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  1. #26
    Join Date
    Oct 2016
    Posts
    924
    Quote Originally Posted by ill-advised strategy View Post
    I want to actually be fast, so running it in clothes is out.


    School me on being very fast for very cheap.
    You've really left yourself with only one option and lucky for you wearing nothing is also very cheap

  2. #27
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Fraggle Rock, CO
    Posts
    7,767
    Tyvek suit would be pretty sweet. I got one this Halloween for one of my kids and it had to fancy orange seam tape that have it a very hazmat kind of feel. Pair it with a snorkel/mask, multicolored clown wig glued to an old helmet, and some Mardi gras beads with the plastic tits on them for the full effect.
    Brandine: Now Cletus, if I catch you with pig lipstick on your collar one more time you ain't gonna be allowed to sleep in the barn no more!
    Cletus: Duly noted.

  3. #28
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Missoula, MT
    Posts
    22,462
    Quote Originally Posted by Timberridge View Post
    How long is a downhill in Michigan? Long enough to even worry about wind drag?
    I feel like this is a fair question.
    As for your surf outfit: your calves and ankles will be in your socks and boots. Might just work. Plus some hockey pads.
    No longer stuck.

    Quote Originally Posted by stuckathuntermtn View Post
    Just an uneducated guess.

  4. #29
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    YetiMan
    Posts
    13,370
    Quote Originally Posted by Timberridge View Post
    How long is a downhill in Michigan? Long enough to even worry about wind drag?
    40ish seconds. There’s a glide through a long(ish) flat, so aero matters.

    I’ll try to take and post a gopro of the approximate course tomorrow.

  5. #30
    Join Date
    Jul 2015
    Posts
    475
    Quote Originally Posted by OregonDead View Post
    You've really left yourself with only one option and lucky for you wearing nothing is also very cheap
    ^ Shane would approve this message

  6. #31
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    The greatest N. New Mexico resort in Colorado
    Posts
    2,188
    Forty seconds is plenty long enough to justify a speed suit.

    I say fuck anything breathable, just go saran wrap. Otherwise you're going to have to run bare-ass and shave everything. Hundies matter.

  7. #32
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Among Greatness All Around
    Posts
    6,628
    Quote Originally Posted by Mustonen View Post
    I’m in for $20 if we can find something suitably vintage and/or ridiculous for IAS to wear that’s actually a little functional.
    We need to know what size he needs for a start of this search...

  8. #33
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Alpental
    Posts
    6,565
    Quote Originally Posted by ZomblibulaX View Post
    Forty seconds is plenty long enough to justify a speed suit.

    I say fuck anything breathable, just go saran wrap. Otherwise you're going to have to run bare-ass and shave everything. Hundies matter.
    For sure bare ass AND wrapped in saran is the right call and wrap on a couple of spatulas for body armor, just make sure to tuck.
    Move upside and let the man go through...

  9. #34
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    LV-426
    Posts
    21,126
    Quote Originally Posted by Mofro261 View Post
    For sure bare ass AND wrapped in saran is the right call and wrap on a couple of spatulas for body armor, just make sure to tuck.. .
    ... in your balls.
    Quote Originally Posted by powder11 View Post
    if you have to resort to taking advice from the nitwits on this forum, then you're doomed.

  10. #35
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Among Greatness All Around
    Posts
    6,628
    Quote Originally Posted by ::: ::: View Post
    jeans, gaiters & a CB jacket

    or goat skin chaps
    The chaps will be very cold on the ride up with your but cheeks on the chair with bare skin (since chaps are ass-less always) - unless you wear a base layer also (so you need to probably have a pair of racing shorts that you wear to the start area.) Then have to find someone to bring them down to the bottom of the course....

    If you fall then the brush burn of hitting a gate would probably feel like great vs the snow burn sliding down the hill half nakid.

    Same for the suggestion of wear nothing at all and ski the race in your birthday suit.

  11. #36
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    burblandia
    Posts
    410
    Old XL GS suit taking up space in the closet...It's red (fast!) and padded (shred at will!)

    PM me your address and I'll send it your way, yours for free. But you better win.

    Click image for larger version. 

