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  1. #8476
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    Mar 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by I Skied Bandini Mountain View Post
    You could go full Ted Kacynski out there.
    Out here, no one can hear you scream.

    Go ahead, try it.
    I still call it The Jake.

  2. #8477
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I can still smell Poutine.
    Posts
    24,503
    Quote Originally Posted by BmillsSkier View Post
    Out here, no one can hear you scream.

    Go ahead, try it.
    Isn't that also true on Harry's Island?

  3. #8478
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    Mar 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by riser4 View Post
    Isn't that also true on Harry's Island?
    I think the sound really carries across the frozen water in wintertime.
    I still call it The Jake.

  4. #8479
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    3,301
    I forgot that we hit Ted’s on the way back south too. My kid was good with the basic fish fry two days in a row but I decided to go with a couple fish tacos instead

    Click image for larger version. 

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  5. #8480
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
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    Babylon
    Posts
    13,450
    No macaroni salad?

  6. #8481
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    Mar 2006
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    General Sherman's Favorite City
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    Ted’s trays look good enough to slide on.
    I still call it The Jake.

  7. #8482
    Join Date
    Sep 2018
    Posts
    6,643
    Quote Originally Posted by BmillsSkier View Post
    Ted’s trays look good enough to slide on.
    Oh shit, somehow I had completely forgotten about that.

  8. #8483
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    General Sherman's Favorite City
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    Quote Originally Posted by EWG View Post
    Oh shit, somehow I had completely forgotten about that.
    Back when I was briefly a liftie at a 3rd tier ski area the cafeteria tray was the second most used method of getting downhill when it came time to rotate. The first being the shovel.
    I still call it The Jake.

  9. #8484
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Carbondale
    Posts
    12,478
    Quote Originally Posted by BmillsSkier View Post
    Back when I was briefly a liftie at a 3rd tier ski area the cafeteria tray was the second most used method of getting downhill when it came time to rotate. The first being the shovel.
    We had shovel races at our little hill in the UPSTATES.
    www.dpsskis.com
    www.point6.com
    formerly an ambassador for a few others, but the ski industry is... interesting.
    Fukt: a very small amount of snow.

  10. #8485
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    General Sherman's Favorite City
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    Quote Originally Posted by grskier View Post
    We had shovel races at our little hill in the UPSTATES.
    Those fuckers are fast!
    I still call it The Jake.

  11. #8486
    Join Date
    Sep 2018
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    6,643
    Quote Originally Posted by BmillsSkier View Post
    Those fuckers are fast!
    Also more stable than the trays.

  12. #8487
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    Mar 2006
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    General Sherman's Favorite City
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    Let's be honest though, the handle just gave you some kind of false sense of being able to actually direct where the thing was going.
    I still call it The Jake.

  13. #8488
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    17,747
    Quote Originally Posted by BmillsSkier View Post
    Those fuckers are fast!
    Especiially if you coated them with non-caloric silicone-based kitchen lubricant.
    "timberridge is terminally vapid" -- a fortune cookie in Yueyang

  14. #8489
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I can still smell Poutine.
    Posts
    24,503
    It's all fun and games until you catch a shovel handle in the testicles.

  15. #8490
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    Sep 2018
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    6,643
    Quote Originally Posted by riser4 View Post
    It's all fun and games until you catch a shovel handle in the testicles.
    It's still games. It's just not fun anymore.

  16. #8491
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    Mar 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timberridge View Post
    Especiially if you coated them with non-caloric silicone-based kitchen lubricant.
    We found that "Whirl" brand liquid butter substitute from the kitchen worked well too.

    Quote Originally Posted by riser4 View Post
    It's all fun and games until you catch a shovel handle in the testicles.
    Then it's hilarious.
    I still call it The Jake.

  17. #8492
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Location
    the Dog Patch
    Posts
    334
    Quote Originally Posted by BmillsSkier View Post
    Back when I was briefly a liftie at a 3rd tier ski area the cafeteria tray was the second most used method of getting downhill when it came time to rotate. The first being the shovel.
    my buddies and I used to race cafeteria trays down the slope from the bottom of the lifts to the base lodge at Bristol on Friday nights while our parents hung out in the lodge and drank at après. good times in the Upstates.

    ETA: they've since filled that slope in to build a patio and do a bunch of other main lodge renovations. RIP cafeteria tray races.. the youths these day's don't know what they're missin'
    my head is perpetually in the clouds

  18. #8493
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    Inside the Circle
    Posts
    4,167
    Quote Originally Posted by Timberridge View Post
    Especiially if you coated them with non-caloric silicone-based kitchen lubricant.
    I got it...

