My kid says she was sexually harassed at school.....

[ill-advised strategy]

Look what showed up at casa del yeti yesterday...



Timely.

[Bobby Stainless]

Sometimes violence is the answer. Sometimes it gets you a felony.

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/...ly/2920746002/

[ill-advised strategy]

My point in bringing the families back together some time later (if SHE was ok with it) is to show that people, especially stupid hormonally jacked up kids can grow and learn from their experience. That he has a family that cares about him and vice versa, and all us parents are trying

When I was 13 my mom initiated a multifamily dinner like this. We get there and everyone brought food so there’s way too much food. 13 year olds everywhere, my mom remarks: WOW THIS IS LIKE AN ORGY OF FOOD!

That happened.

I say let that lil gal scrap it out at school with the fake news and the Bart O’Kavannaugh Jr’s until she specifically asks for help or guidance.
Or you can have a food orgy, whatever... #notmykid

[mtngirl79]

Kids are often embarrassed to tell their parents they are being bullied so pay attention in the next few weeks.

[goldengatestinx]

Or Harvey, Fairfax, Franken, Kennedy x 2, it's on both sides

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Why is Kavanagh even in this discussion...he was falsely accused by a political machine and found innocent. Some find it acceptable. But it is not.

[wooley12]

No, not really.

[Supermoon]

Why is Kavanagh even in this discussion...he was falsely accused by a political machine and found innocent. Some find it acceptable. But it is not.

So you came into this thread to... checks notes.... defend rapists and abusers?

[TahoeJ]

Why is Kavanagh even in this discussion...he was falsely accused by a political machine and found innocent. Some find it acceptable. But it is not.

Never go full retard.

[SumJongGuy]

Glad the kid was literally caught red handed. I wouldn't begin to assume that the shenanigans are over though. Can't think of many occasions where being caught and punished after being reported ended the harassment of the people reporting the crime. Kids need to stick together and stand up for each other when one of the group is attacked, all of the group should step up and support/defend the victim. Sounds like the girl has that covered. Just ride it out. it will eventually settle down.

[SumJongGuy]

Why is Kavanagh even in this discussion...he was falsely accused by a political machine and found innocent. Some find it acceptable. But it is not.

If there had been some video to surface proving the allegations, you'd still be defending him as long as it furthers your anti gay, anti Muslim, anti equality for all agenda.

[mtngirl79]

If there had been some video to surface proving the allegations, you'd still be defending him as long as it furthers your anti gay, anti Muslim, anti equality for all agenda.

Lack of a conviction does not equal false allegations.

[The Reverend Floater]

Props to Mustonen and his daughter.......I have twin 13 y/o girls, and they both go to public school, and it's WAY more FUBAR'd then when any of us were walking the halls, trust me. IDK who said it upthread, but the girl on girl drama is nucking futs, for sure. One thing I've always drilled into my daughters heads, is you stick up for your sister no matter what; they fight like fucking banshees some days, but under no circumstances do they stand by and watch the other one get shit from anybody... Which is why last year I went and picked up Thing One from school for punching a seventh grade boy in the nose who was harassing Thing Two (pushing her, calling her 'fuckface', etc)...She was crying and asking if she was in trouble, cause she got suspended for a day; I took her out to lunch and we went for a hike on her suspension day. DJSapp called it. Fuck those little bastards. I blame rap music.

That’s what the fuck I’m talking about.

[Chugachjed]

Never go full retard.

Goldengatestinx never fails to go full retard

[bagtagley]

He's a really really good mogul skier though.

This is no joke. I watched him arc big, fast turns down West Rustler like it was groomed. I dropped in and quickly realized as I got my ass handed to me that it was a bumpy mess.

[Bunion 2020]

She was crying and asking if she was in trouble, cause she got suspended for a day; I took her out to lunch and we went for a hike on her suspension day.

Now that is quality dad work.

[Long duc dong]

Lack of a conviction does not equal false allegations.

The same way that just because an allegation is not 'proven' false does not mean it is proven true.

