I am drinking too much

[MTT]

FYI, I will make it through tonight without a drink.
I will start working early Sunday morning.
Goal no booze Sunday Night.

"I think it's going to be a battle but doable"

I am glancing over at my weights untouched on the floor. Maybe tomorrow?

[MakersTeleMark]

MTT:

From a guy that knows how to drink.

Buy a new set of clothes. Seriously, a new wardrobe.

Step into some other shoes. Shoes. Literally.

I am not telling you what others are about "admitting" or "moving through it".

Seriously. By a shirt, buy new underwear, buy new pants, and a real sweater, not a fucking fleece, a damn sweater.

Have a fucking beer, and wear those new clothes.

Do it.

Or just try it. What's the worst that could happen.

Caveat: if you need advice from a female about said purchases, take it.

Trust me. And post up the cool shoes.

[MTT]

There will be no new women in my life for the foreseeable future.

I might have some "Trust Issues"

[mtngirl79]

I dont have any advice, except my life is kind of awesome right now, so yours can be, too.

[MakersTeleMark]

I dont have any advice, except my life is kind of awesome right now, so yours can be, too.

That right there says a lot.

Post up shoes, bitches!

[MTT]

I dont have any advice, except my life is kind of awesome right now, so yours can be, too.

Thanks.
I have to remind myself that by many peoples standards My life is awesome.
Maybe I should have put this in the first world Problems Thread?

[mtngirl79]

Thanks.
I have to remind myself that by many peoples standards My life is awesome.
Maybe I should have put this in the first world Problems Thread?

No. Some people have problems that look bigger than yours on paper, but that doesn't make yours any less, or your feelings invalid in any way.

[DeepHelmet]

MTT I think I may be like you. Went through a pretty long patch where I was fairly wasted every night. Not physically addicted, but mentally addicted. Every once and a while work would intervene and I'd have to go for a few days to a week without drinking. No DT's, but I did enjoy not waking up feeling like shit. What helped me was thinking about myself in the long term. I've had several family members who have died too soon from too much drinking. I don't want to be like them. I still knock em back, but really only on the weekends now. I think the big thing is figuring out if you're the kind of person who needs to stop drinking forever, or just tone it down a bit. It's a hard line to walk. Good luck dude.

[Name Redacted]

I wouldn't wish addiction upon anyone, but at least you know your enemy. Kick it in the ass. Everything else you need to hear has been said. Good luck brother.

[MTT]

MTT I think I may be like you. Went through a pretty long patch where I was fairly wasted every night. Not physically addicted, but mentally addicted. Every once and a while work would intervene and I'd have to go for a few days to a week without drinking. No DT's, but I did enjoy not waking up feeling like shit. What helped me was thinking about myself in the long term. I've had several family members who have died too soon from too much drinking. I don't want to be like them. I still knock em back, but really only on the weekends now. I think the big thing is figuring out if you're the kind of person who needs to stop drinking forever, or just tone it down a bit. It's a hard line to walk. Good luck dude.

Thanks.
Not sure where I am on the Never ever, versus back off.
I know I don't feel good. I know I am letting things slide.

I also know that it's nice to mentally check out now and then.
I am getting at that age where burning the candle at both ends is hard to recover from.
I have been heading on a trajectory where in end up a person I don't want to be.

Kinda enjoying tonight. alert in bed, and still exchanging E-Mail with work while enjoying the interwebz.

I did not do everything I should have done today. But I did enough.

Honestly this thread kept me from heading down to the store to "Reload" this afternoon.

I obviously have developed a bad habit and am now consciously trying to break it.

You never know where that line is. The breaking point?
Figure I am pretty close.

[iceman]

Well even if you step over the line it doesn't mean it has to be forever. I know a guy who was way too hardcore and dialed it back just in time.

[My Pet Powder Goat]

In jeans?

[MTT]

MTT needs to

[btmacken]

So what's the plan for Sunday MTT? I know we are all routing for you! The whole one day at a time thing.... well, it actually works. Look at it as one moment at a time really. Have a plan and write it down. Hell, write it down here, there is enough of us here to try and hold you true to something if you want.

The other thing I like with not drinking is giving yourself little rewards. For what you would spend on a fifth, save it for something you have been wanting (new skis, a bike, vacation). You'd be surprised how quickly you have the money that literally would have been pissed away. Make some sort of goal and we will help you get there!

[Bobby Stainless]

Switch to pot.

[Vt-Freeheel]

MTT needs to

That's the spirit.

You can make it through today, no problem. Everyone is here for support.

[liv2ski]

If he is like me, pot just puts me to sleep. A 5th a day is pretty fair gone. Try and reel yourself in a ways, like no drinking on weekdays and then on Saturday treat yourself and a friend to a nice meal with the money saved. Alcohol can be a harsh Mistress, be sure you're in control of the relationship, not the other way around and good luck.

[riser4]

Have you noticed how common this is becoming. I hear it everywhere.
Project Plans that require the talent to work night and day, Always under the gun always behind. always attending call where PMO is telling you it has to be done, NOW By morning By Monday. Just constant pressure. And it show in the mediocre work. Thrown together un tested. ect ect. And that turn generates even more emergency conference calls. Where as you try to debug logs and look at code, they are hammering away in your ear ask questions. - I have gotten a bit snippety a few times.

Not just in Dev. All aspects of the biz. What I often see is other teams that are part of the pipeline holding on to things until it is almost due and then flipping it over to be implemented without enough time to do do properly. And don't get me started on "devops".

[CarlMega]

Just know that it is very possible that the drinking and the job and the whatever might not be the problem. The problem is almost certainly between your ears and connected to that empty feeling near the top of your sternum. It took me a long time to figure that out.

