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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    264

    The Caddyshack quote thread...

    Let's hear 'em. The more obscure the better. I'll start...

    "I feel like a hundred dollars."

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    264
    It's easy to grin
    when your ship comes in
    and you've got the stock market beat.

    But the man worthwhile
    is the man who can smile
    when his pants are too tight in the seat.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    bushwood
    Posts
    663
    You two look like a couple of boobies.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Huh?
    Posts
    10,938
    So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one -- big hitter, the Lama -- long, into a ten-thousand foot crevice, right at the base of this glacier. And do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga...gunga -- gunga galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consiousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
    "I knew in an instant that the three dollars I had spent on wine would not go to waste."

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    land of the free
    Posts
    8,254
    "You musta been something before electricity"

    "You wanna make $14 the hard way?"

    "[cough cough] what kind of shit is this?
    Its the best, man - I got it from a Negro - you're probably so high already you don't even know it"
    “Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.”
    Hunter S. Thompson

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    264
    Carl Spackler: "License to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. Man, free to kill gophers at will. To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote."
    Last edited by MapleSyrup; 04-22-2007 at 09:12 PM.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    264
    "What are you doing on Saturday, Danny?"
    "Nothing, sir."
    "Great! How would you like to mow my lawn?"
    Last edited by MapleSyrup; 04-21-2007 at 11:58 PM.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    18,113
    That's a peach, hon.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    264
    Honey, would you loofah my stretchmarks?

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    on the edge
    Posts
    5,788
    "My father...my father never liked you"

    "With my lips?"
    If it's green, smoke it...if it's pink, poke it

    BUY THESE------> 193 iM 103 - $50 https://www.tetongravity.com/forums/s...d.php?t=179797

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    264

    Talking

    "This is good stuff. I got it from a Negro. You're probably high already and you don't even know it..."

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Wooded enclave
    Posts
    1,796
    You take drugs Danny?

    Everyday.

    Good! So what's the problem?
    Last edited by milton; 04-22-2007 at 07:29 AM.
    To the Thingmajigger!

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    The land of Genesee Cream Ale and homemade pierogies!
    Posts
    1,672
    Al Czervik (Rodney Dangerfield), to Wang, the oriental guy who's taking pictures of everything: "I think this place is restricted Wang, so don't tell 'em your Jewish, okay?" Link

    Ted Knight: You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I mean, he's been club champion for three years running and I'm no slouch myself.
    Chevy Chase: Don't sell yourself short, judge. You're a tremendous slouch.

    Judge Smails: Oh, Porterhouse! Look at the wax build-up on those shoes! This is fine leather! I want that wax stripped off! I want them creamed and buffed with a fine chamois. And I want them now! Chop chop!
    You then see Porterhouse mumbling something, holding the shoes are under a spinning shop grinder with smoke coming off them, and pieces flying everywhere.
    “The best argument in favour of a 90% tax rate on the rich is a five-minute chat with the average rich person.”

    - Winston Churchill, paraphrased.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Jagoff City
    Posts
    993
    "I was born, to lick your face."
    Courage + believe = life. Life is not about how many breaths you take. It's what you do with those breaths

  15. #15
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    sky high, Front Range
    Posts
    1,031
    This place got a pool?


    Pool and a pond... Pond be good for you.
    A gay-rage full of toys. You can guess em.

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    in the brew room
    Posts
    1,728
    Quote Originally Posted by fondigley View Post
    This place got a pool?


    Pool and a pond... Pond be good for you.
    my favorite!

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    TGR Forum
    Posts
    528
    Be the ball Danny.

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    pugski.com
    Posts
    3,201
    Judge Smails:How do you measure yourself against other golfers?

    Ty: By height
    Click. Point. Chute.

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    TGR Forum
    Posts
    528
    Hey you scratched my anchor!

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    264
    "I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it. I felt I owed it to them."

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Up the Canyon
    Posts
    1,889
    Maggie: Yeah? Well tanks fer nuttin Noonan!
    Bush got C's.... Obama probably failed lunch

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Up the Canyon
    Posts
    1,889
    "$50 bucks says the Smails kid picks his nose"
    Bush got C's.... Obama probably failed lunch

  23. #23
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    1,322
    "I almost got head from Amelia Earhart!"

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    pugski.com
    Posts
    3,201
    Pick that wrapper up...
    Click. Point. Chute.

  25. #25
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Up the Canyon
    Posts
    1,889
    "People dont say that about you Carl, as far as you know."
    Bush got C's.... Obama probably failed lunch

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