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Thread: Things old guys say.
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05-29-2020, 04:39 PM #26Funky But Chic
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Google translate's not much help with that one: https://translate.google.com/?hl=en&...rwandte%20sein
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05-29-2020, 04:43 PM #27
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05-29-2020, 04:46 PM #28
It translates poorly, and maybe a german fluent mag can tell it better. It goes along the lines that it's only acceptable to be a dirty hound when you are a member of the pack. Dad would say it when he was being crude and a shit disturber after a couple drinks, and was called on it.
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05-29-2020, 05:03 PM #29serial lurker
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from an old marine gym teacher - Be smarter than the machine you operate, and the previously referenced, there are more horses' asses' than there are horses.
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05-29-2020, 05:03 PM #30
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05-29-2020, 05:52 PM #31
The only one I remember from my grandfather "capitalists should be lined up against a wall and shot" (That's a repeat, I know.)
I'm sure there were others from my grandparents and parents but they were all in Yiddish and I didn't understand them (that was the point).
I've always like "he couldn't pour piss out of a boot if you wrote the directions on the bottom". Also, as Levon Helm said about Robbie Robertson "I wouldn't piss up his asshole if his guts were on fire."
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05-29-2020, 05:56 PM #32
"The fuck you looking at"?
Or, "You couldn't say shit, even if you had a mouth full".
Or, "Fuck you and the horse you rode on in". I think I may have used that one here recently but I am kind of old.I have been in this State for 30 years and I am willing to admit that I am part of the problem.
"Happiest years of my life were earning < $8.00 and hour, collecting unemployment every spring and fall, no car, no debt and no responsibilities. 1984-1990 Park City UT"
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05-29-2020, 06:01 PM #33Registered User
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Liquor? I don't even know her!
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05-29-2020, 06:06 PM #34
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05-29-2020, 06:07 PM #35
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-52843846
In a sex fantasy gone wrong, two men with machetes entered the wrong house in New South Wales, Australia, before quickly realising their error.
One of them has now been acquitted of entering a home armed with a weapon in July 2019, Australian media report.
They had been hired to carry out a client's fantasy of being tied up in his underwear and stroked with a broom.
The judge concluded that "the facts of the case are unusual".
The role play was arranged over Facebook by a man near Griffith, New South Wales, who provided his address to the hired pair.
"He was willing to pay A$5,000 if it was 'really good'," the judge said.. . .
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05-29-2020, 06:41 PM #36Registered User
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My dad: "He didn't know whether to shit and go blind or squint and fart!"
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05-29-2020, 08:29 PM #37Registered User
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Didn't really know grand parents, and Dad was pretty milky, so I'll carry the family name being will into geezerdom:
Fuck you and the horse you rode in on always feels universally applicable.
But Core Shot's quoting Benny pretty much closed the thread.
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05-29-2020, 08:33 PM #38
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05-29-2020, 08:38 PM #39Registered User
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A coupleI have:
You get up in the morning all disheveled and grandpa says: look at what you see when you don’t have a gun
If you had a head you’d have an ass
Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums
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05-29-2020, 08:51 PM #40Funky But Chic
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05-29-2020, 08:52 PM #41Funky But Chic
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05-29-2020, 08:58 PM #42Registered User
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I’ll drop you like a bad habit!
Took me a few years to get a comeback: Bad habits are hard to drop, Dad.
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05-29-2020, 09:01 PM #43
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05-29-2020, 09:22 PM #44
If you lend your tools, the best you can do break even. My FIL. He was a German Guild cabinet maker. He had to make his own tools but it holds true.
You can paint a barn red or you can paint a barn yellow, it's still a barn. My old farmer neighbor. Said to his wife when she asked how he liked her new dress.A few people feel the rain. Most people just get wet.
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05-29-2020, 09:28 PM #45
You can wish in one hand and shit in the other.
See which one fills up first.
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05-30-2020, 06:31 AM #46
Where we goin ? "Over yonder"
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05-30-2020, 06:52 AM #47
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05-30-2020, 07:18 AM #48
My old lax coach (wisdom or surliness?): “balls move faster than assholes!”
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05-30-2020, 07:29 AM #49Banned
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One of my dad's favorites: "If the queen had balls, she would be king."
"If you can't beat 'em with brains, baffle 'em with bullshit."
"You're so full of shit your eyes are brown."
"There's some-dumb and plumb-dumb."
In reference to a woman in a bad mood: "someone needs to throw her some cock."
My 94 year old grandmother refers to dying as "getting planted in the marble orchard."
"If you're going to be a liar, you better have a damn good memory."
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05-30-2020, 07:30 AM #50
my old lax coach would love that one. Guy had the craziest North Shore accent
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