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  1. #1
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    Mar 2006
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    General Sherman's Favorite City
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    35,251

    Happy Independence Day Maggots

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    I still call it The Jake.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
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    on the banks of Fish Creek
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    time to get this holiday started.....


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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    General Sherman's Favorite City
    Posts
    35,251
    Hell. Yes.
    I still call it The Jake.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    hell, CA pop 4
    Posts
    2,398
    Brisket goes on this evening, and gets pulled off in the mourning to start the ribs.

    Might be some beer, but the odds of Strawberry Crunch are low.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    In Your Wife
    Posts
    8,291


    "Watch the steps, Lud! They're tricky."
    Last edited by glademaster; 07-03-2020 at 11:21 AM.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Looking down
    Posts
    50,491

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Bottom feeding
    Posts
    10,828
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    All countries matter.
    Well maybe I'm the faggot America
    I'm not a part of a redneck agenda

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    EWA
    Posts
    22,006
    The Most American Recipes for Your Fourth of July Cookout
    By Susanna Wolff

    July 4, 2016


    Photograph by Angela Cappetta/ Getty


    All-American Burgers

    Ingredients:

    -Ground chuck, formed into patties
    -American cheese (technically "cheese product"), the most orange you can find
    -Salt and pepper
    -Male confidence

    Instructions:

    Set up two (2) grills: one operated by a woman who is a professional chef, the other operated by a man who owns a bankrupt roofing company.

    Watch as your father-in-law gets a burger prepared by the man because "you know what you're gonna get with him."

    Eat three (3) cheeseburgers so your mouth is too full to argue.




    Electoral-College Vegan Dogs

    Ingredients:

    -Approximately one thousand (1,000) seitan "hot dogs"
    -Exactly one (1) person who is going to eat these gross things

    Instructions:

    In a poorly thought-out attempt at checking the power of the majority, let Rebecca's smelly vegan boyfriend—named Sparrow, or maybe Falcon?—be responsible for one (1) whole dish.

    Try to dupe third-tier friends who continue to post daily pro-Bernie screeds on Facebook into trying the garbage "hot dogs," after it becomes clear that your dog won't even touch them.



    Texas-Style Guacamole

    Ingredients:

    -2 ripe avocados
    -1 red onion
    -1-3 white Texans
    -1 tomato
    -A dash of cayenne, just to give it a little kick—or, as the non-Spanish-speaking Texans say, "make it caliente"

    Instructions:

    While preparing the guacamole (your standard chopping and mushing), listen to the white Texans talk about how much they love Mexican food and how Texas really has the best Mexican food out there. You haven't had Mexican food till you've been to Texas!

    Listen to those same white Texans talk about how excited they are to build a wall to keep out all the Mexicans.



    Public-School Vegetables

    Ingredients:

    -Ketchup
    -Salsa
    -Mustard? That comes from a seed, right?

    Instructions:

    Realize too late that you should have made a salad or something to accompany the huge pile of meat and bread that you and your guests will consume.

    Pretend that eating two (2) of your three (3) cheeseburgers standing up means that you've already burned off most of the calories.

    Listen to your father-in-law talk about how people on welfare should be drug-tested while he has his fourth burger and eighth beer.



    Ice-Cream Sandwich or a Rolled-Up Piece of Bologna

    Ingredients:

    -Nowhere near enough ice-cream sandwiches
    -A whole bunch of bologna

    Instructions:

    Spend months listening to friends talk about how much they love ice-cream sandwiches and how desperate they are to have one.

    Run out of ice-cream sandwiches before any of these people can have one.

    Offer an alternative, but similar, dessert like a King Cone and then watch these ice-cream-sandwich diehards decide that they refuse to support such a monocratic ice-cream treat. No, they're going to eat the weird bologna tubes that Gary brought because that's how much they care. #neverkingcone



    Alcohol, Oh, So Much Alcohol

    Ingredients:

    -9 bottles of wine
    -60 beers
    -1 water bottle full of vodka, shh

    Instructions:

    Hide from everyone and drink by yourself.

    Take solace in the fact that this election will be over before Thanksgiving.

    Go set off some fireworks and listen to your father-in-law talk about the Second Amendment.
    When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis


    Kindness is a bridge between all people

    Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    EWA
    Posts
    22,006
    A Nation's Story: "What to the Slave is the Fourth of July?"


    A black-and-white photograph of Frederick Douglass wearing a jacket, waistcoat, and bowtie. The wet plate ambrotype plates are housed in a folding leather case with tooled gilt oval mat.
    Collection of the Smithsonian National Museum of African American History and Culture



    On July 5, 1852, Frederick Douglass gave a keynote address at an Independence Day celebration and asked, "What to the Slave is the Fourth of July?" Douglass was a powerful orator, often traveling six months out of the year to give lectures on abolition. His speech was delivered at an event commemorating the signing of the Declaration of Independence, held at Corinthian Hall in Rochester, New York. It was a scathing speech in which Douglass stated, "This Fourth of July is yours, not mine, You may rejoice, I must mourn."

