Results 51 to 75 of 798
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06-20-2019, 03:12 PM #51
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06-20-2019, 03:13 PM #52
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06-20-2019, 03:15 PM #53Funky But Chic
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- The Cone of Uncertainty
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^^ Sounds like the start of a Seinfeld bit.
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06-20-2019, 03:18 PM #54“When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis
Kindness is a bridge between all people
Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism
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06-20-2019, 03:19 PM #55Funky But Chic
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- The Cone of Uncertainty
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ha, I read it as "Chinese" not "Christians".
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06-20-2019, 03:21 PM #56
Imagine if14 year old jewish girl from Brooklyn got pregnant today under the following conditions-
-She swears that she's still a virgin
-Her arranged marriage fiancee swears he didn't knock her up, in fact he had a dream where an angel told him that god got her pregnant
-She has the kid
-She, her now husband and her family refuse to allow a DNA test to reveal who the real father is
-The kid is purported to be the messiah by his extended family and his church. You are told that to the only way to salvation is to worship this kid
-You aren't allowed to ask logical questions about the circumstances that led to the 14 year old girl getting pregnant or else you risk eternal damnation. You must instead have faith in the story told by the 14 year old jewish girl and her family.
Would you believe her story?
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06-20-2019, 03:24 PM #57
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06-20-2019, 03:29 PM #58“When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis
Kindness is a bridge between all people
Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism
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06-20-2019, 03:34 PM #59Registered User
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- Feb 2014
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- 2,492
I like telling the joke about the Baptist found on a deserted island living solo for years to describe the church scene in my town. His rescuers ask why he has 3 buildings, "that one is my house, that one is my church, and the last one is the church I used to go to."
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06-20-2019, 03:38 PM #60
I dunno. But the ones that believed this story were maggots.
Maggots.
The disciples were the equivalent of TGR maggots.
Those who believed were not rich, wealthy, well-connected, political masters, famous persons, or such ..
They were lower than blue collar fisherman.
Temp workers with a rough side that was STRAIGHT UP.
They were the ones that really knew a fucking lie and smelled it a mile away.
And they skied that run till their terrible deaths.
All of them died for that ski run.
An avalanche of hate from the fucking religious elite.
The fucking cucking elite and religious people ... tortured and killed them all.
Jesus commanded them to love those that hate them and bless those that persecute them.
Not bad for a bastard child or a lowly carpenter if you ask me.
That being said - No one with a pregnant belly insists they are a virgin.
That would be unbelievable and the person would be considered insane.
And no guy would marry a Mary that was both a cheater and insane.
So, in a strange kind of way, it is believable.
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06-20-2019, 03:42 PM #61
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06-20-2019, 03:45 PM #62
Jesus
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06-20-2019, 03:46 PM #63
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06-20-2019, 03:47 PM #64
I've got a good one:
A cardinal comes rushing in to where the Pope is praying, out of breath he excitedly says:
"Sorry to disturb you your excellency but I have news, it is both wonderful and bad." The Pope sits silent for a moment gathering his thoughts and finally says "let us start with the good news first."
"Oh it truly is most wonderful news!" uttered the cardinal excitedly, "it is Jesus, he is on the phone and wishes to speak with you!"
The Pope can hardly believe his ears. He is filled with elation and excitement but also confused as to what could possibly be bad about such a phone call and presses his cardinal for the rest of the message.
The cardinal hesitates and when he continues his voice is low and no longer filled with excitement "Well you see your excellency." the cardinal stammers, "he's calling from Salt Lake City."
“When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis
Kindness is a bridge between all people
Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism
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06-20-2019, 03:53 PM #65
Heh...good one
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06-20-2019, 03:55 PM #66
Oh. Right. Died exiled on The Isle of Patmos after writing the most sobering, scary, and yet hopeful interpretive literary piece ever conceived.
Something about Roman Empires, Believers, The Reign and Fall and Doom of Evil and cowardice.
Something about history, past, present and future.
Something about commercialism, materialism, sexual slavery and prostitution of all kinds.
Something about fire and swords and horses and 2nd chances.
Something that can make people do crazy shit in the name of God.
Something that can make people cry and actually turn to God and stop doing the crazy shit they have already been doing.
John .... a maggot that loved skiing that Jesus Double Black ski run,
and was forced to spend the rest of his life on a little island
in the middle of Lake Tahoe
... surrounded by land occupied by those that had everything except vision
.. and had big houses they didn't live in
But he was on an island, a cave, all alone,
and found a pen and wrote what he thought God spoke through him.
And holy fucking motherfucking fuck. What a fucking story!
They'll make films about it one day.
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06-20-2019, 03:55 PM #67“When you see something that is not right, not just, not fair, you have a moral obligation to say something. To do something." Rep. John Lewis
Kindness is a bridge between all people
Dunkin’ Donuts Worker Dances With Customer Who Has Autism
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06-20-2019, 04:01 PM #68
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06-20-2019, 04:13 PM #69
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06-20-2019, 04:14 PM #70
Well the thread title has been confirmed.
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06-20-2019, 04:19 PM #71
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06-20-2019, 04:24 PM #72Forum Cross Pollinator, gratuitously strident
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06-20-2019, 04:27 PM #73
I’m not saying Christianity correlates with stupidity, but...
Jesus H Christ. Does everything have to be a story about something else or a metaphor? Can’t it just be the thing, or somebody’s bad translation of the metaphor thing?
No.Well maybe I'm the faggot America
I'm not a part of a redneck agenda
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06-20-2019, 04:30 PM #74
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06-20-2019, 04:31 PM #75Registered User
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- Mar 2008
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- northern BC
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back in the day I had a job at Exhibition park in Vancover working at the p-lot for the horse track but once a year the JW's would have their big convention at the agrodome so they got mixed in with the track people .
One the guys pointed out " you can easily tell which is which cuz the drunks go where they want and yell out the widow at you but those JW's you could direct off a cliff "Lee Lau - xxx-er is the laziest Asian canuck I know
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