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  1. #26
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
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    In a van... down by the river
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    8,098
    Quote Originally Posted by riser3 View Post
    Or the dildo was too large. Give. lube too.

  2. #27
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
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    In a van... down by the river
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    Quote Originally Posted by subtle plague View Post
    You are a single minded individual. I respect that.
    Edit: my joke is on me because apparently all great minds of tgr think alike.
    And the tgr hive mind is full of dildigence when it comes to helping out wedding guests.

  3. #28
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
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    In a van... down by the river
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    Quote Originally Posted by JimmyCarter View Post
    So a dick shaped one of these?
    Attachment 380998
    I mean... if you can get your dick into one of those... congrats?

  4. #29
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    13,679
    Since we lost Spook, we haven't had a dildo expert on the board for a while. Anybody want to step up and help schindler with the particulars now that we've settled on one as a gift?
    "timberridge is terminally vapid" -- a fortune cookie in Yueyang

  5. #30
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Wasatch Back: 7000'
    Posts
    11,247
    OK, I knew where this would go, and that is part of the fun of it.
    IKON passes: I can't afford that
    Dildo and/or Blue Boutique: Probably a good idea, but I don't think so.
    No sprinter, but I like the axes. There's a great knife shop in town that has cool stuff
    A case of vodka: Also good
    Patchouli oil: One of the scents I like least in life
    Gift cert for Williams Sonoma or REI: The easy way out

    Maybe a few small items featuring splat's CBD cream and ROOR bong?

    The couple is 29-32 years old and have been living to gather for at least 3 years.

    Do I go for longevity, like engraved sporks, practicality, like a kitchen aid mixer, or an outdoor kitchen, or a great weekend, like a hut outside of Ouray or in Uintas???
    “A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that puts freedom before equality will get a high degree of both.”
    ― Milton Friedman

  6. #31
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    1,041
    Nice BBQ grill or smoker?

  7. #32
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    1,910
    an OZ of dakine and a side of shrooms

  8. #33
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I smell poutine!!!
    Posts
    15,244
    Quote Originally Posted by Timberridge View Post
    Since we lost Spook, we haven't had a dildo expert on the board for a while. Anybody want to step up and help schindler with the particulars now that we've settled on one as a gift?
    I nominate skared.

  9. #34
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Location
    In a van... down by the river
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    Quote Originally Posted by riser3 View Post
    I nominate skared.
    Sorry, gents. I'm a Big Idea guy - the details are generally left up to others... you know, Detail People.

  10. #35
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    your vacation
    Posts
    2,891
    does he have a man bun?
    will she be the one wearing the dildo?
    outdoorsy people are just to peppy and happy for me
    buy them a 38 snub nose for protection from bears
    how about the Elizabeth smart biography?

  11. #36
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Location
    In a van... down by the river
    Posts
    8,098
    Quote Originally Posted by fastfred View Post
    <snip>
    will she be the one wearing the dildo?
    Sounds like we found our expert!


  12. #37
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Wasatch Back: 7000'
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    I like this knife. Maybe have blade engraved with date
    The DPx Aculus Flipper
    “A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that puts freedom before equality will get a high degree of both.”
    ― Milton Friedman

  13. #38
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I smell poutine!!!
    Posts
    15,244
    Quote Originally Posted by fastfred View Post
    does he have a man bun?
    will she be the one wearing the dildo?
    outdoorsy people are just to peppy and happy for me
    buy them a 38 snub nose for protection from bears
    how about the Elizabeth smart biography?
    Or a case of white claw to go with the strap-on.

  14. #39
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    15,358
    His and her Paco pads. For attaching the suction dildo.
    Is it radix panax notoginseng? - splat

  15. #40
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    6,360
    Fred, do you do gift cards?


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

  16. #41
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    15,358
    Who invites their Dad's HS friend to their wedding?

    Get them a case of these:

    Is it radix panax notoginseng? - splat

  17. #42
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Wasatch Back: 7000'
    Posts
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    I ski with them at least 5x/ur. and eat with them that often, too.

    Wait, aren’t wedding receptions for the parents? That must be a boomer thing
    “A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that puts freedom before equality will get a high degree of both.”
    ― Milton Friedman

  18. #43
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Wenatchee
    Posts
    9,872
    Quote Originally Posted by MakersTeleMark View Post
    Who invites their Dad's HS friend to their wedding?

    Get them a case of these:

    Huh, I really had no idea that you were gay, nttatwwt.


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

  19. #44
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    NCW
    Posts
    3,435
    Quote Originally Posted by MakersTeleMark View Post
    Who invites their Dad's HS friend to their wedding?
    The guy paying for the wedding.
    Quote Originally Posted by mfcf13 View Post
    The world needs more Donnely and less Stainless.

  20. #45
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    15,358
    Quote Originally Posted by jackattack View Post
    The guy paying for the wedding.
    This makes sense to me now. Hey, Charlie, I'm throwing a big ass party, come on over and look at some hot young tail and get wasted on me.
    Is it radix panax notoginseng? - splat

  21. #46
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Wasatch Back: 7000'
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    It like doing Nitrous balloons

    What are the odd that this guy didn't suck down the entire contents 1 second after this video ended?
    “A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that puts freedom before equality will get a high degree of both.”
    ― Milton Friedman

  22. #47
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    15,358
    Quote Originally Posted by schindlerpiste View Post
    It like doing Nitrous balloons

    What are the odd that this guy didn't suck down the entire contents 1 second after this video ended?
    You need to party with Punani.
    Is it radix panax notoginseng? - splat

  23. #48
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    1,971
    Matching Knipex pliers wrenches or the 3-piece set.

  24. #49
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    truckee
    Posts
    18,007
    Quote Originally Posted by Iowagriz View Post
    How old are they and how long have they been living in sin? In other words, is their apartment and gear already along the way to be dialed.

    I do like the idea of his/hers monogrammed ti sporks.
    My kid and his fiancee (getting married in 3 weeks) are backpackers, rock and ice climbers, skiers--live in a 500 sf apt in Boston and most of their outdoor stuff is in storage.
    IME--mostly based on gifts people who have given me--is that giving people gifts related to their jobs and serious hobbies and passions is rarely successful. Unless the person has expressed a desire for some particular gift--like the fiancee who wanted a pair of quarks for xmas and got them. Does the couple have a wedding website/registry?
    Otherwise go with the sex toys.

  25. #50
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    3,417
    Quote Originally Posted by skaredshtles View Post
    Sorry, gents. I'm a Big Idea guy - the details are generally left up to others... you know, Detail People.
    so you tell the guy to buy the dildo and hire the chick to ride the dildo? Aka the wizard of oz beating off behind the curtain?

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