No Thanks Capital One

[Obstruction]

It's not a clever or original trick but I'm tired of shredding all the shit they send me and having to haul it to the dump.

So every time Capital One sends me a credit card app and asks me to respond I write "no thanks" on it with a sharpie and cram it into the postage paid response envelope with all of the other crap they send.

Then I dream of a grass roots movement starting (cue up Alice's Restuarant) and go on to some other childish crap with which to entertain myself.

[wi3dzmin]

I for one am a big fan of the following (Maddox)

[vinzclortho]

Andy Rooney has been advocating doing exactly that move for years, send companies back their junk mail with "not interested" on it. The way he explains it, it ends up costing them more money...this and that. he's also totally fucking insane and from what I can tell, bent on world domination and really focused on how much coffee is in a pound....no idea where I'm going with this. I'm gonna tap out and let this go.

[iceman]

I for one am a big fan of the following (Maddox)

You can actually do better than that. Return postage is guaranteed by the company so you can tape that envelope to anything (a cinder block, a brick, a big-ass rock) and it will be delivered to the company - at the first-class mail rate per ounce it weighs. Send 'em a 20-pound cinder block and it'll cost 'em like a hundred dollars.

[Obstruction]

Andy Rooney has been advocating doing exactly that move for years, send companies back their junk mail with "not interested" on it. The way he explains it, it ends up costing them more money...this and that. he's also totally fucking insane and from what I can tell, bent on world domination and really focused on how much coffee is in a pound....no idea where I'm going with this. I'm gonna tap out and let this go.

That explains it! That crazy old bushy eyebrowed prick has subliminally weaseled his way into the soft tissue between my ears (and there is a surfeit o' that).

[smalls]

You can actually do better than that. Return postage is guaranteed by the company so you can tape that envelope to anything (a cinder block, a brick, a big-ass rock) and it will be delivered to the company - at the first-class mail rate per ounce it weighs. Send 'em a 20-pound cinder block and it'll cost 'em like a hundred dollars.

unfortunately, that's no longer true. used to be a good trick though. this change is codified in Rule 917.243(b) in the Domestic Mail Manual: 'When a business reply card is “improperly used as a label”— such as being affixed to a brick—the package may be treated as “waste” and not delivered, which means no charge to the recipient.'

[FNG]

So...how many ball bearings can one fit into a pre-paid envelope?

[mc_roon]

So...how many ball bearings can one fit into a pre-paid envelope?

or how many high power magnets

[iceman]

unfortunately, that's no longer true. used to be a good trick though. this change is codified in Rule 917.243(b) in the Domestic Mail Manual: 'When a business reply card is “improperly used as a label”— such as being affixed to a brick—the package may be treated as “waste” and not delivered, which means no charge to the recipient.'

Dang.

The man keeping us down again, I shouldn't be surprised.

[splat]

It's not a clever or original trick but I'm tired of shredding all the shit they send me and having to haul it to the dump.

So every time Capital One sends me a credit card app and asks me to respond I write "no thanks" on it with a sharpie and cram it into the postage paid response envelope with all of the other crap they send.

Then I dream of a grass roots movement starting (cue up Alice's Restuarant) and go on to some other childish crap with which to entertain myself.

I bet a dog turd would fit nicely in those envelopes - at least Otis The Dog's would.

[Obstruction]

I bet a dog turd would fit nicely in those envelopes - at least Otis The Dog's would.

Otis must have outstanding aim if he can drop a duece in a postage paid response envelope!

[atomicboy]

So...how many ball bearings can one fit into a pre-paid envelope?

Hey! It's all ball bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that Fetzer valve with some 3-in-1 oil and some gauze pads. And I'm gonna need 'bout ten quarts of anti-freeze, preferably Prestone. No, no make that Quaker State.

[Blatant]

You can actually do better than that. Return postage is guaranteed by the company so you can tape that envelope to anything (a cinder block, a brick, a big-ass rock) and it will be delivered to the company - at the first-class mail rate per ounce it weighs. Send 'em a 20-pound cinder block and it'll cost 'em like a hundred dollars.

this is funny. Imagine rolling into the post office with a brick or a box of dirt with that silly envelope they send you drunkenly taped to the box.

[bc]

They should still deliver something reasonable. Some of the mail-in film-->digital places tell you to just tape the return postage guaranteed card to a package to sent it to 'em... So maybe a brick won't do, but how about a phone book??

[iceman]

I think they might still deliver something that they can't tell what it is, like a sealed cardboard box with bricks inside, not sure though.