Grieving a dying parent....

[gravitylover]

Sorry JGB Give me a call if you want to talk.

[SB]

Peace brutha


Your mom's body may have died but she did not.


Strength to you in the coming days.

[Mazderati]

RIP

[TBS]

Mom died last night. 8-22-47 - 6/23/17.

Love you Mom. Rest in Peace.

Sad for you mang, tough time.

You live anywhere near the solar eclipse path? It's close enough to your mom's b-day maybe there's a way to celebrate her life around that event. I see a lot of metaphors

Hang in there. Virtual (bro)hug to you

[Gepeto]

You are and will be one of your mother's most important legacies.

Grow stronger with each moment you share your loss with those that come to comfort you.

Godspeed

[My Pet Powder Goat]

Sorry, C. My deepest condolences, brother.

[Danno]

peace, jgb.

[Vt-Freeheel]

So sorry for your loss. Stay strong through the coming days.

[RShea]

So sorry for the news of your loss.

[splat]

I am so sorry, C.
Live those emotions and mourn her loss to come to peace with it.

[reckless toboggan]

Mom died last night. 8-22-47 - 6/23/17.

Love you Mom. Rest in Peace.

So sorry for your loss jgb.

Carry all the good memories with you. Tell your family and friends about the good, the bad, the lessons learned. The shape she had on your life.

Take time to take care of yourself too.

[stuckathuntermtn]

Sorry man. Hang in there. Take some time to yourself if you need, but don't isolate yourself. Seems to work for me.

[iceman]

I'm a pretty rational nuts-and-bolts sciencey kinda guy, not some new-age mystic kinda person. But I've become convinced that we have no idea what is actually going in in the universe, that there are layers and depths we can't even conceive of. Which is to say, maybe you'll encounter her again, in some fashion. Who knows? I wouldn't say it's over.

But in the meantime, she's as alive in your mind as she ever was, it's like you went to the store and she's sitting at home waiting for you to come back with half-and-half for her coffee. My mom's been dead for 10 years and she's as clear in my head as ever. She's alive in there at least.

Hang in there my man. Time makes it easier, as people have said. But it's not about forgetting either.

[jgb@etree]

Merry Christmas, Mom. Words can't express how much I miss you. My 40th Xmas is my first without you. I can't imagine it'll ever be the same.

[Danno]

Peace.

[splat]

Jeezuz. Be the first Christmas since my mom died, too. Lost her feb 2nd. Hang in there, bruthaman.
You and me still got some serious skiing and partying to attend to.

[LeeLau]

jgb - my mum has been slowly slipping away the past two years. It's good to know you're not alone and know that none of us are alone in this.

My wife lost both her parents and is helping me deal with this. I hope you have lots of people who're helping you too. My wife shared this poem with me and other friends in the same situation. It's given me comfort and hope it helps you too


Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.

[hutash]

I can relate, Lee. Christmas has always revolved around mom's house. This is the first year without any of her usually displays. She barely remembers what Christmas is, and this may seriously be her last. I have no words of advice, and could use some if you find any.

"Motherless children have a harder time when the mother is dead Lord. "

Here is to all mother's living and dead...CHEERS

[SB]

Circle of life

[mcski]

We get ourselves special Christmas presents "from" the recently departed. My wife got herself and her siblings presents from her mom this year. Takes the sting out a little and extends a nice memory.

[jono]

Just crossed the fourth anniversary since we lost my FIL to lymphoma from Agent Orange. First few Christmases were rough--he was really close to his kids. This year my SIL went through his photo/tape/movie archives, converted stuff to digital and sent out copies of things he made in Vietnam 50 years ago. Mrsjono hadn't been able to handle hearing his voice but the really old recordings are easier and seen like they're helping turn a page so she can remember him fondly with a little less grief. Never know how long or what path grieving will take but at least it gets easier as it goes.

[garyfromterrace]

jgb. Condolences man. Lost my mom about 7 years ago, it ain't easy. Time and the knowledge that she had a life well lived makes it easier, eventually.

[yeahman]

Was just sitting at the computer today and on a whim clicked on my mom's obit and another newspaper article about her that I had saved in favorites from when she passed in 2015. Thirty-five years as a nurse including multiple stints in Central America as a volunteer on a medical team. Felt a little moistness in the eyes. Merry Christmas mom.

[SLCMunchie]

Little late to the thread here, but i had my father and step-mother unexpectedly ripped away from me and my family in July this year. December has been particularly hard with my father's birthday last week, Christmas this week, and my step mothers birthday coming up in about 5 weeks. oh, and no snow here, tons of work, and the pending birth of my second child in about a month. I hope everyone who lost someone and has posted in this thread is doing ok. my family and i did ok i think getting through christmas without really talking about it. i've been running the family business and taking care of two estates for the last 4 months so i really haven't had time to grieve and deal with the reality of what happened. i've gotten into a bad routine of drinking at night. i'm hoping riding the indoor bike trainer and getting some sense of normalcy back will help curb the temptation to numb. I read everywhere that time heals, and i get it, but fuck time goes slow when you are in the trenches.

i hope everyone has found some peace and healing through this holiday season. i've been able to find bits and pieces of peace and love that keeps me going. much love to everyone who was hurting this christmas due to the loss of a loved one!

[Conundrum]

It's tough man. You're going to go through a year of firsts now. First birthday party without her, first Thanksgiving, first Christmas...it's all tough. It's a tough God damn thing all around. And what's weird is if we're lucky because we didn't die early, we'll all lose our parents someday but just because everyone is doing it, it doesn't make it easy. My dad died from a massive heart attack at work at 67. From what I hear from the fellows there, he was dead before he hit the ground. In some ways it's easier, in some ways there's regrets. I have no good advice.

Keep your head up when you need to. Put it down when you can. There's no shame. The pain passes and the memories remain.