Shopping for a religion

[Buster Highmen]

I'm as big a fan of the G&T as you'll find, but I'm not in the mood to start my own parish of a partially-engaged branch of Christianity, much less in Londonderry.

This is TR's bus. I'm gonna let him drive it.

And here I thought he was going through with this Unitarian h00haw, not the Congregationalism thing. I'm so confused now. Can you please clarify? Is there a manual?

[Timberridge]

This is TR's bus. I'm gonna let him drive it.

Correction. It's God's bus*, with complimentary Clorox wipes.

*Leased and operated by Ski Magic, LLC.

[BmillsSkier]

Correction. It's God's bus*, with complimentary Clorox wipes.

*Leased and operated by Ski Magic, LLC.

I'm ok with Jesus taking the wheel.

Will he make runs from Magic to the church though in time for margaritas?

[XXX-er]

Our lady of perpetual motion

[Timberridge]

That there is no lady, sir.

[hutash]

First off, you say you do not want any wierd religions...well. I posit that all religions are weird. Seriously, just thi k abiut the whole guy in the sky thing, and since you only seem to be considering western religions, think about the bastard who has his son killed to make a point.

If you still insist on joining, might I suggest Hinduism. You appear to have a fear of dying, so go with the reincarnation vibe. Dying just becomes a doddle, although you do risk coming back as a Mormon I suppose.

[isisis]

Pastafarianism...

[skaredshtles]

Pastafarianism...

This is the obvious, correct answer.

[KQ]

This is the obvious, correct answer.

and it has head gear!


Pastafarian protester wears a colander while showing an icon of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

Great stuff here:


Afterlife

The Pastafarian conception of Heaven includes a beer volcano and a stripper (or sometimes prostitute) factory.[38] The Pastafarian Hell is similar, except that the beer is stale and the strippers have sexually transmitted diseases.[40]

Pirates and global warming

According to Pastafarian beliefs, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians.[10] Furthermore, Pastafarians believe that the concept of pirates as "thieves and outcasts" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the Middle Ages and by Hare Krishnas. Instead, Pastafarians believe that they were "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who distributed candy to small children, adding that modern pirates are in no way similar to "the fun-loving buccaneers from history". In addition, Pastafarians believe that ghost pirates are responsible for all of the mysteriously lost ships and planes of the Bermuda Triangle. Pastafarians are among those who celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day on September 19.[41]

The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Henderson's original letter to the Kansas State Board of Education, in an effort to illustrate that correlation does not imply causation.[42] Henderson presented the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s".[10] A deliberately misleading graph accompanying the letter (with numbers humorously disordered on the x-axis) shows that as the number of pirates decreased, global temperatures increased. This parodies the suggestion from some religious groups that the high numbers of disasters, famines, and wars in the world is due to the lack of respect and worship toward their deity. In 2008, Henderson interpreted the growing pirate activities at the Gulf of Aden as additional support, pointing out that Somalia has "the highest number of pirates and the lowest carbon emissions of any country".[43]



Holidays
Pastafarian beliefs extend into lighthearted religious ceremony. Pastafarians celebrate every Friday as a holy day.[18] Prayers are concluded with a final declaration of affirmation, "R'amen" (or "rAmen"); the term is a parodic portmanteau of the terms "Amen" and "Ramen", referring to instant noodles and to the "noodly appendages" of their deity.[9]

Around the time of Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa, Pastafarians celebrate a vaguely defined holiday named "Holiday". Holiday does not take place on "a specific date so much as it is the Holiday season, itself". According to Henderson, as Pastafarians "reject dogma and formalism", there are no specific requirements for Holiday. Pastafarians celebrate Holiday in any manner they please.[44] Pastafarians also celebrate "Pastover" as a parody of Passover,[45][46][47] and "Ramendan" as a parody of Ramadan.[48][49][50]

Pastafarians interpret the increasing usage of "Happy Holidays", rather than more traditional greetings (such as "Merry Christmas"), as support for Pastafarianism.[44] In December 2005, George W. Bush's White House Christmas greeting cards wished people a happy "holiday season",[51] leading Henderson to write the President a note of thanks, including a "fish" emblem depicting the Flying Spaghetti Monster for his limousine or plane.[52] Henderson also thanked Walmart for its use of the phrase.[53]



U.S. Army ID tag (dog tag) listing "Atheist/FSM" as the religious/belief system preference



Touched by his noodly appendage

[SB]

Does pasta go with margaritas?

[XXX-er]

And they will go pasta agressive on you

thats where they under cook the spaghetti to fuck with yer digestive system

[OregonDead]

kinda late to this thread but beer and volcanoes? hmmmmmm. . .

and it has head gear!