The 3% statistic has been thrown around a bit in this thread. I have not read all the way through, so I don't know if anyone has addressed what that actually means. I have heard that the number is 2%, but each time I hear people quote it they always include the word 'proven.' That is very significant, and based on some of the responses I can tell that most people don't really know what it means. JUST BECAUSE AN ALLEGATION IS NOT PROVEN FALSE DOES NOT MEAN IT IS TRUE. It means it COULD be true, or it could be false, just that it is not definitely false. That does not equate to definitely true. Whenever I have examined these studies, in other cases it was 2%, not three, it basically comes down to allegations that are proven false, the study does not actually say that 98% of allegations are definitely true, but many people reading the results interpret it that way. It is VERY hard to prove an allegation false. I graduated from college around 20 years ago. If I was to accuse a woman of blowing me while I was passed out that allegation would likely NOT go under the heading of proven false. It is possible the girl in question might have an alibi, a plane ticket or a hotel receipt from said weekend, but the authorities would likely not press charges or look into it all that seriously, they would conclude it was likely false, but it would NOT go into the category of proven false. In every case that I have looked into regarding these statistics that is what I have found. Perhaps the person who posted the 3% statistic could cite a source? I would like to look at the study and examine the methodology. Usually what happens is that someone cites a study that says that 2% (or 3%) of sexual assault claims are proven false, then someone takes that and misinterprets it, concluding that false sexual assault claims are very rare, not understanding the importance of the word 'proven' being included. The negation of proven false is not true, it is NOT proven false. That is a big difference. I would love to examine the study the poster is quoting.

It is much the same as when people claim women get paid 78 cents on the dollar for doing the same job. At one time women were making 78 cents on the dollar compared to men, I don't know if that is still true, but that is based on what is essentially a simple linear regression model. In order for women to be paid 78 cents on the dollar for doing the same job, profession MUST be included in the regression model, or the way professions are distributed must be uniform between men and women, which is obviously NOT the case. The people making that claim and attaching the 'for doing the same job' do not understand what it really means, yet it is repeated ad nauseum all over the place even though it is axiomatically incorrect. For the record the effect of gender also has a very specific meaning, and it is not 22 cents on the dollar. When confounding factors are taken into account the 78 cents on the dollar statistic holds no water.

The fact that 3% of assault allegations, if that is what the study says, are proven false is not evidence (necessarily) that false accusations are rare. It is evidence that it is very rare for an accusation to be proven false, not for an accusation to ACTUALLY be false. Unless the accused has exculpatory evidence it is VERY difficult to prove an accusation false. Most rape accusations do not get successfully prosecuted. That is evidence that a successful rape prosecution is rare, NOT that rape itself is rare.

It would be nice if the poster could link the study where he/she got the three percent figure. I want to see the ACTUAL study, not a summary. If would like to examine the methodology, specifically how they quantify what a false accusation is.

We will probably never know how many rape accusations are valid and how many are not. It is next to impossible to prove an accusation false, and I believe that many actual rapes are not prosecuted. Finding an accurate figure on what is true and what is not is next to impossible when so few cases are actually prosecuted.

I have not seen the study the poster is quoting. But anyone who would look at the studies I have seen, which use the figure 2%, and conclude that 98% of rape allegations are true is a complete idiot. It bothers me because as a statistician people misuse statistics all the time, which causes people to mistrust statistics. Statistics don't lie, although they can certainly be used to mislead. Inferences lie. Let's say we have a zip code of 10 million dollar homes. Let's say it is a small zip code. Let's say there is one home in the zip code that is an estate worth around 100 million. If that home sells in a given year, and no other homes in the zip code sell, the median home price for homes sold in the zip code would be 100 million. That is not a lie. If someone were to make that statement "the median home price in the zip code is 100 million so that is what a typical home goes for" then the lie would be the second part of the statement, the part about that being a typical home in the zip. The part of the statement about the median home price would be true. The statistic is not a lie, it is merely a calculation. The lie is an incorrect inference, resulting from an incorrect interpretation, of the statistic.

I would also add that when people hear stats which confirm their preconceived notions, or in other cases what they WANT to believe, they don't tend to question them. A number of years ago a sociologist at (I believe) Harvard studied domestic violence. In her study, 70% of nonreciprocal domestic violence was committed by women. She was attacked by certain women's groups (not ALL women's groups, I don't mean to imply that) who said she needed to take down her study because it did not help women. To her credit, she did not do so. When questioned, she stated that she was a social scientist, and that she was going to examine an issue whether or not people liked the results. But the point is that many people questioned her because her findings were not consistent with what they believed, or what they WANTED to believe. My guess is that if she had found that 80% of the non-reciprocal domestic violence in her study was committed by men lots of the people who doubted her would not have given that figure a second thought. They would not have questioned the methodology, they simply would have accepted it because it was in line with their preconceived notions.

