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Thread: My neighbor got a rooster.
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05-30-2007, 02:47 PM #1
My neighbor got a rooster.
In town.
Until recently, they had a chicken. It's name was Penpen, and she slept on their dresser. It used to roam around the yard, the street, sometimess crossing over to its fate and our dog in our front yard.
My wife and I have been talking about how the thing would surely be killed soon, by a dog, cat, osprey (we are right by the river), or car. Well, it happened. We don't know the full story yet, but in any case, the neighbors have already "found" a new "stray" chicken on the soccer field down the street, brought him home, and discovered the first night that it's actually a rooster.
Damn thing is making a hell of a racket right now, but we haven't heard him in the morning yet. Neighbors claim they will keep him inside in the morning, but still.
What the fuck.
If the thing wanders into our yard or the street immediately in front of our yard, and our dog kills it, are we going to be out $15 for a new chicken? Or is it just 'tough shit, morons'?
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05-30-2007, 02:50 PM #2....................
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Posts
- 5,518
What's the difference between a rooster and a nymphomaniac?
A rooster says "Cockadoodledoo!"
A nymphomaniac says "Any cock'll do!"
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05-30-2007, 02:52 PM #3
Depending on your municipality that meay not be an allowable pet. Barnyard animals have been banned in many towns.
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05-30-2007, 02:53 PM #4
Get with the program and call it what it is - COCK !
that way, your conversations are more interesting.
For example, you can tell your neighbor:
"Keep your cock inside or I'll cut its head off !". . .
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05-30-2007, 02:55 PM #5Registered User
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- Oct 2003
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- 8,887
Chickens are 40,000 rupiah. Never pay more than 40,000 rupiah when you runover a chicken.
Elvis has left the building
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05-30-2007, 02:58 PM #6Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.
Patterson Hood of the DBT's
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05-30-2007, 02:59 PM #7
I see dinner in your future.
The only thing worse than the feeling that you are going to die is the realization that you probably won't.
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05-30-2007, 03:00 PM #8
You could roll with it and introduce their cock to this guy:
I still call it The Jake.
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05-30-2007, 03:01 PM #9
Yeah, you could have some fun with that...
"Can I pet and/or hold your cock?"
"Is your cock friendly or is he a mean pecker?"
"My what a handsome cock you have!"
"What time does your cock normally rise in the morning?"
Having a cock as a house pet is just gross. Chicken shit is some of the most vile poo out there and I doubt you can house train your average cock. Ecspecially if he is already a large, adult cock.
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05-30-2007, 03:04 PM #10
This cock is definitely not large. He is smaller than the chicken.
And yeah, the neighbor even told me when we moved in that he was breaking the law. They are nice people, just a tad strange.
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05-30-2007, 03:04 PM #11
time to go shotgun shopping!!!
More fucked up than a cricket in a hubcap
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05-30-2007, 03:06 PM #12
Classic Coq Au Vin Recipe courtesy Emeril Lagasse, 2003
10 slices bacon, sliced into 1/2-inch pieces
2 chickens, about 3 1/2 to 4 pounds, quartered, rinsed and patted dry
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 onion, finely chopped
20 small pearl onions, peeled
1/2 cup minced shallots (2 large shallots)
1 head garlic, cloves separated and peeled
1 pound button mushrooms, wiped clean and halved or quartered if large (should match size of onions)
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons tomato paste
3 cups full-bodied dry red wine, such as Pinot Noir or Cotes-du-Rhone
1 1/2 cups rich chicken stock
6 sprigs fresh thyme or 1 teaspoon dried thyme
1 bay leaf
Braised Leeks, recipe follows
Egg noodles, accompaniment
2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley leaves
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
In a large, heavy Dutch oven over high heat fry the bacon until crisp and all of the fat is rendered. Using a slotted spoon, transfer the crisp bacon bits to paper towels to drain. Reserve.
Season the chicken pieces with the salt and pepper. Brown the chicken pieces in the hot bacon fat, working in batches, if necessary, and turning to ensure even cooking. Transfer the chicken pieces to a large plate or bowl and set aside. Remove some of the bacon fat, leaving about 4 tablespoons in the Dutch oven. Reduce the heat to medium-high and add the chopped onion, pearl onions, shallots and garlic cloves to the Dutch oven and cook until soft, about 4 minutes.
