Somethin's fishy

[L82thegate]

It was April the 41st being a quadruple leap year.
I was driving in downtown Atlantis.
My Barracuda was in the shop, so I was in a rented Stingray and it was overheating so I pulled into a Shell station.
They said I'd blown a seal. I said fix the damn thing and leave my private life out of it, okay pal?
While they were doing that, I walked over to a place called the oyster bar, a real dive.
But I knew the owner, used to play for the Dolphins. I said Hi Gil !!
you hafta yell, he's hard of herring.
Gil was down on his luck. Fact is he was barely keeping his head below water.
I gullied up to the sandbar & he poured the usual. Rusty snail, hold the grunnion, shaken not stirred.
With a peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side - heavy on the Mako.
I slipped him a fin...on porpoise. I was feelin good, even dropped a sand dollar in the box for Jerry's squids, just for the halibut.
Well, the place was crowded. We were packed in like sardines.
They were all there to hear the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal...what sole!
Tommy was rocking the place with a very popular tuna, "Salmon Chanted Evening"
And the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers. Probably there to see the bass player.
One of them was this cute little yellowtail and she's giving me the eye.
So I figure this is my chance for a little fun, you know a piece of Pisces.
But she said things I just couldn't fathom. She was too deep and seemed to be under a lot of pressure.
Boy could she drink. She drank like a ....well, she drank a lot.
I said "What's your sign"? She said "Aquarium". I said "great, let's get tanked".
I invite her up to my place for a little midnight bait. Said "come on baby, it'll only take a few minnows". She threw me that same old line, "not tonight, I got a haddock".
And she wasn't kiddin' either cuz in came the biggest, meanest looking haddock I'd ever seen come down the pike.
He was covered with mussels.
He came over to me and says, "listen shrimp..don't you come trolling around here". What a crab!
The guy was steamed and I could see the anchor in his eyes.
I turned to him and said "Abalone - you're just being shellfish".
Well, I knew this was gonna be trouble and so did Gil cuz he was already on the phone with the cods.
The haddock hits me with a sucker punch. I catch him with a left hook & he eel's over.
It was a fluke but there he was, lying on the deck, flat as a mackerel...kelpless.
I said "forget the cods Gil, this guy's gonna need a sturgeon".
Well, the yellowtail was impressed with the way I landed her boyfriend. She came over to me and said "Hey big boy, you're really a game fish. What's your name"? I said "Marlin".
Well, from then on we had a whale of a time. I took her to dinner. I took her to dance. I bought her a bouquet of flounders and then went home with her. And what did I get for my trouble?
A case of clams!!

[iceman]

I have to admit I got caught up in it.

[L82thegate]

A little levity for these challenging times. A good story should always have a hook or two and net your interest.

[Buster Highmen]

Yo Z! you lurking or getting out?

[L82thegate]

Hey B, hope everyone's well your way. Just lurking voraciously about the area. Clearing some mtb trails, pond maintenance, gardens, wood splitting, and some car work to figure out. Big ass speed bump with these restrictions - hope things can turn for the better soon.

[skifishbum]

I approve of this post
its a what we do thing

[::: :::]

"living in a wet dream...swimming in the gulf stream"

or something like that, ha