bullshit jobs

[neufox47]

9-10 years ago I was lead attorney for the seller company/shareholders (2 classes of common + preferred shares) of a closely held corporation. Buyer was a large publicly traded corporation. Our team was comprised of 4 attorneys (me, patent attorney, FCC license attorney, foreign attorney). Buyer's team was 30+ attorneys. Yeah yeah, it was a complex transaction and a buyer often needs a couple more attorneys to do due diligence, but not 26 more. We wondered what the fuck 20 of the junior attorneys did (other than bill). I never learned what they charged. I image it was >10X what my team's fee.

My small business clients won't put up with that shit.

Heh, the money I’ve seen wasted on attorneys in my career. My favorite though was an attorney that convinced this market of insurers (large risks are rarely insured by 1 company, no one wants to be on the hook for a Billion) to do some deep dive into case law to see if they could deny a claim that was clearly owed after Sandy. He was so optimistic that they could deny this claim. The attorney came back 45 days later with a, Nope you owe it, and a bill for $1,000,000.

[reckless toboggan]

[idahospud]

My previous employer had someone on staff who was the "Director of Quality." She looked like Stewie from Family Guy and would often schedule "debriefs" after a meeting to drill down deeper on what was discussed in the meeting. That's right, a meeting to review what was discussed in the meeting we just had.

My job definitely isn't in the "bullshit" category, but there are plenty of people who would like to see it go the way of the dodo despite that fact.

We've got one of those, too, but without the debriefs or Stewie resemblance. Makes me think of Office Space and the Bobs' conference room: "Planning to Plan."

I've read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance a few times and still don't understand what the fuck quality is.

[old goat]

I'm pretty sure that's cow shit, not bullshit.

[Dantheman]

Heh, the money I’ve seen wasted on attorneys in my career. My favorite though was an attorney that convinced this market of insurers (large risks are rarely insured by 1 company, no one wants to be on the hook for a Billion) to do some deep dive into case law to see if they could deny a claim that was clearly owed after Sandy. He was so optimistic that they could deny this claim. The attorney came back 45 days later with a, Nope you owe it, and a bill for $1,000,000.

EPA gives a company the good news that they are a CERCLA PRP. Company spends more money on attorneys and consultants fighting EPA in court than it would have cost to just clean the place up.

[Mazderati]

EPA gives a company the good news that they are a CERCLA PRP. Company spends more money on attorneys and consultants fighting EPA in court than it would have cost to just clean the place up.

But then the company would have to acknowledge they did something wrong.

[Thurgood Jenkins]

ski area Security Guards: started that at JHMR a few years ago. Thug life at the slopes; Big dudes dressed all in black.

Clown job - which I point out to them regularly.

Thank you for stating this.

[wooley12]

Guy at the sewer dept. where I worked as dumbass college summer help set me straight. "Maybe it is shit to you, to me it's bread and butter." I;ll never forget that well deserved kick in the ass. So, there is no such thing as a bullshit job. Maybe times have changed.

[GeezerSteve]

Company spends more money on attorneys and consultants fighting EPA in court than it would have cost to just clean the place up.

What we have here is a failure to conduct a meaningful cost/benefit analysis.

[glademaster]

Guy at the sewer dept. where I worked as dumbass college summer help set me straight. "Maybe it is shit to you, to me it's bread and butter." I;ll never forget that well deserved kick in the ass. So, there is no such thing as a bullshit job. Maybe times have changed.

That guy had a shitty job, not a bullshit job. You couldn't pay me enough to trade places with one of our WWTP guys, but they provide an essential service. You could say they're smelling salt of the earth.

Curating social media content might be cushy as fuck, but is certainly bullshit.

[NW_SKIER]

let’s let nwskier verify

...can you identify that shit, please.

That's cow shit

[wooley12]

You get used to the smell of shit in about a week. Another life lesson learned.

[Dantheman]

What we have here is a failure to conduct a meaningful cost/benefit analysis.

Nah, Maz nailed it. It's not about the money for them, they do it on principle.

[old goat]

That guy had a shitty job, not a bullshit job. You couldn't pay me enough to trade places with one of our WWTP guys, but they provide an essential service. You could say they're smelling salt of the earth.

Curating social media content might be cushy as fuck, but is certainly bullshit.

I was dropping off some stuff at the dump, the place reeked, of course. Took a glance at the people in the back of the building sorting garbage into stuff that goes to the landfill and stuff that gets recycled and then dumped into the landfill. Garbage collection is a shitty but essential job. Sorting the garbage not so much.

[Benny Profane]

That's cow shit

Let's call in the lawyers for a final determination.

[Flyoverland Captive]

Every job sucks; that’s why they pay you to do it.

[stfu&gbtw]

Fastest read ever. Try building a network without reading the hardware manufacturer's "best practices" documentation. Apparently "writing for the New Yorker" has become a bullshit job, which really bums me out.

[Name Redacted]

I was dropping off some stuff at the dump, the place reeked, of course. Took a glance at the people in the back of the building sorting garbage into stuff that goes to the landfill and stuff that gets recycled and then dumped into the landfill. Garbage collection is a shitty but essential job. Sorting the garbage not so much.

I know a guy who does this for a living. Once of the nicest, happiest guys I know. Gets most of his clothes from the trash too. Old hippy, and smokes copiously, but seriously a good dude.

[GiBo]

You get used to the smell of shit in about a week. Another life lesson learned.

I can attest to this. I've been working at a poop plant for 15 years. The smell isn't as bad as you'd think. In fact, the percentage of human waste in the influent is not very high. Think about washing machines, washing dishes, showers, industrial users. It's mostly dirty water. Once the influent is past the primary and definitely once it's past secondary treatment, the solids are long gone and it's just funky water.

[wooley12]

In 1968, poop was only treated once and then settled out. Sewage came into the plant via an open cement lined ditch. My job 1st thing in the morning was to scrape TP and whatever off of the grate that kept and big stuff out of the plant. You don't think that they were pranking the dumb ass college boy?

[GiBo]

Probably not pranking you. They still have to clean the grates in the Headworks, but now it's done with a mechanical rake which places the solids on a conveyor belt and then into a dumpster (We get some interesting stuff in that dumpster). And it's all underground and contained. There's even an air exhaust scrubber that deals with the oder. But it's still low man on the totem pole that gets any Headworks duties. I've been in there. It ain't pretty.

[mcski]

You get used to the smell of shit in about a week. Another life lesson learned.

With cat lady piss houses, your nose just stops accepting that smell after a while. It's just too brutal a smell so the nose/brain tries to block it out completely.