  19. #8494
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I can still smell Poutine.
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    Quote Originally Posted by BmillsSkier View Post
    We found that "Whirl" brand liquid butter substitute from the kitchen worked well too.



    Then it's hilarious.
    Ow, my balls!

  20. #8495
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    3,301
    I remember going through orientation as new liftie and one of the supervisors claimed that shovel riding was a fire-able offense. It had never occurred to me to use a shovel as a sled before that and I thought for a second; why would I do that if I’m allowed to ski down? Then I tried and I understood. More fun than it should be. Also, it never got anybody fired. I’m not sure there were any real fire-able offenses for the lift department.
    edit: They also said it would get us fired as snowmakers the year I did that. Also a lie. And it’s a way more useful skill as a snowmaker.

  21. #8496
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I can still smell Poutine.
    Posts
    24,503
    When I was a kid, one of the best places to sled was the Burlington Country Club. The sledding hill was right next to UVM so the hill was always littered with abandoned cafeteria trays. The main runs would always get iced up. Someone would build a jump. UVM rescue got so they'd just hang out some afternoons and wait for the carnage. In HS a buddy broke both wrists at the same time snowboarding there. We'd mess with him in the hallways, but he had a few black belts by then and you didn't want to get within kicking range.

  22. #8497
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    on the banks of Fish Creek
    Posts
    7,512
    Snowmakers don’t fucking ride shovels. Not if they know what the fuck they’re doing. As previously pointed out, a shovel handle will wreck yer fucking nuts.

    when I was working at the Gore, the fucking state outfitted us in the same gotdamned yellow fuckin’ rain slickers that Groton fisherman wore… motherfuckin’ rain slickers, while working it on the inclined ice. yep. no headlamps neither, instead we get a 4 D cell maglite like the ones cops usta use to club the shit out of hippies back in the day, with a rope duct taped to it so as you can hang that heavy assed piece of shit around yer neck.

    So, buddy and I were making a run down Hawkeye tending to the ratniks on ground sleds cause nobody had yet thought to put the goddamn guns up 40 foot in the fuckin’ air the way we do now…



    On a two man run, one guy would walk the hydrants line nice and dry adjustin’ the water as directed by the other sucker who would be walkin’ under the guns to check if we was makin’ rains or snows. i was the sucker on the upper headwall... after which we take another safety meeting before switchin’ roles on the lower steeps.

    we made it down to second hydrant and buddy was onslope moving the ratnik to optimal position takin’ all possible wind variations into careful consideration when he stepped out onto the bulletproof wonder we had just laid down as “base”… slipped onto his rain slickered ass and that fucker accelerated off the line faster than ol’ big daddy don garlits. no shit, that big assed maglite beatin’ him about the head and shoulders like a fuckin’ lightsaber possessed as he went flailing down the fall line.

    he made it bout three quarters the way to headwaters before he caught one of them ratnik sledsright in the fuckin’ balls ow. stopped him dead in his tracks from top speed…

    by the time i got to him, that sweet hit of adrenaline had kicked in and he was up hopping around saying I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, but he weren’t… nope.

    said he gots ta pee, so he turns to shoot a dukie but there ain’t no stream… after a bit he says, to nobody in particular, “jeesh” he says “why are my balls so fuckin’ hudge?”

    turns out, running into that ratnik had severed his urethra somewhere back up inside his fucking cock. so, when he went to take that piss, instead of exiting the cock as one would expect, it just filled up his ball sack with impressive faux elephantiasis style results.

    there was a new buddy on at next shift.



    fact.




    how to get about the mountain without wrecking yer balls? snowmakers in the know use the Swiss Bob cause nobody needs nothin’ whackin’ ‘em in their crotch at speeds.

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    kinda like this but at night.

    Last edited by m2711c; 07-27-2022 at 08:55 PM.

  23. #8498
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Carbondale
    Posts
    12,478
    Quote Originally Posted by m2711c View Post
    Snowmakers don’t fucking ride shovels. Not if they know what the fuck they’re doing. As previously pointed out, a shovel handle will wreck yer fucking nuts.

    when I was working at the Gore, the fucking state outfitted us in the same gotdamned yellow fuckin’ rain slickers that Groton fisherman wore… motherfuckin’ rain slickers, while working it on the inclined ice. yep. no headlamps neither, instead we get a 4 D cell maglite like the ones cops usta use to club the shit out of hippies back in the day, with a rope duct taped to it so as you can hang that heavy assed piece of shit around yer neck.

