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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2021
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    115

    What's the best way to tell others you suck?

    Is there a good way to objectively communicate one's downhill ski ability? I was asking someone about skis the other day and came up with "I can confidently approach 90% of all ski terrain, but no one will stop and watch my technique from across the resort" which didn't seem very clear.

    What do you guys think?

  2. #2
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    9,098
    JFC, I donít have this problem.
    Well maybe I'm the faggot America
    I'm not a part of a redneck agenda

  3. #3
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    I think you will find that wearing a hoodie that says “I SUCK” on it could lead to some...awkward encounters.
    Forum Cross Pollinator

  4. #4
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    Put one of those 'L' learning driver or 'N' new driver stickers on the back of your helmet. All the rice rockets here have them on them, not sure why.
    OH, MY GAWD! ―John Hillerman  Big Billie Eilish fan.
    But that's a quibble to what PG posted (at first, anyway, I haven't read his latest book) ―jono
    we are not arguing about ski boots or fashionable clothing or spageheti O's which mean nothing in the grand scheme ― XXX-er

  5. #5
    Join Date
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    what the fuck
    you don't want no smoke.

  6. #6
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    Verdi NV
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    Quote Originally Posted by stealurface831 View Post
    what the fuck
    That was the right response
    Own your fail. ~Jer~

  7. #7
    Join Date
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    we all know now
    embrace the gape
    and believe

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
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    funland
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    5,121
    I ski the blacks

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
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    160
    If you brag about how awesome you are and tell everyone how you shred groomers, they will know pretty quickly.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
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    Where the sheets have no stains
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    16,436
    You must be the best skier on the Mountain.
    I have been in this State for 30 years and I am willing to admit that I am part of the problem.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
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    LV-426
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    18,250
    There was a very loud guy in the lift line for the Mammoth gondola yesterday, wouldn't stop talking. Amongst the babbling was a loud and proud proclamation that yesterday was his 12th day of the season.

    That should probably do it for the OP.
    Quote Originally Posted by powder11 View Post
    if you have to resort to taking advice from the nitwits on this forum, then you're doomed.

  12. #12
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    8,146
    Starting a thread like this one seems to be about as good a way as any. Thanks for the heads up.
    Relentlessly pursuing beauty in an irredeemably ugly world.

  13. #13
    Join Date
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    PM Deepsouthmafia for some tips.
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "I'd eat a bag of Dicks and wash it down with a Coke any day." - iceman

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
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    Imaginationland
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    Best way to tell others you suck?

    Open your mouth and get on your knees. They'll put the pieces together.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
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    between campus and church
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    7,557
    Click image for larger version. 

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  16. #16
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
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    SLC, Utah
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    2,096
    Honestly posting a thread on TGR isn't your best bet. But since I can empathize with you and I find myself in the same position, I'll give you an honest answer. If I'm talking to a potential partner, I usually try to qualify my ability level honestly and objectively (eg, "I've been touring for 5 years but I don't have much downhill ski experience. I ski as much as I can, and I've got an Avy1 and a WFR - I have lots of backcountry experience but I'm not a super talented downhill skier"). I might try to provide example lines I've skied (not for dick waving but just to give them an idea of my ability level), or I might say something like "I'm comfortable in terrain as steep as 45 degrees, but I can't jump turn proficiently yet"

    If I'm talking to a rando I usually just go with the tried and true "I suck at skiing". No need to parse some dumb metaphor, say it like it is.

    Sent from my Pixel 4a (5G) using Tapatalk

  17. #17
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    I'm the best skier on the mountain so I wouldn't know.
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "I'd eat a bag of Dicks and wash it down with a Coke any day." - iceman

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Sep 2018
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peruvian View Post
    Click image for larger version. 

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    Either of these at Taos

    Sent from my SM-G981U using Tapatalk

  19. #19
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    Jan 2019
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    59715
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    looking like a big dork helps.

  20. #20
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    Mar 2005
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    Colorado
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    2,024
    Soul 7's

  21. #21
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    Mar 2006
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    Missoula, MT
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    21,643
    "I've done this a few times before"
    My go to is usually something about my back. But I also don't totally suck.
    No longer stuck.

    Quote Originally Posted by stuckathuntermtn View Post
    Just an uneducated guess.

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Dec 2018
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    DownEast
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    1,443
    “I don’t ski bumps” seems succinct.

  23. #23
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
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    northern BC
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    Fading advanced
    Lee Lau - xxx-er is the laziest Asian canuck I know

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
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    truckee
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    Quote Originally Posted by CirqueScaler View Post
    Is there a good way to objectively communicate one's downhill ski ability? I was asking someone about skis the other day and came up with "I can confidently approach 90% of all ski terrain, but no one will stop and watch my technique from across the resort" which didn't seem very clear.

    What do you guys think?
    How do you know I suck (I do, but how do you know).

  25. #25
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
    Posts
    226
    THE BEST WAY TO SAY i SUCK IS TO....ski up, real fast, skid sideways, and take them out at the ankles... works in any language, at any ski area, anywhere in the world. Works on an non verbal, instinctual level, for clear instantaneous communication. Best of all, it is not just the person you hit that will understand you suck... but everybody within splatter shot of the impact will also instantly comprehend your abilities as well.
    Last edited by snojones; 05-02-2021 at 12:51 PM. Reason: still chuckeling

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