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Thread: 2017 Darwin Awards
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04-05-2017, 11:50 AM #1Funky But Chic
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2017 Darwin Awards
There doesn't appear to be a 2017 thread as far as I can tell, so here goes:
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/nati...icle-1.3020327
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04-05-2017, 11:51 AM #2Contest prizes included a free doughnut and a button boasting the win, the news station reported.
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04-05-2017, 11:54 AM #3
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04-05-2017, 11:59 AM #4
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04-05-2017, 12:00 PM #5
i won a pie eating contest not long ago. i'm surprised more people don't choke.
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04-05-2017, 12:01 PM #6
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04-05-2017, 12:06 PM #7
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04-05-2017, 12:13 PM #8
Post 6 and this thread has real potential to go in a completely sideways direction.
I may regret this, but ok.
Let's hear more about this pie eating contest Spook.I still call it The Jake.
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04-05-2017, 12:18 PM #9
it was. giant ones. and since i am an expert binger and purger i had time to choke myself with some cocks before i ate them. i couldn't stand up to accept the award because i had a boner. well, and i was too busy eating the cocks of the vanquished, which is quite erotic and satisfying.
i was fine for about 30 minutes and then all the cock meat and sugar started to overwhelm my systems. i head for the nearest bucks (this was at an outdoor festival in eugene). they had just finished sucking all the shit out and wiping everything down. i opened the door to the most pristine portable shitter i have ever seen. lifted the lid to puke my cocks out and i saw the calm pool of deep blue. awesome! until the first substantial cock chunk hit the water and my entire face was splashed with blue shitwater mixed with cock chunks. i could only laugh at the latest in a lifetime of hilarious self-inflicted stupidity. it actually made it easier to puke because rather than just trying to empty my guts i was legitimately horrified and revulsed in addition to being humored.
true story. it was chocolate cock pie. i doubt i would have been so ravenous for vanilla.
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04-05-2017, 12:38 PM #10
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04-05-2017, 12:48 PM #11
that was for viva
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04-05-2017, 12:50 PM #12
by the way, the blue shitwater burns your face like acid.
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04-05-2017, 01:02 PM #13
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04-05-2017, 01:08 PM #14
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04-05-2017, 01:12 PM #15
the cocks were cooked into the pie. they may have arrived at the kitchen in a bag. i should have asked.
i won because the cardinal rule of eating cocks, even on stage in front of a couple thousand people, is never stop eating. never look up to see how your fellow cock eaters are doing it, unless it's an orgy and it gets you off. but not in a cock pie eating contest.
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04-05-2017, 01:14 PM #16
that and i am a voracious and noisy cock pie eater. i think the unabashed guttural moaning and growling intimidated the more repressed competitors.
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04-05-2017, 01:15 PM #17Funky But Chic
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I knew I should've just added the story in the op to the 2016 Darwin thread.
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04-05-2017, 01:47 PM #18
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.the...g-contest/amp/
Tags: #sororitygirl #choking
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04-05-2017, 03:15 PM #19
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04-05-2017, 03:21 PM #20Funky But Chic
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04-05-2017, 03:31 PM #21
Iceman will now be forever linked in the search function annals of history as the guy who started the cock pie eating contest thread.
I'm sorry man.I still call it The Jake.
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04-05-2017, 03:33 PM #22
i've been waiting
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04-05-2017, 03:34 PM #23
i have more. your thread could be next. you could say i cocked up this thread.
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04-05-2017, 03:43 PM #24
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04-05-2017, 03:47 PM #25Funky But Chic
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