Sobriety, V2.

[~mikey b]

that’s called friends

[SumJongGuy]

that’s called friends

Do you have many REALLY good friends who don't smoke weed at all? Serious question. I have some from way back.. But, not many in sobriety. Because most are in AA or weren't partiers at all.

Different perspective.. If you had to give up weed, for whatever reason could NEVER smoke weed again, would you be more likely to start drinking again?

[~mikey b]

dood thanks for the questions


yes

I have lots of friends who don’t smoke weed at all - always have and always will - at this point I probably hang out with more people that don’t smoke than do



AND


no

I don’t think I’d be more likely to start drinking again if I couldn’t smoke weed again - at this point I don’t like alcohol or how it makes me feel and behave - I quit weed for like the first year I quit beer because I got scared - I like weed but I don’t like beer




my girlfriend is getting out of a marriage with an alcoholic - she has been trending sober since we started hanging out together - she’s she’s had a few beers, but she’s feeling like it’s better for her to not have it around

I have a 16 year old son and she has 13 and 16 year old sons - they all have dads who have struggled - I’m sober but I don’t know about her ex - we really don’t need to have alcohol around for them to see - she smokes here and there, but she is very careful about that too - and she’s asked me to stay aware of my toking because she knows it might not be good for me and she wants me clear headed





at this point in my life almost everyone I know is my group - pretty much everyone I know knows about my shit - and I am not afraid to share it with new people I meet - when my girlfriend and I stayed with a friend of hers a couple weeks ago she told her friend I don’t drink and told her a little bit why - that was cool - we can normalize things like that

[54-46]

Alright AA’ers and AA H8’ers, any thoughts on California sobriety if it seems to be working after quitting booze.

Haven’t counted my days, but I’m done with sauce for at least 7 months and questioning if I’m kidding myself by keeping green as a crutch.

I’d welcome feedback and am not personally predisposed to AA, but can see how it works for many and know the hard line position on the issue. Just can’t say I’ve ever felt weakness about the decision made to quit booze - whether burning or sober.

I went to some meetings of Recovery Dharma with my ex to support her, and it seemed to be less preachy and “shame-y” than AA. Buddhist principles.

This was in CA.

https://recoverydharma.org




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[Meadow Skipper]

I went to some meetings of Recovery Dharma with my ex to support her, and it seemed to be less preachy and “shame-y” than AA. Buddhist principles.

This was in CA.

https://recoverydharma.org

A good friend goes to dharma recovery in NorCal, really likes ^those aspects. Another person I know goes only to atheist AA meetings, says they’re not uncommon. Finds them with internet searches.

[~mikey b]

COVID sure fucked a lot of people over that are used to groups.

I went to a couple of those Dharma meetings but they were a long drive and it wasn’t sustainable for me.

Zoom sessions aren’t really my thing. I’ve done it one on one for counseling and that’s tolerable but I really prefer face to face.

[riser4]

One foot in front of the other.

[Meadow Skipper]

^ I get it. I’m not abstinent (and not trying to be), but I don’t think I could handle meetings - too much of a misanthropic introvert. I was just throwing out some alternatives that have worked for people I know.

[~mikey b]

[~mikey b]

it’s amazing what the holidays can do to folks

I’ve been helping a friend who is struggling again

I’m going to take her ski touring and to a meeting tomorrow. In that order.



edit: yeah, I’ll take her to a meeting

that’s where we met

that’s what she needs

she knows it’s not my thing but I told her I’ll go with her

[whyturn]

it’s amazing what the holidays can do to folks

I’ve been helping a friend who is struggling again

I’m going to take her ski touring and to a meeting tomorrow. In that order.



edit: yeah, I’ll take her to a meeting

that’s where we met

that’s what she needs

she knows it’s not my thing but I told her I’ll go with her

Good on you. It’s not about you, it’s about helping her


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[SumJongGuy]

Everybody ends up with their own program. Start with the basics then stick with what works for you. Helping others is critical regardless of what you do with the rest of your recovery strategy. Keeping close to the struggles of others (while helping them) reminds us how close we are to that ourselves if we don't keep vigilant.

