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Thread: Good road signs

  1. #1
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    Good road signs

    I think bmills posted a funny one the other day and then tonight while I was driving home I spotted a real peach. It alternated between,

    You're not Rudolph & Don't drive lit

    Watchaya got?
    Brandine: Now Cletus, if I catch you with pig lipstick on your collar one more time you ain't gonna be allowed to sleep in the barn no more!
    Cletus: Duly noted.

  2. #2
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    a long-ago GF introduced me to this game. driving around, we'd see various road signs. and in her best Norma Desmond, she'd break into, "If my vagina was a road sign it would say [whatever the road sign said]." she was fucking hilarious and we could spend hours doing this happily.

    depends 100% on your partner, but i recommend trying it, with or without a buzz. you'll be surprised how well it works for many common (and not so common) signs.
    Last edited by ntblanks; 12-23-2020 at 09:32 AM.

  3. #3
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    ..Tonight There's Gonna Be a Jailbreak...

  4. #4
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    Not a road sign, but a restaurant had a big electric sign that said Cocktails. The first few letters burned out and stayed that way for a couple years. Finally they fixed it. Then the last 5 burned out all at once so the sign brightly proclaimed: Cock. That got fixed before the next time I drove past.

  5. #5
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    Moved from very small town to very, very large city after college. Immediately noticed massive red signs hanging over the road saying


    NO



    like, WTF did i do?

    33 years later I'm still not entirely sure.
    "Can't you see..."

  6. #6
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    I posted this before. The village of South Lincoln, VT had "Dry Heaves" signs in the 70s, early 80s. There was a section with spots next to the river that would raise up year round and they apparently didn't think a frost heaves sign was appropriate in the summer.

  7. #7
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    There's a road leading to one of the lower trailer parks in town here and it's got a "Dead End" sign with an arrow pointing towards it. It's just brutal.

  8. #8
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    This one got a lot of play a few years ago around Boston:



    Nobody actually did what it said, though

  9. #9
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    ^ that's hysterical.
    "Can't you see..."

  10. #10
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    Feely, MT

    No services.

    (always wanted a picture of me standing in front of that sign in a trenchcoat with no pants)
    Merde De Glace On the Freak When Ski
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  11. #11
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    Mntlion is a professional child
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  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by ntblanks View Post
    a long-ago GF introduced me to this game. driving around, we'd see various road signs. and in her best Norma Desmond, she'd break into, "If my vagina was a road sign it would say [whatever the road sign said]." she was fucking hilarious and we could spend hours doing this happily.

    depends 100% on your partner, but i recommend trying it, with or without a buzz. you'll be surprised how well it works for many common (and not so common) signs.
    She sounds awesome.
    Forum Cross Pollinator

  13. #13
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    In CT for whatever reason speed bumps are called humps, so ya get signs all over the place that say

    "Speed Humps"

    I giggle every time

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Woodsy View Post
    In CT for whatever reason speed bumps are called humps, so ya get signs all over the place that say

    "Speed Humps"

    I giggle every time
    They should combine their signs with the ones I posted above. Dry Humps.

  15. #15
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    In Wisconsin last summer i saw "Camp in the woods, not in the left lane."

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cruiser View Post

    You're not Rudolph & Don't drive lit

    Watchaya got?
    Just saw that this morning driving west on 6th Ave to 70.

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Woodsy View Post
    In CT for whatever reason speed bumps are called humps, so ya get signs all over the place that say

    "Speed Humps"

    I giggle every time
    I think I've seen that in New Mexico as well. Definitely enjoyed it

  18. #18
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    I got into an accident in front of Hotel Coral Essex.

  19. #19
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    DOT has been running "Twitter's full. Put down the phone." around here the last few days.

  20. #20
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    My sister had a great Dad joke when we were kids.
    Every time we drove by a "Slow Deaf Child" sign she'd say "It's bad enough the kid is blind but why do they have to call him stupid"?

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by evdog View Post
    Not a road sign, but a restaurant had a big electric sign that said Cocktails. The first few letters burned out and stayed that way for a couple years. Finally they fixed it. Then the last 5 burned out all at once so the sign brightly proclaimed: Cock. That got fixed before the next time I drove past.

    Click image for larger version. 

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  22. #22
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    Driving in France, 130 kph and there's a huge red sign with lots of words printed in white and a big slash through the whole thing and I can't understand a single word. I keep waiting for the pavement to suddenly end or to be crushed by a giant falling rock but nothing happens. I have no idea what the sign was about.

  23. #23
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    near Glendive MT on I-94

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  24. #24
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    Maine DOT had a bunch a while back, not sure if they're still doing it.
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  25. #25
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    The printed ads are pretty good too.
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