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  1. 09-16-2005, 12:07 PM #1
    The Reverend Floater's Avatar
    The Reverend Floater
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    Angry The Hits Just Keep Comin'!

    So for those of you who were enjoying my onslaught of misery here http://www.tetongravity.com/forums/s...ad.php?t=34725 , it just got even more fucked.

    Turns out I don't have a broken foot. I have gout. I am 28 and I have a disease that I thought was reserved for old ladies with goiters and diapers. It's a life-long arthretic condition that can usually be controlled by lessening the body's production of uric acid. The kicker? Gout is often the byproduct of people who drink too much or eat too much red meat. I don't eat red meat and I quit drinking. This is the thank you, apparently.

    To all of you who thought I was cool for going sober: You're dead wrong. I am the gout man. I have gout. I am gout. Gout is me.

    Fuck it. I'm going to eat a double cheese burger, rare, then I'm going drinking Rev-style and I'll show this gout who his daddy is!
    "All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
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  2. 09-16-2005, 12:08 PM #2
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    damn,

    when it rains it pours man

    For sure, you have to be lost to find a place that can't be found, elseways everyone would know where it was
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  3. 09-16-2005, 12:11 PM #3
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    Do it.

    Kick that gout right in the nuts.
    Buy nice things here.
    www.motorcityglassworks.com
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  4. 09-16-2005, 12:11 PM #4
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    The real question is: do chicks dig gout?

    Bacchus has had his revenge. Perhaps he'll lay off the Norns now.
    Merde De Glace On the Freak When Ski
    >>>200 cm Black Bamboo Sidewalled DPS Lotus 120 : Best Skis Ever <<<
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  5. 09-16-2005, 12:13 PM #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by marvinparanoid
    damn R,
    nothing to say but damn.
    didnt you joke about gout in the basin lot telling me about all your feet/toe probs?

    any way to fight this?
    aside from killing it with wisky that is.

    oh and be careful, as I learned the hard way, when you go on the wagon for a while, then go out and drink like you used to, you will get blackout walking fucked up.
    FYI
    IFTLOPPS

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  6. 09-16-2005, 12:15 PM #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Reverend Floater
    Fuck it. I'm going to eat a double cheese burger, rare, then I'm going drinking Rev-style and I'll show this gout who his daddy is!
    I've had the South American flu all week, drank some Jameson last night, feeling better today. Coincidence?

    And you might want to reconsider that double cheese rare. This is ground beef we're talking about.

    Seriously though, I know things will turn around soon. I've had bad runs like that in the past. They always seem to turn around for the better. In the meantime...uhhhh...enjoy the ride.
    Last edited by Arty50; 09-16-2005 at 12:18 PM.
    "I knew in an instant that the three dollars I had spent on wine would not go to waste."
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  7. 09-16-2005, 12:20 PM #7
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    Take the army cure: only LSD for amusement.
    Merde De Glace On the Freak When Ski
    >>>200 cm Black Bamboo Sidewalled DPS Lotus 120 : Best Skis Ever <<<
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  8. 09-16-2005, 12:20 PM #8
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    My Grandpa had gout. Blamed it on Port and red meat (he was a butcher). Hope you can keep that uric acid down (???)

    edg
    Do you realize that you've just posted an admission of ignorance so breathtaking that it disqualifies you from commenting on any political or economic threads from here on out?
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  9. 09-16-2005, 12:21 PM #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Buster Highmen
    Take the army cure: only LSD for amusement.
    But then I'll look in the mirror and I will have a goiter, among other things like horns and third eyes!
    "All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
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  10. 09-16-2005, 12:21 PM #10
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    Wow that sucks.

    Three words for you:

    Grumpy's, Lefty's, Casino.

    ......and the beer bong is fully operational.
    "I don't feel tardy"
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  11. 09-16-2005, 12:22 PM #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by jimmy page
    Wow that sucks.

    Three words for you:

    Grumpy's, Lefty's, Casino.

    ......and the beer bong is fully operational.
    Heh. I saw Katherine this morning and she blamed you for the beer bonging on Saturday. It was pretty funny.
    "All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
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  12. 09-16-2005, 12:24 PM #12
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    She can blame whoever she wants, but she is the one who told me to go get it from my house.