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    Might not make as much of an impression as the previously mentioned options though.
    Our great works of human enterprise will fade away with time. The mountain will endure. ~nps

  12. #37
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    YetiMan
    Posts
    13,370
    Nice!
    Red!
    I feel like there’s no way I’m going to fit in that. I’m 6’3 240(?)
    Sadly, I bought the biggest size flylow bibs last year on sale and I haven’t worn them until this week because I’m too fat and didn’t have the heart to cut them until this week.

    Feel like spyder xl is gonna be fatguy in a little coat. :-)

  13. #38
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    South Central
    Posts
    745
    Don’t those suits stretch yo? Give the XL a try.

  14. #39
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Fraggle Rock, CO
    Posts
    7,767
    Northway's suit is tits. Gosh, I wish I had a reason to own something like that. It's even red. Damn. You'd never be able to set your poles down at lunch cuz you'd need them at the ready to defend yourself against the horde of randy skier chicks that instinctively crave your seed when they saw you sauntering up to the bar for a frosty pint after you'd finished crushing all the fruity non red speed suit wearing punk ass little man children in the super g.
    Brandine: Now Cletus, if I catch you with pig lipstick on your collar one more time you ain't gonna be allowed to sleep in the barn no more!
    Cletus: Duly noted.

  15. #40
    Join Date
    Dec 2018
    Location
    DownEast
    Posts
    3,240
    If no one else will make use of it and the offer still stands, I would give northway’s suit a proper home. Promise pics of letting fly in my Sx91’s and Kastle DH boards.

  16. #41
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Ventura Highway in the Sunshine
    Posts
    22,431
    Can't you just use the "Flexseal Family of Products"? The advertising potential is huge and you might just get spancered.

    I agree it is a constitutional right for Americans to be assholes...its just too bad that so many take the opportunity...
    iscariot

  17. #42
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    2,625
    Plastidip might be the solution. I'm surprised XXXer hasn't come in to suggest Aquaseal yet.

  18. #43
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Vallee Teton
    Posts
    2,586
    Some of the neoprene fleece suits for diving?
    Aggressive in my own mind

  19. #44
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    YetiMan
    Posts
    13,370
    Quote Originally Posted by ill-advised strategy View Post
    40ish seconds. There’s a glide through a long(ish) flat, so aero matters.

    I’ll try to take and post a gopro of the approximate course tomorrow.
    believe me, I'm not trying to say this is teh gnarz.
    just answering the inquiry:
    here's today with clothes and slow skis.

  20. #45
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    South Central
    Posts
    745
    There’s no replacement for displacement

  21. #46
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    on the banks of Fish Creek
    Posts
    7,514
    click them poles......

  22. #47
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    1,887
    That's the most speed I've ever seen on a Nordic course. Well done. Sorry about the whole Michigan thing.

    Definitely take the suit. It'll fit. That's the destiny of this thread, clearly.

  23. #48
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    The greatest N. New Mexico resort in Colorado
    Posts
    2,188
    That spyder suit will fit, it just might be a pain in the ass to zip up and give you some horrific moose knuckle. I recommend stuffing a cucumber in there so the ladies know what’s up.

  24. #49
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Among Greatness All Around
    Posts
    6,628
    Quote Originally Posted by ill-advised strategy View Post
    Nice!
    Red!
    I feel like there’s no way I’m going to fit in that. I’m 6’3 240(?)
    Sadly, I bought the biggest size flylow bibs last year on sale and I haven’t worn them until this week because I’m too fat and didn’t have the heart to cut them until this week.

    Feel like spyder xl is gonna be fatguy in a little coat. :-)
    Depends on how well worn the XL is. I have a Spyder XL GS suit. Picked it up used off Ebay that was a bit worn when I got it. Now it does not have much as much stretch to it. I'm 6 ft tall but usually under 180 pounds. It is baggy on me now. Suspect a well worn XL would fit you- especially if it is a one and done (and hopefully a Win) race.

  25. #50
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    northern BC
    Posts
    30,885
    Before I got my own speed suit off the teen age son of a ski bud I used to borrow a speed suit off the daughter of another ski bud

    It had the zipper at the back

    I now know why women go to the washroom together
    Lee Lau - xxx-er is the laziest Asian canuck I know

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