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  1. #51
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    263
    "I have to laugh, because I've outsmarted even myself. My enemy, my foe, is an animal. In order to conquer the animal, I have to learn to think like an animal. And, whenever possible, to look like one. I've gotta get inside this guy's pelt and crawl around for a few days. Who's the gopher's ally. His friends. The harmless squirrel and the friendly rabbit."

    Last edited by MapleSyrup; 04-27-2007 at 12:32 AM.

  2. #52
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Cambridge
    Posts
    352
    "Whats that sign say?"
    "No bare feet."
    "Whats that sign say?"
    "No fighting!"


    "You owe me one gumball machine"



    "So what? So lets dance!"
    "My geode must be acknowledged"

  3. #53
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Trench-Town U.S.A.
    Posts
    742
    "Thank you very little"
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    "Must be a nice change from dreary old Manhattan"
    "Yes, I was getting tired of having fun all the time."
    "Why do I always get more kisses on powder days?" -my wife

  4. #54
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    263
    [Dangerfield]"I shoulda stayed home and played with myself!"[/Dangerfield]

  5. #55
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    slc
    Posts
    17,889
    I was bored flipping through the digi cable guide the other day when I saw Caddyshack was on HBO. I flipped to it only to find out that it was actually Caddyshack 2, I was so very, very angry.

  6. #56
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    SF
    Posts
    349
    How about a Fresca?
    Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.

  7. #57
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Up the Canyon
    Posts
    1,876
    Lacey: "I think I've got enougth butter, thanks"...
    Bush got C's.... Obama probably failed lunch

  8. #58
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Edwards
    Posts
    278
    Lacey: Oh, you were in the war?
    Ty: (pats leg and hobbles) Nope, homo.

    That one slays me every time I see it.

  9. #59
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    208 State
    Posts
    2,577
    Danny to Lacey: "I just wanted to let you know that because of this you don't have to stop seeing other people"

  10. #60
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    263
    Ty: "Me winning isn't important, you do!"

    Noonan: "Nice grammar"

  11. #61
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Colorado Springs, CO
    Posts
    6
    Carl: This crowd has gone deadly silent, a Cinderella story outta nowhere. Former greenskeeper and now about to become the masters champion.

  12. #62
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Posts
    2,931
    The normally reserved Augusta crowd, going wild...

    I can't believe we made it to pg. 3 before Carl's announcing bit was mentioned!

  13. #63
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    27,308
    "Hey, everybody! We're all gonna get laid!"

  14. #64
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    263
    "I've stopped talking... Not talking now"

  15. #65
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    CO
    Posts
    283
    "Oh, yes... well... Just snake a tube down her throat and I'll be there in 4 or 5 hours." - Dr. Beeper.

  16. #66
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Hokkaido
    Posts
    1,301
    Judge Smails: You should play with us sometime. Dr. Beeper's been club champion three years running and I'm no slouch myself.
    Ty Webb: Don't sell yourself short, Judge. You're a tremendous slouch.


    Judge Smails: Ty, your father and I, we prepped together, we went to college together. We went to war together. We built Bushwwod. Some people just don't belong.
    Ty Webb: Let's make it forty thousand. (Judge grins. Ty chuckles and draws the judge close to share a secret.) My dad... never liked you.


    Carl Spackler: I tell you what to do about Smails. You just cut the hamstring a little. He'll stand on his back foot and slice everything into the woods. He'll give up the game.


    Carl Spackler: It's not my fault nobody can understand you, you fuzzy foreigner.


    Lacey Underall: You wanna tie me up with some of your ties, Ty?


    Al Czervik: Golf courses and cemetaries the biggest wastes of prime real estate. Only reason I'm here is cause I might buy this dump.


    Judge Smails: I owe you nothing.
    Al Czervik: Oh yeah? I thought so. Moose! Rocco! Help the judge find his checkbook!


    and it's not pick up that wrapper, it's...
    "PICK UP THAT BLOOD!"

    I boiled my thermometer, and sure enough, this spot, which purported to be two thousand feet higher than the locality of the hotel, turned out to be nine thousand feet LOWER. Thus the fact was clearly demonstrated that, ABOVE A CERTAIN POINT, THE HIGHER A POINT SEEMS TO BE, THE LOWER IT ACTUALLY IS. Our ascent itself was a great achievement, but this contribution to science was an inconceivably greater matter.

    --MT--

  17. #67
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    27,308
    Quote Originally Posted by telepariah View Post
    J
    and it's not pick up that wrapper, it's...
    "PICK UP THAT BLOOD!"
    No, Lou says both.

    "you want to be replaced by golf carts, keep it up."

  18. #68
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Hokkaido
    Posts
    1,301
    I believe you are correct, sir.

    Nunzio: How was it?
    Maggie: How was what?
    Nunzio: It couldn't have been that good then.

    I boiled my thermometer, and sure enough, this spot, which purported to be two thousand feet higher than the locality of the hotel, turned out to be nine thousand feet LOWER. Thus the fact was clearly demonstrated that, ABOVE A CERTAIN POINT, THE HIGHER A POINT SEEMS TO BE, THE LOWER IT ACTUALLY IS. Our ascent itself was a great achievement, but this contribution to science was an inconceivably greater matter.

    --MT--

  19. #69
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    263
    BUMP... (We've got so many more left!)

    "Look at this! This is the worst hat I ever saw! I bet if you buy a hat like this you get a free bowl of soup!

    But it looks good on you though."

    ...

    "HEY WHITEY, WHERE'S YOUR HAT?"

  20. #70
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    1,324
    Carl to Ty: Well, I got a lot of stuff on order. You know... credit trouble.

  21. #71
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    crown of the continent
    Posts
    13,947
    It's good to be good Danny-
    Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
    And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
    It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
    and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.

    Patterson Hood of the DBT's

  22. #72
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    bozone
    Posts
    945
    spalding, get your foot off the boat!

  23. #73
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    NH
    Posts
    744
    The Zen philosopher Basho once said ‘A flute with no holes is not a flute. A donut with no hole is a Danish.’ Funny guy.
    There's a lot to be said for nowhere.

  24. #74
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Up the Canyon
    Posts
    1,876
    Lacy to Ty: "I tried to look you up in the phone book but I couldn't find a listing for Mr. Wonderful."

    Ty: "Really? What spelling did you use?"
    Bush got C's.... Obama probably failed lunch

  25. #75
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Up the Canyon
    Posts
    1,876
    Carl holding up the Baby Ruth in the pool- "Found it!"

    "Its no big deal."
    Bush got C's.... Obama probably failed lunch

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