And goldengate, how the fuck was Kavanaugh PROVEN innocent? He was not prosecuted, but that does not prove he did not do what he was accused of doing. I don't know whether he did or not, I was not there, but he was not 'proven innocent.' I would say that I was surprised anyone could be that stupid, but I have seen plenty of your other posts so I can't say I'm surprised.

[reckless toboggan]

To the OP.

I'm glad the little shit harasser got caught. No one should have to deal harassment, especially someone so young. Sounds like you have a brave kid that has good self esteem and will do well in life because of good parenting.

This is a difficult subject that is finally getting the attention it deserves.

Here is another good (long-ish) read about it that it seems not many people consider, or perhaps just don't know about.

https://slate.com/human-interest/201...-as-women.html

[iceman]

@LDD: I get what you're saying, but wow. also somewhat curious why it pushes that much of a button.

[Supermoon]

^^ that’s a whole lot of words with no study links. Here’s one: 995 out of every 1000 rapists walk free.
https://www.rainn.org/statistics/cri...justice-system

The number of “unfounded” reports is hard to pin down, but no matter how you look at it it’s really low: https://www.nsvrc.org/sites/default/...-Reporting.pdf

Lots of studies include victims who decide not to cooperate later on, have inconsistencies in their story, or wait too long in those statistics.

[TahoeJ]

Jesus. When my oldest daughter goes off to school I’m going to make sure she knows to contact me and not some school staff if shit goes down. And I’m not internet tough guy kidding at all. It will be like the climatic scene in The Unforgiven. At some point these frat douches are gonna have to learn about real consequences... I’ve been an 18-22 year old guy and could control myself just fine.

[hercule33]

Jesus. When my oldest daughter goes off to school I’m going to make sure she knows to contact me and not some school staff if shit goes down. And I’m not internet tough guy kidding at all. It will be like the climatic scene in The Unforgiven. At some point these frat douches are gonna have to learn about real consequences... I’ve been an 18-22 year old guy and could control myself just fine.

Studies have shown its not as much controlling yourself as it is about your definition of consent. Many guys in college don’t consider having sex with a girl who is passed out rape. Their friends don’t consider it rape either. Sexual consent is not something that is widely discussed so everyone forms their own definition.

Then there’s victim blaming to add to the problem. Why was she dressed so sexy? Why was she drinking with a bunch of guys? Why was she walking alone at night? Your efforts to combat these issues will be more effective than going “Unforgiven” on some frat college guy.

Lastly, don’t wait until college. According to studies around 75% of sexual assaults victims know their perpetrator and those perps are often family members and friends. Start having talks with your daughters now, even if they are if someone touches you there, that’s not OK and let me know.

[liv2ski]

TJ, from personal experience, high school is when the shit happens. By college, the girls have already been taught a harsh lesson in most cases and are more careful. Talk to them while they are young and keep an eye on them. They will not appreciate it at the time, but will down the road.

[mtngirl79]

Talk to your sons.

Then consider your attitudes. The words you use. The jokes you tell. The movies you watch. The things you laugh at. The way you treat the women in your life and those you encounter.

Your examples will shape your sons attitudes far more than anything else. Kids are always watching and they see far more than you realize.

[The AD]

Many guys in college don’t consider having sex with a girl who is passed out rape.

Come on, now. I don't believe that shit for a second. They all know it's rape. Some may not want to admit it.

[hercule33]

Talk to your sons.

Then consider your attitudes. The words you use. The jokes you tell. The movies you watch. The things you laugh at. The way you treat the women in your life and those you encounter.

Your examples will shape your sons attitudes far more than anything else. Kids are always watching and they see far more than you realize.

^^^This. Let's face it, the vast majority of sexual assaults are perpetuated by men. It is far better to stop the problem at it's source rather than to make women find workarounds (don't get drunk around guys, don't dress sexy, don't walk home alone at night). And far too few men are talking to other men (not women) about sexual assault and respecting women.

Before people get all worked up, I am not encouraging that girls should get drunk at parties, but suggesting that if a girl does get drunk at a party she has not somehow waived her right not to get raped. You don't have to be perfect to be a victim.

Also, I think that it is fine to question the decision of women but there problem lies that only women's decisions are questioned. No one asks, why do so many men rape women? Why do so many men rape other men (Sandusky cough, cough)? Why do so many men rape children (Catholic church scandals)? Often times when you ask those questions you are portrayed as being anti-male when you are simply asking valid questions based on years of scientific data.

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