Pastafarian protester wears a colander while showing an icon of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

Great stuff here:


Afterlife

The Pastafarian conception of Heaven includes a beer volcano and a stripper (or sometimes prostitute) factory.[38] The Pastafarian Hell is similar, except that the beer is stale and the strippers have sexually transmitted diseases.[40]

Pirates and global warming

According to Pastafarian beliefs, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians.[10] Furthermore, Pastafarians believe that the concept of pirates as "thieves and outcasts" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the Middle Ages and by Hare Krishnas. Instead, Pastafarians believe that they were "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who distributed candy to small children, adding that modern pirates are in no way similar to "the fun-loving buccaneers from history". In addition, Pastafarians believe that ghost pirates are responsible for all of the mysteriously lost ships and planes of the Bermuda Triangle. Pastafarians are among those who celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day on September 19.[41]

The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Henderson's original letter to the Kansas State Board of Education, in an effort to illustrate that correlation does not imply causation.[42] Henderson presented the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s".[10] A deliberately misleading graph accompanying the letter (with numbers humorously disordered on the x-axis) shows that as the number of pirates decreased, global temperatures increased. This parodies the suggestion from some religious groups that the high numbers of disasters, famines, and wars in the world is due to the lack of respect and worship toward their deity. In 2008, Henderson interpreted the growing pirate activities at the Gulf of Aden as additional support, pointing out that Somalia has "the highest number of pirates and the lowest carbon emissions of any country".[43]



Holidays
Pastafarian beliefs extend into lighthearted religious ceremony. Pastafarians celebrate every Friday as a holy day.[18] Prayers are concluded with a final declaration of affirmation, "R'amen" (or "rAmen"); the term is a parodic portmanteau of the terms "Amen" and "Ramen", referring to instant noodles and to the "noodly appendages" of their deity.[9]

Around the time of Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa, Pastafarians celebrate a vaguely defined holiday named "Holiday". Holiday does not take place on "a specific date so much as it is the Holiday season, itself". According to Henderson, as Pastafarians "reject dogma and formalism", there are no specific requirements for Holiday. Pastafarians celebrate Holiday in any manner they please.[44] Pastafarians also celebrate "Pastover" as a parody of Passover,[45][46][47] and "Ramendan" as a parody of Ramadan.[48][49][50]

Pastafarians interpret the increasing usage of "Happy Holidays", rather than more traditional greetings (such as "Merry Christmas"), as support for Pastafarianism.[44] In December 2005, George W. Bush's White House Christmas greeting cards wished people a happy "holiday season",[51] leading Henderson to write the President a note of thanks, including a "fish" emblem depicting the Flying Spaghetti Monster for his limousine or plane.[52] Henderson also thanked Walmart for its use of the phrase.[53]



U.S. Army ID tag (dog tag) listing "Atheist/FSM" as the religious/belief system preference



Touched by his noodly appendage

[BmillsSkier]

Does pasta go with margaritas?

No. No it doesn’t.

Fish tacos or GtFO

Amen.

[SB]

Ok, thanks for that ruling.

[My Pet Powder Goat]

I'm Agnostic. That way I can never be wrong

Sent from my SM-N960U using TGR Forums mobile app

[OregonDead]

Not a member but as a student of religious philosophy I'd think that margaritas do fit with overall theme of pastafarianism. Some of the other beverages have their own holidays but I have to think they are down with the tequila and limes too. Looks like 3 different holidays with rum in the name of the holiday. Lots of holidays so if you like the holidays this might be the one https://pastafarians.org.au/pastafarianism/holidays/

[riser4]

Red wine goes better with pasta.

[Timberridge]

This thing is spreading. If you're over 65 or a long time Camel smoker now's the time to think about preparing for the afterlife.

[glademaster]

I thought the Camel smokers had more to be worried about from MERS than the Rat Flu.

[ill-advised strategy]

[BmillsSkier]

Timberridge, will you be cancelling services now in an effort to slow the spread of this disease?

And will the bus to Magic keep running?

[SB]

Well since this is a religion prepping for the after life the bus will eventually run out of customers.

Happy virus everyone!

[OregonDead]

Red wine goes better with pasta.

I am seeing 6 different wine specific holidays on the list. Red wine day is coming up on soon on March 24th so it is time to stock up

[The Reverend Floater]

Personally, I like to think that believing in Physics is a safe bet.

[Dantheman]

Personally, I like to think that believing in Physics is a safe bet.

I'm down with the idea that consciousness is just an emergent property of basic biology and when we die we just wink out without ever knowing we ever existed. Seems more plausible than most conceptions of an afterlife, especially in the face of things like proton decay and the inconceivable enormity of time.