    So, buddy and I were making a run down Hawkeye tending to the ratniks on ground sleds cause nobody had yet thought to put the goddamn guns up 40 foot in the fuckin’ air the way we do now…


    On a two man run, one guy would walk the hydrants line nice and dry adjustin’ the water as directed by the other sucker who would be walkin’ under the guns to check if we was makin’ rains or snows. i was the sucker on the upper headwall... after which we take another safety meeting before switchin’ roles on the lower steeps.

    we made it down to second hydrant and buddy was onslope moving the ratnik to optimal position takin’ all possible wind variations into careful consideration when he stepped out onto the bulletproof wonder we had just laid down as “base”… slipped onto his rain slickered ass and that fucker accelerated off the line faster than ol’ big daddy don garlits. no shit, that big assed maglite beatin’ him about the head and shoulders like a fuckin’ lightsaber possessed as he went flailing down the fall line.

    he made it bout three quarters the way to headwaters before he caught one of them ratnik sledsright in the fuckin’ balls ow. stopped him dead in his tracks from top speed…

    by the time i got to him, that sweet hit of adrenaline had kicked in and he was up hopping around saying I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, but he weren’t… nope.

    said he gots ta pee, so he turns to shoot a dukie but there ain’t no stream… after a bit he says, to nobody in particular, “jeesh” he says “why are my balls so fuckin’ hudge?”

    turns out, running into that ratnik had severed his urethra somewhere back up inside his fucking cock. so, when he went to take that piss, instead of exiting the cock as one would expect, it just filled up his ball sack with impressive faux elephantiasis style results.

    there was a new buddy on at next shift.



    fact.




    how to get about the mountain without wrecking yer balls? snowmakers in the know use the Swiss Bob cause nobody needs nothin’ whackin’ ‘em in their crotch at speeds.


    ]
    All time upstate story...
    www.dpsskis.com
    www.point6.com
    formerly an ambassador for a few others, but the ski industry is... interesting.
    Fukt: a very small amount of snow.

  24. #8499
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    General Sherman's Favorite City
    Posts
    35,237
    Quote Originally Posted by MyNameIsAugustWest View Post
    I got it...
    Oh I got it too Griswold.

    Quote Originally Posted by m2711c View Post
    Snowmakers don’t fucking ride shovels. Not if they know what the fuck they’re doing. As previously pointed out, a shovel handle will wreck yer fucking nuts.

    when I was working at the Gore, the fucking state outfitted us in the same gotdamned yellow fuckin’ rain slickers that Groton fisherman wore… motherfuckin’ rain slickers, while working it on the inclined ice. yep. no headlamps neither, instead we get a 4 D cell maglite like the ones cops usta use to club the shit out of hippies back in the day, with a rope duct taped to it so as you can hang that heavy assed piece of shit around yer neck.

    So, buddy and I were making a run down Hawkeye tending to the ratniks on ground sleds cause nobody had yet thought to put the goddamn guns up 40 foot in the fuckin’ air the way we do now…



    On a two man run, one guy would walk the hydrants line nice and dry adjustin’ the water as directed by the other sucker who would be walkin’ under the guns to check if we was makin’ rains or snows. i was the sucker on the upper headwall... after which we take another safety meeting before switchin’ roles on the lower steeps.

    we made it down to second hydrant and buddy was onslope moving the ratnik to optimal position takin’ all possible wind variations into careful consideration when he stepped out onto the bulletproof wonder we had just laid down as “base”… slipped onto his rain slickered ass and that fucker accelerated off the line faster than ol’ big daddy don garlits. no shit, that big assed maglite beatin’ him about the head and shoulders like a fuckin’ lightsaber possessed as he went flailing down the fall line.

    he made it bout three quarters the way to headwaters before he caught one of them ratnik sledsright in the fuckin’ balls ow. stopped him dead in his tracks from top speed…

    by the time i got to him, that sweet hit of adrenaline had kicked in and he was up hopping around saying I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, I’m fucking fine, but he weren’t… nope.

    said he gots ta pee, so he turns to shoot a dukie but there ain’t no stream… after a bit he says, to nobody in particular, “jeesh” he says “why are my balls so fuckin’ hudge?”

    turns out, running into that ratnik had severed his urethra somewhere back up inside his fucking cock. so, when he went to take that piss, instead of exiting the cock as one would expect, it just filled up his ball sack with impressive faux elephantiasis style results.

    there was a new buddy on at next shift.



    fact.




    how to get about the mountain without wrecking yer balls? snowmakers in the know use the Swiss Bob cause nobody needs nothin’ whackin’ ‘em in their crotch at speeds.

    Name:  A915FEA7-3214-4CDF-9B3E-1A5FD9A5B7A0.jpeg
Views: 218
Size:  29.0 KB

    kinda like this but at night.


    Fucking. Epic. Upstates. Post.
    I still call it The Jake.

  25. #8500
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    PNW -> MSO
    Posts
    7,889
    Woah.

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