    In his speech, Douglass acknowledged the Founding Fathers of America, the architects of the Declaration of Independence, for their commitment to "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness":

    “Fellow Citizens, I am not wanting in respect for the fathers of this republic. The signers of the Declaration of Independence were brave men. They were great men, too, great enough to give frame to a great age. It does not often happen to a nation to raise, at one time, such a number of truly great men. The point from which I am compelled to view them is not, certainly, the most favorable; and yet I cannot contemplate their great deeds with less than admiration. They were statesmen, patriots and heroes, and for the good they did, and the principles they contended for, I will unite with you to honor their memory….

    Douglass states that the nation's founders are great men for their ideals for freedom, but in doing so he brings awareness to the hypocrisy of their ideals with the existence of slavery on American soil. Douglass continues to interrogate the meaning of the Declaration of Independence, to enslaved African Americans experiencing grave inequality and injustice:

    "…Fellow-citizens, pardon me, allow me to ask, why am I called upon to speak here to-day? What have I, or those I represent, to do with your national independence? Are the great principles of political freedom and of natural justice, embodied in that Declaration of Independence, extended to us? and am I, therefore, called upon to bring our humble offering to the national altar, and to confess the benefits and express devout gratitude for the blessings resulting from your independence to us?"

    "...Would to God, both for your sakes and ours, that an affirmative answer could be truthfully returned to these questions! Then would my task be light, and my burden easy and delightful. For who is there so cold, that a nation’s sympathy could not warm him? Who so obdurate and dead to the claims of gratitude, that would not thankfully acknowledge such priceless benefits? Who so stolid and selfish, that would not give his voice to swell the hallelujahs of a nation’s jubilee, when the chains of servitude had been torn from his limbs? I am not that man. In a case like that, the dumb might eloquently speak, and the 'lame man leap as an hart.'

    But such is not the state of the case. I say it with a sad sense of the disparity between us. I am not included within the pale of glorious anniversary! Your high independence only reveals the immeasurable distance between us. The blessings in which you, this day, rejoice, are not enjoyed in common. The rich inheritance of justice, liberty, prosperity and independence, bequeathed by your fathers, is shared by you, not by me. The sunlight that brought light and healing to you, has brought stripes and death to me. This Fourth July is yours, not mine. You may rejoice, I must mourn..."

    —Frederick Douglass, July 5, 1852

    This speech given by Frederick Douglass would be remembered as on of his most poignant. Read the speech in full on PBS.
    When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis


    Kindness is a bridge between all people

    Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Wenatchee
    Posts
    14,613
    Quote Originally Posted by Benny Profane View Post
    Funny, I was singing this to myself on my bike ride this morning


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Access to Granlibakken
    Posts
    11,184
    Trump described famed 19th century abolitionist Frederick Douglass as "an example of somebody who's done an amazing job and is being recognized more and more."
    ....

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Wasatch Back: 7000'
    Posts
    12,966
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    “How does it feel to be the greatest guitarist in the world? I don’t know, go ask Rory Gallagher”. — Jimi Hendrix

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Down In A Hole, Up in the Sky
    Posts
    35,361
    So, we watched the fireworks at Snow King from the back deck. it was a little melancholy, usually you can hear the roar of the assembled crowd during the finale...and my son said that most of them looked like huge blowups of coronavirus pictures.
    Forum Cross Pollinator, gratuitously strident

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    EWA
    Posts
    22,006
    Quote Originally Posted by rideit View Post
    So, we watched the fireworks at Snow King from the back deck. it was a little melancholy, usually you can hear the roar of the assembled crowd during the finale...and my son said that most of them looked like huge blowups of coronavirus pictures.
    I was thinking the same thing about the virus molecule!
    When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis


    Kindness is a bridge between all people

    Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    here and there
    Posts
    18,583
    Full buck moon to boot
    watch out for snakes

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Looking down
    Posts
    50,491

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    on the banks of Fish Creek
    Posts
    7,514
    lotsa money being burned right there.

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Alpental
    Posts
    6,565
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    Move upside and let the man go through...

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Looking down
    Posts
    50,491
    Quote Originally Posted by m2711c View Post
    lotsa money being burned right there.
    Not really. A few hundred buys a lot of fun in PA. stores.

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    19,814
    Crazy in the barrio last night with full moon. Solid show for 2.5 hours

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    on the banks of Fish Creek
    Posts
    7,514
    Quote Originally Posted by Benny Profane View Post
    Not really. A few hundred buys a lot of fun in PA. stores.

    X all of those little spots you see in that video.... Besides, nobody drives all the way to PA just to spend a couple hundred dollars at the fucking fireworks store. People go whole hog.

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Looking down
    Posts
    50,491
    I do. On my way to Maryland. Believe me, for one good backyard show, 2 to 300 buys a lot.

  23. #23
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    11,149

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Looking down
    Posts
    50,491
    Life imitates art. Re: Spinal Tap.

  25. #25
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    426
    https://youtu.be/ugNn_ELV_xs


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

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