How to spot a flatlander?

[Peruvian]

Okay mountain town folks, let's have a little fun. Everyone sees the the Bogner ladies in the small town grocery looking for the fresh squeezed juice bar, organic figs, and the fresh seafood counter. Driving an Earth Crusher SUV with bald tires or using the Texas Suitcase are obvious as well. However, there are other tell-tale signs that might be less obvious like the fact that they hold open the door while finishing their goodbyes on a minus 5 degree night allowing all the heat from the wood stove out of the house.

How do you spot a flatlander in your town?

[Vt-Freeheel]

I look in the mirror😙

[Timberridge]

They put on their boots in the parking lot.

[From_the_NEK]

By the look in the eyes.

[CascadeLuke]

2wd sedans on a fresh day

[Jong Lafitte]

Driving a U-Haul to your town.

[HankScorpio]

Skiing bell to bell in shit conditions to justify the $120 you paid for a ticket at the window.


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[Meadow Skipper]

Just to start:
Cowboy hats and ostentatious western garb in the supermarket.

Driving slowly and swerving side to side in town while they try to figure out where to go.

Asking why there isn't better cell service on the mountain.

"You live near here?"

Fainting in the lift ticket line.

Loud boisterous table in the restaurant.

Carrying shopping bags from the expensive boutiques.

"Where's the Plaza?"

"Which way down?" on the green Easy Street run.

Sparkling clean vehicles...in the ditch.

"Ah don't speak Mexican."

In a pile at the bottom of the lift off-load ramp.

Taking group pictures in front of the ski area signs.

Insulated ski pants, cotton hoody sweatshirts, camo anything.

Large-ish groups walking and gawking in the historic section of town.

[XXX-er]

They put on their boots in the parking lot.

Pro tip that impresses everyone is to pull out a foot stool to sit on while you put yer boots on

Sit on it to drink beer and take the boot off

[smartyiak]

Wearing an Eagles jersey in Magic's liftline next weekend!

[Smoova]

Pro tip that impresses everyone is to pull out a foot stool to sit on while you put yer boots on

Sit on it to drink beer and take the boot off

5-gallon paint bucket.

[justinspau]

All new patagonia and fresh DPS skis with AT binders with polished boots, backpack full of random shit, gopro.... wait sorry I am thinking of Niesko japan.

Flat landers walking to the lodge without any ski gear.


Sent from my van down by the river. Using a NewSchoolers hack... sick I know.

[Evil E]

Youre carrying their bags

[Elkhound Odin]

Don’t we already have thread for this. Gaper something or other

[Angle Parking]

Driving 120 km on the straight sections, slowing to 30 on the turns.

$70 000 Platinum package truck with Alberta plates.

Obesity

Shiny, brand new everything accompanied by limited skiing ability/skiing endurance. The ones that can ski are sure to take 3 or 4 breaks on the way down.

Bitter, angry people who talk about the state if the economy and other sh@t like that.


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[Angle Parking]

5-gallon paint bucket.

Or you can just put then on at home and drive with them on. Not that hard if you drive an automatic.



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[concretejungle]

Driving slowly and swerving side to side in town while they try to figure out where to go.

You live in NM so everyone drives like that.

[hairy asshole]

Drive to the top of Loveland pass and look out over the parking lot called I-70.

One of my houses is in the flatlands. Do I count?

[Meadow Skipper]

You live in NM so everyone drives like that.

Yeah, but for the locals it’s because they’re drunk, not just lost.

[Vt-Freeheel]

More than 1 house.

[Meadow Skipper]

^Right? Around here, the bigger the house, the more likely it’s a part-timer/vacation place.

[The AD]

Assume driving time can be calculated purely on miles. "A 60 mile drive? That will take an hour."

[old goat]

Posting on TGR about how local you are.
Skiing. Real locals can't afford to ski.

[flatlander#2]

wut

[uglymoney]

I have trouble walking down stairs by Thursday on ski weeks out west. Easy to spot because I'll be talking myself down usually with beer in hand. Always ask people if they live around here. Love being a tourist and don't care. Not as true now as it used to be but for all my flatland gaping's and sweatshirt wearing tendencies I can usually hang with the shit kicking locals on the hill...definitely a few steps behind the better locals half my age but I am okay with that.