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Thread: Royal Caribbean/cruise rant
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07-19-2019, 10:11 AM #1Banned
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Royal Caribbean/cruise rant
So first cruise here. Father in law guessed we should all go on a "vacation". Ok he footing the bill, mostly (get to that later). Royal Caribbean allure of the Seas.
First off this was booked a year ago. I have never even remotely liked the idea of a cruise. I'm a resort guy, all inclusive style. I was apprehensive about the motion of the boat, quickly dispelled. I was a bit unnerved about not seeing land for days at a time (that didn't go away). The ports are tourist traps. The excursions way over priced, and the onboard services kinda suck imho. 6000 people locked on the ocean. 3 pools that are small, so when at sea and everyone on boat you literally get 2.5ft of space to "swim". FIL didn't go all in so no drinks, I paid for flight from NY to Florida. Paying for tips on ship, so this is far from a free vacation and with what I'm out of pocket I could've had a vacation I actually wanted. Limited kids stuff. If you're into "shows" there are plenty, but kids? Not really into it. Pools close at like 9pm. Wall to wall people on at sea days. No escape.
So cruise is St Kitts, San Juan, and Nassau Bahamas. Orig schedule 1 yr ago was no San Juan but at Thomas, but due to engine issues san Juan was the pick. So you all know the crap I'm San Juan. Day before we docked 2 other royal Caribbean ships diverted and didn't go for "passenger safety", yet a day later we dock there? My safety isn't important? View off boat and reports from others. CNN on dock, police everywhere (visible from ship) graffiti and broken windows abound. 6 ship docks, we were the only ship there. The entire stay was 7am to 1pm. Fucking bullshit.
The staff is great. That's the only plus. Didn't get drink package day one so you're fucked. Just didn't think I could consume $800 in booze between me and the wife in 8 days. Oh there's 18% tacked onto that $800 as well.
There's more but I have to go pretend I'm enjoying myself even though I am in hell.
Sorry for the rant and random paragraphs.
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07-19-2019, 10:15 AM #2
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07-19-2019, 10:21 AM #3
I'm not normally a stickler for grammar and spelling and shit, but that was really hard to read. Overall impression: you're on a cruise and not happy. Details? I have no idea.
"fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
"She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
"everybody's got their hooks into you, fuck em....forge on motherfuckers, drag all those bitches across the goal line with you." - (not so) ill-advised strategy
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07-19-2019, 10:23 AM #4
As long as no one is shooting at you or trying to blow you up its easy.
watch out for snakes
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07-19-2019, 10:25 AM #5
All I took from this is you are a lightweight if you don't think 2 people could blow through 50 bucks a day each on booze while on vacation.
Live Free or Die
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07-19-2019, 10:27 AM #6
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth!
It makes perfect sense...until you think about it.
I suspect there's logic behind the madness, but I'm too dumb to see it.
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07-19-2019, 10:28 AM #7Registered User
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You just took one for the team and hopefully you can get a few get out of jail passes for your troubles. I have passed on attending the annual "family reunion" for the wife's family after 18 years and it's a glorious week to myself at home.
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07-19-2019, 10:31 AM #8
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07-19-2019, 10:34 AM #9
I did an Alaskan cruise, last of the season so the sea got pretty heavy. The people we were assigned to eat dinner with never made it to dinner the last night. Some of the excursions were cool--whale watching, kayaking in some very heavy seas where if anyone had flipped they would have died (no one flipped). We were supposed to helicopter to ice climb on a glacier but it was canceled. They said weather--I think they took a look at the average weight of the passengers and decided the helicopter couldn't handle it;
I won't do another cruise, but I'm glad to have seen the Inside Passage.
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07-19-2019, 10:37 AM #10
Life is hard and tough.
Keep your head up kid, it gets better.
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07-19-2019, 10:42 AM #11
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07-19-2019, 10:48 AM #12
Cruise = Floating Chinese Buffet
Samuel L. Jackson as Jules Winnfield: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I break your concentration?
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07-19-2019, 10:50 AM #13
We were gifted an all inclusive week in MX once and it wasn't that much fun, as there was little to do but drink. On the other hand we did a few Club Med holidays that were the best as there was so much to do each day. So maybe activities are the secret to vacation bliss? 8 days on a boat would likely bore me to tears.
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07-19-2019, 10:52 AM #14
Nothing excites me about cruises other than the endless seafood buffet. And nothing frightens me more either, except maybe icebergs but they'll all be gone soon enough.
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07-19-2019, 11:27 AM #15Banned
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It does and when I say all inclusive think club med style. All activities included. 18 hole golf free scuba free snorkel free. Then add the fact that I can, if I choose, leave the resort and explore the island. Cruise? Not so much.
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07-19-2019, 11:40 AM #16Banned
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Not really interested in dealing with my kids all day hungover. I did mention there are no real activities for youngish kids, so mom and dad are the "entertainment" makes it all the more relaxing.
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07-19-2019, 11:41 AM #17Registered User
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07-19-2019, 11:43 AM #18I've concluded that DJSapp was never DJSapp, and Not DJSapp is also not DJSapp, so that means he's telling the truth now and he was lying before.
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07-19-2019, 11:48 AM #19
I think a dispensary on a cruise line would do a steady business.
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07-19-2019, 11:54 AM #20Registered User
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07-19-2019, 11:57 AM #21
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07-19-2019, 12:00 PM #22
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07-19-2019, 12:13 PM #23
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07-19-2019, 12:38 PM #24
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07-19-2019, 12:44 PM #25
^^ the outside of that boat look like this?
"timberridge is terminally vapid" -- a fortune cookie in Yueyang
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