Fear and Loathing, a Rat Flu Odyssey

[Toadman]

Sorry if this has been posted, but JFC... Trump's got powers, we don't even know about.

By Jan Wolfe

WASHINGTON, March 12 (Reuters) - U.S. President Donald Trump on Thursday said he may declare the coronavirus pandemic an emergency by invoking a law known as the Stafford Act.

The following explains how the Stafford Act works and what powers a declaration would unlock.



WHAT IS THE STAFFORD ACT?

The law, enacted in 1988, empowers the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) to assist state and local governments during "natural catastrophes" and coordinate the nation's response.

FEMA, an agency within the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, controls more than $40 billion in federal funding set aside by Congress for disaster relief. FEMA could use that funding to help build medical facilities and transport patients, among other measures.

Only the president can declare a major disaster under the law.

"We have very strong emergency powers under the Stafford Act," Trump told reporters in the Oval Office on Thursday. "I have it memorized, practically, as to the powers in that act. And if I need to do something, I'll do it. I have the right to do a lot of things that people don't even know about."

[4matic]

"But it said, 'STANFORD HOSPITAL BOARD INTERNAL MESSAGE' right in the email!!"

-Some Fucking Boomer:

Maybe Alan Stanford. He’s a boomer.

[Thaleia]

It's all about the squat and cheek spread

Toilets are over rated
If you eat right your turds come out in chunks not slime and spew
If needed never use a leaf but grab a stick to brush off dingle berries

Can you just stop with this?

[BmillsSkier]

Whole Foods is LIT AS FUCK!

[I Skied Bandini Mountain]

Sorry if this has been posted, but JFC... Trump's got powers, we don't even know about.

By Jan Wolfe

WASHINGTON, March 12 (Reuters) - U.S. President Donald Trump on Thursday said he may declare the coronavirus pandemic an emergency by invoking a law known as the Stafford Act.

The following explains how the Stafford Act works and what powers a declaration would unlock.



WHAT IS THE STAFFORD ACT?

The law, enacted in 1988, empowers the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) to assist state and local governments during "natural catastrophes" and coordinate the nation's response.

FEMA, an agency within the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, controls more than $40 billion in federal funding set aside by Congress for disaster relief. FEMA could use that funding to help build medical facilities and transport patients, among other measures.

Only the president can declare a major disaster under the law.

"We have very strong emergency powers under the Stafford Act," Trump told reporters in the Oval Office on Thursday. "I have it memorized, practically, as to the powers in that act. And if I need to do something, I'll do it. I have the right to do a lot of things that people don't even know about."

FEMA camps!

[glademaster]

Panic buying is going to single-handedly save the the consumer economy.

[Toadman]

[skaredshtles]

Whole Foods is LIT AS FUCK!

I could live for an entire year on pasta and wine.

[Meadow Skipper]

So, is this a case of an idiot overreacting, or an idiot that finally couldn’t ignore reality?
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/whi...virus-n1156371

[Toadman]

It's just the case of a bible thumping idiot who is just an idiot.

[Danno]

The University had it's first positive test today. Shit is getting real.

[glademaster]

My office mates are still on the "it's no different from any other cold" kick, while also bragging about how much TP they've stockpiled. The highest count I've heard today is 148 rolls. The same person also claimed to have 6 gallons of hand sanitizer. But she's not worried, and this whole things it being blown out of proportion. Multiple people with nasty, hacking coughs coming into work every day, cracking jokes about synchronizing their coughs from across the open office.

FFS.

[DaveTV]

Anyone here test positive yet for this? I am worried about Wooley, at his advanced age and all..

[evdog]

NHL suspended. You know when rome was in decline the plebes were entertained by gladiators. What are we going to occupy our time with, without sports?

Reinstate bum wars?

Except this time make it literally bum wars. Throw some TP rolls from your stockpile towards a costco lineup and watch people brawl over them.

[Rideski]

Top 100 vector occupations in no particular order


1. Grub hub delivery driver
2. Fast food worker
3..

[MultiVerse]

Say you're in Walla Walla and you're wondering what the risk is of an infected person attending your yoga class?

Assuming the virus spreads randomly and Wall Walla has a population (p) of 33,000, and there are 100 coronavirus carriers (c), and the yoga group (g) has 30 people then paste this equation into https://www.wolframalpha.com/ and you get a 9% chance at least one person is infected:

p=33000, c=100, g=30, 100*(1-1(1-c/p)^g) //N



Where things get interesting is if you increase the number of attendees, even if there's the same number of overall carriers in town, the risk skyrockets. So with g=100 the risk rises to 26%, with g=500 the risk rises to 78%.


What's crazy is if the entire USA has 20,000 infected people then for a large event like a playoff game or the March Madness finals the odds become more than 99%:

p=330000000, c=20000, g=100000, 100*(1-1(1-c/p)^g) //N


More here:https://twitter.com/joshuasweitz/sta...218177026?s=20

[BmillsSkier]

I could live for an entire year on pasta and wine.

Apparently no one like bucatini (cause that was all that’s left) or noticed the WF rack of wine on sale for 2.99 a bottle. I bought a case and dude next to me was like we’re the only ones in here with our priorities straight.

And to think I just popped in for a bottle of sauce and a box of pasta to go with the meatballs we got from the butcher earlier.

It was a wild scene.

[skaredshtles]

Apparently no one like bucatini

That's because the world is full of uncultured swine.

[BmillsSkier]

That's because the world is full of uncultured swine.

Amen.

[splat]

God forbid people do some reading to educate themselves about the virus.

[skaredshtles]

Amen.

I finally found a source of guanciale in town, so I can now make Amatriciana... and "real" carbonara.

[schindlerpiste]

WWMD: My son (age 20) has a red-eye flight tomorrow to FLL. Right now, we are a bit concerned about flying. To me, airplanes are germ hotels. He has asked me to consider driving him to school in Miami. This 2700 mile trip would require 2 nights each way at hotels and multiple restaurant/truck stops along the way. I have a great car that loves long trips, and I don't mind the drive. Do I give up 10 days to give my son, wife and me peace of mind?

[Core Shot]

Moot point. His schools cancelled already

[splat]

It's just like the regular flu....remember?

[KQ]

Well hot damn! The place that gave us our first positive case of CV19 is still going to hold their gun show!