[~mikey b]

yup

and she’s specifically asked me to take her / teach her touring. Today she’s snowshoeing up and riding down at the ski area, but we’ll get her a ski set up. She knows what she can get from me and how I can help her best. Fkn smart really.

I offered to take her to a meeting. I don’t think she’s gone since she wrecked. I’ll even drive an hour plus so we can go to our old, small home group where we met.

[~mikey b]

damn

she no showed

not responding

[baron]

Hang in there ya'll

Reading here people talk about the mental battle... but that's only 1/2 of it. Working in a hospital last few years I have seen a few people in the E R who quit drinking but their body still addicted. Holy sh*t> serious mental confusion, hallucinations and seizures. Limbs flailing so violently they need to be strapped down sometimes.

That's some heavy sh*t /I'll never look at an alcoholic the same way again.

Good Luck out there. It's nice to know there's places like this thread people can talk about this stuff without the finger pointing I saw in meetings I was at years ago.

Carry On

[SumJongGuy]

^^^^Jerry Garcia died of a heart attack in full on delirium tremens.. with a full medical staff attending his detox.. Mine was pretty rough too but I was home alone riding it out solo.

damn

she no showed

not responding

Dude that's rough. Not much more you can do at this point though.... unless you can connect with her family intervention style. I've never been involved on one personally though. Unfortunately they don't have a high success rate long term. We need to want it for ourselves as much as others want it for us..

[Whiteroom_Guardian]

I had a withdrawal induced seizure in 2010. Scariest moment of my life. Scarier than being under moving snow in a slide bouncing off the rocks/bed surface. I wouldn't wish booze withdrawal on my worst enemies.

Coming up on 12 years sober. Just got a second sponsee yesterday. We'll be reading the book/and skinning vert. I only seem to sponsor skiers

[~mikey b]

https://restorationrecoverycenter.com


I’ve been wondering about some of the folks in this thread lately

a friend of mine who used to be a big mountain extreme ski athlete started this place

it’s totally different than any place I’ve ever seen

lots of outdoor activities

tech friendly - they don’t take all your stuff away - they treat you like an adult with a life, not like a loser

I’ve never been there, but I know it’s different

if you need help you should check em out

hit me up if you need help getting help



❤️

[TNKen]

Daughter is hard off the wagon.
Drink of choice these days are airplane bottles of lemonade vodka
Fiancé dumped her and kicked her out of the house
Fired last Friday at work.
Suspended from ski patrol.
Psychiatrist keeps giving her anything she wants

But, apparently, for her, the bottom is not yet in sight.
FML

[~mikey b]

oh shit Ken

[byates1]

Fuck bro. Brutal. Sorry man.

I feel good. A meeting a week, touch base w my sponsor weekly. I'm enjoying clarity.

[yeahman]

That sucks Ken. Hard to fathom the power alcohol must have over her to watch her life fall apart like that and still keep doing it. Vibes to you and her and your whole family. What a difficult thing to watch your child go through, I just can't imagine how hard that must be.

[riser4]

Daughter is hard off the wagon.
Drink of choice these days are airplane bottles of lemonade vodka
Fiancé dumped her and kicked her out of the house
Fired last Friday at work.
Suspended from ski patrol.
Psychiatrist keeps giving her anything she wants

But, apparently, for her, the bottom is not yet in sight.
FML

Man. Nothing I can say that will really help.

[TNKen]

That sucks Ken. Hard to fathom the power alcohol must have over her to watch her life fall apart like that and still keep doing it. Vibes to you and her and your whole family. What a difficult thing to watch your child go through, I just can't imagine how hard that must be.

And I have no fucking clue how or what to do. She is driving all of us crazy. 15 calls a day to her twin sister the PA who has enough stress in her life already.

I do know she is going to end up dead if she doesn't get her shit together. Car wreck, liver failure, fall down the steps, who the fuck knows.

[byates1]

My cousin's daughter is a lifelong drug alcohol disaster. Raised by great ppl in a loving family. Prison, rape, street ppl, prostitution, stealing from the family. The whole fucking deal.

Shes a little bit better now but track marks all over her still.

They had to let her go to preserve themselves and their other daughter, after basically wrecking thier retirement to help her..

You gotta be you and have a life. A good life. She's walking her own path. Easier said than done I know.

Best wishes bro.