Add the mushrooms and cook for 5 minutes longer, or until they've released most of their liquid and have begun to brown. Add the flour and tomato paste and cook, stirring constantly, for 1 minute. Slowly add the wine and stock, stirring constantly. Add the thyme, bay leaf, reserved bacon and chicken. Bring liquid to a boil. Cover the pot, place in the oven and cook for about 1 1/2 hours, or until the chicken is very tender. Transfer the chicken pieces to a serving dish and cover loosely to keep warm. Return pot to medium-low heat. Skim any fat from the surface of the cooking liquid and increase the heat to medium-high. Cook until the sauce has thickened slightly and coats the back of a spoon, about 15 to 20 minutes. Taste and adjust the seasoning if necessary. Return the chicken to the Dutch oven and cook for a few minutes to heat through, then serve.
Serve with egg noodles and braised leeks. Garnish with the chopped parsley.
*This dish may be prepared 1 or 2 days in advance and then reheated slowly just before serving.
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05-30-2007, 03:09 PM #13
Beat me to the coq au vin.
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05-30-2007, 03:09 PM #14
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05-30-2007, 03:12 PM #15
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05-30-2007, 03:19 PM #16
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09-06-2019, 10:45 AM #17
and the lesson is.... if you have vascular vulnerabilities don't get a rooster:
A woman was pecked to death by a rooster, pathologists say“When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis
Kindness is a bridge between all people
Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism
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09-06-2019, 10:54 AM #18Funky But Chic
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I wonder how Rootskier's pecker is doing these days.
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09-06-2019, 12:30 PM #19
Man I forgot about this thread. I just had to think hard about what house we were living in at the time. I have no real recollection of any of that.
More recently, and in a totally different town, our neighbor-across-the-fence had a bunch of chickens and ducks. Shit got weird. First, one of the ducks hopped over the fence and my in-laws' golden retriever disemboweled it. It was flapping around spurting blood. We had to kill it with a shovel. I told my wife to let dead ducks lie, but did she? Fuck no, she had to tell Craig that his fucking duck [name forthcoming when I remember it, it will really add to the story edit: the duck's name was Frisbee] was dead inside a brown paper bag in our garbage can. He cried his ass off and then came and got the dismembered duck. ?????????? I hope he hate that little shit.
Soon after, all the ducks were gone. After about 6 beers one night, I got real brave and asked him why. Turned out the ducks started gang-raping the chickens to death, which is actually a common duck thing. https://nypost.com/2017/05/06/dont-b...ping-monsters/
Backyard poultry. Never a dull moment.Last edited by RootSkier; 09-06-2019 at 12:57 PM.
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09-06-2019, 12:36 PM #20
Our neighbors kids have a couple as pets.. Totally illegal within city limits. Hens no problem, roosters a hard no according to the city..
Get Ruby
Side note, found a bunch of bloody feathers near our back fence a few months ago. Our dog claims to have no idea what happened there LOL..Go that way really REALLY fast. If something gets in your way, TURN!
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09-06-2019, 12:39 PM #21Banned
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- Oct 2003
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- In Your Wife
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- 8,291
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09-06-2019, 12:48 PM #22
We used to have a large fake lake next to a hotel I worked at. We had ducks. Guests thought they were so precious until a male would grab a female and hold her head under water while he hammered away, sometimes until she was dead.
less cute.
Also, Seagulls will eat ducklings FYI and a female duck defending said ducklings from a seagull is a site to behold.
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09-06-2019, 01:07 PM #23
My neighbors did the same thing and from the first day it crowed all day about every 1/2 hours. Then when I tried to walk my dog by the damn cock strutted right up and started clawing at the sidewalk and fronting like he wanted a fight. I called it in to the police. Since roosters are against ordinance they got talked to. Police told me that my neighbors said they'd rather just eat it for dinner than get rid of it and I haven't heard another rooster.
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09-06-2019, 01:36 PM #24
That was funny. Thanks I needed a good laugh. ^^^
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09-06-2019, 01:38 PM #25
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