretty fired up when I originally posted because I was, once again, dealing with unnecessary drama due to her insecurity.

I did the right thing and walked away from the situation without putting her down or yelling. I should have yelled at her...she certainly deserved it, but that would have made things worse, and I would have become the bad guy.



Now, real talk...

It's just getting more and more difficult to deal with her shit. I don't treat her bad or fight in front of the kids. We actually hardly ever fight. I'm just finding myself regularly fighting the urge to blow up at her and tell her to knock her shit off. I'm not sure I can do it forever.

Most of my trolling is exaggerated bs...Sorry to ruin the fun. But if you can't figure THAT out, you're lost. I like to spark debate sometimes while sacrificing a bit of reality. I do love the porn though...Not faking that

It's more about the thoughts I have of where things might be headed, not where they are.

And for the record, the poor girl takes enough of the D as it is...Not sure it's in her best interest to get punished anymore than she already does. Although I do like the idea.


I agree that naked pics are going to help everyone fully understand the situation. I'm going to let her know that I started a thread about how I want to leave her cause she's dumb, and that naked pics are in order so the random Internet peeps can help me find the right path.

I'll make sure I have her spread her ass real wide so we can debate whether or not she's due for a bleaching.









Sent from the other side