    But seriously, Get better so that I have someone to ski with this winter.
    "I don't feel tardy"
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  13. 09-16-2005, 12:25 PM #13
    iceman
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    I've had a couple of gout attacks, although I don't have a chronic case and haven't had it for a few years. Drink lots of water, that will help you piss out the uric acid. Get Indocin, which works wonders - at the cost (for me at least) of feeling literally like I had been stabbed in the stomach.Others report no side efeects from Indocin, so I dunno. Good luck with it, it can be managed.
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  14. 09-16-2005, 12:31 PM #14
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    From WebMD

    Gout was once thought to be due to drinking too much alcohol and eating too many rich foods. Although eating certain foods and drinking alcohol may trigger a rise in the level of uric acid in the body, these habits may not by themselves cause gout. Gout is most often caused by an overproduction of uric acid (due to metabolism problems) or decreased elimination of uric acid by the kidneys.


    Maybe get the thyroid checked out?

    Edit: Since my computer crashed my sound hasn't been working. With the release of Red v Blue Episode 60 I have been shit out of luck.

    Since the original edit I have also had my lunch interupted by bible thumpers.
    Last edited by Sublime; 09-16-2005 at 12:36 PM.
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  15. 09-16-2005, 12:41 PM #15
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    dood! damn, that sucks

    change your name to Reverend Gouter? Reverend Goiter?

    pulling for you, bro.
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  16. 09-16-2005, 12:43 PM #16
    truth
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    How much drinking do ya need to do to get gout?
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  17. 09-16-2005, 12:52 PM #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by truth
    How much drinking do ya need to do to get gout?
    As Sublime just pasted, I dont think drinking is always the cause.
    I have a very good friend that got it and he rarely drinks.

    So I am safe for now, especially since I'm on the wagon for a fortnight
    Points on their own sitting way up high
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  18. 09-16-2005, 12:56 PM #18
    gincognito
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Reverend Floater
    Turns out I don't have a broken foot. I have gout.
    That sounds like one hell of a misdiagnosis.

    Sick and ashamed and happy (and bummed for the dude who gave us this: ),
    d.
    "Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward."
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  19. 09-16-2005, 12:58 PM #19
    truth
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacDaddy
    As Sublime just pasted, I dont think drinking is always the cause.
    Interesting, from the Web MD definition it could even be genetic. Either way it's a bummer.
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  20. 09-16-2005, 01:01 PM #20
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    Clearly, your dining should include snaquettes of the highest order, despite the hairs in the teeth.

    And you'll have to stop rubbing kaopectate on your knob.
    Merde De Glace On the Freak When Ski
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  21. 09-16-2005, 01:01 PM #21
    shamrockpow
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    Didn't Ben Franklin have the gout? At least you're in good company!
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  22. 09-16-2005, 01:20 PM #22
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    It's your avatar. If you'd quit sucking that thing for just a little while, you wouldn't bloat so.
    Living vicariously through myself.
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  23. 09-16-2005, 01:29 PM #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacDaddy
    As Sublime just pasted, I dont think drinking is always the cause.
    I have a very good friend that got it and he rarely drinks.

    So I am safe for now, especially since I'm on the wagon for a fortnight
    My old boss had it and he's a good mormon - he never drinks and never has. He said whatever medication they put him on worked.

    Bummer though.
    "Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, "Wow, what a Ride!"
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  24. 09-16-2005, 01:40 PM #24
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    "Hello?"
    "yes, hi Rev, this is Jack calling. Jack Daniels. I've missed you so much. 'Member that hooker in Vegas.....and the 2-seater bicycle seat with the bungee-cord? I know you can't do this alone. I'm with you buddy. You know where I am, still right next to Jim, flanked by Booker, across the shelf from the Captain. Stop by soon, we all miss you."
    I have mastered all major sporting activities to a high degree of mediocrity.
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  25. 09-16-2005, 01:45 PM #25
    Booger
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    I have a friend that has Gout and hes not even 50. Cloub be much worse.

    I thinks its also called "The Kings Disease" but have no idea bout the lore behind it.
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