^ QFT. You can always find the wrong in something external that is making you drink. The truth is usually more unpleasant to deal with, at first anyway.

Traps that you probably won't heed but may in time:

1) I better taper down vs. stopping because I may have DTs/seizure. I'm drinking 'just enough' to prevent issues while I moderate.
2) I'll just drink moderately or socially. I can control it and if I start to get out of hand, I'll stop entirely...again.

The most dangerous thing is that's there's some truth in both..but the addict brain will use these loop-holes to keep getting fed. Finding justification where it can to keep at it - using the ego of 'control it on my terms or I'm weak'...BS. As I wrote, alcohol additiction is sneaky - looking for that excuse... a party where everyone else is drinking. holidays. "health". ego.

A bottle of whiskey a day? Drinking in the morning? Drinking alone to fix feeling bad? I'm sorry to break this news to you but you are dependent. And phyiscally dependent at some level. And, listen up, you've already gleamed the most important lesson - it's no fucking fun anymore. Those days are over bro. Dependency drinking is not fun. Being an addict is not fun. It sucks. You know that.

Here's the real deal too...Let's say all this is too much heavy shit. It's judgy. Premature. Well - ok... Prove me wrong. Stop for a week. See how you feel? What is so good about the drink? you already feel like shit and losing health and self-respect - is it worth it for the prospect of having a few drinks where you'll maybe feel ok for 1hr and then self-loath for the next day? Fuck it man, there's nothing there in alcohol land for you... Really, you'll be missing absolutely nothing. In fairness tho - I wouldn't have listened to anyone either.

If you are on the path to addiction, the risk vs. reward of trying to merely moderate your drinking is amazing bad math.

[KQ]

^ QFT. You can always find the wrong in something external that is making you drink. The truth is usually more unpleasant to deal with, at first anyway.

Traps that you probably won't heed but may in time:

1) I better taper down vs. stopping because I may have DTs/seizure. I'm drinking 'just enough' to prevent issues while I moderate.
2) I'll just drink moderately or socially. I can control it and if I start to get out of hand, I'll stop entirely...again.

The most dangerous thing is that's there's some truth in both..but the addict brain will use these loop-holes to keep getting fed. Finding justification where it can to keep at it - using the ego of 'control it on my terms or I'm weak'...BS. As I wrote, alcohol additiction is sneaky - looking for that excuse... a party where everyone else is drinking. holidays. "health". ego.

A bottle of whiskey a day? Drinking in the morning? Drinking alone to fix feeling bad? I'm sorry to break this news to you but you are dependent. And phyiscally dependent at some level. And, listen up, you've already gleamed the most important lesson - it's no fucking fun anymore. Those days are over bro. Dependency drinking is not fun. Being an addict is not fun. It sucks. You know that.

Here's the real deal too...Let's say all this is too much heavy shit. It's judgy. Well - ok... Prove me wrong. Stop for a week. See how you feel? What is so good about the drink? you already feel like shit and losing health and self-respect - is it worth it for the prospect of having a few drinks where you'll maybe feel ok for 1hr and then self-loath for the next day? Fuck it man, there's nothing there in alcohol land for you... Really, you'll be missing absolutely nothing. In fairness tho - I wouldn't have listened to anyone either.

So very, very true and yes very very hard to hear/read/face. Honestly you could replace "drinking" or "alcohol" with so many other things like "compulsive spending" "eating" "smoking" "gambling".

Had a good friend who drank because of his narcissistic father. Tried to dull the pain of conditional love that he spent his life trying to live up to. Guy is an eye surgeon and would have to take Valium to keep his hands steady during surgery. His clinic partners finally kicked him out of the practice which was a huge wake-up call for him. He quit for a while and realized how good it felt to be sober but made the mistake of moving close to his parents and because his father was the underlying problem that didn't go away he hit the bottle again. I lost touch with him so I have no idea how he's doing now. Hope he figured it out but not sure he had the strength because he dad taught him a real man doesn't need help and refused to recognize his son's problem even when I told him and his wife point blank he needed help.

Once we were having a conversation about pot vs. alcohol and I dared to say I didn't think pot was worse than drinking and as a matter of fact I said I thought drinking was worse (having seen his son's problem first hand) and his Dad told me that he had a friend who drank himself to death but that he "was a man to the end and no hippie pot smoker"

[TahoeJ]

There was a "study" that came out a few months back that revealed physical dependency was mostly bullshit. Not completely, but mostly, for the majority of addicts. There's almost always something else that needs to be addressed. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann...b_6506936.html

And while not the driving motivator behind it all, so much of the ongoing pattern can often be a habitual enjoyment of the routine more than the alcohol itself. So in addition to the other good advice in this thread, consider a fall back replacement beverage during those times. Something you like. Coke, Arnold Palmers, Coffee, whatever.

[MTT]

Hard time going to sleep last night. but I did go to sleep.

Been working since 7AM

On a bridge right now, trying to figure out how to get a SIP switch to receive a TFN for TDD then dial back off the system to a pots number.

I will be working all day.

Of note. I feel fine. alert and awake, no issues.

[billyk]

My dad was a heavy drinker. But, not a drunk - he could handle the liquor and was quite functional, even when drinking a quart of vodka a day. He flew Corsairs off carriers in WWII, and said drinking was part of the life. After the war, a two martini lunch was an accepted part of business for that generation.

He was a nice, fun loving, smart man, with a lot of friends, and a good job. Too bad he died at 52.

[MTT]

Can't smoke the weed.

I work on Gubermit communication systems.

"Go figure" right?

[emr]

There was a study that came out a few months back that revealed physical dependency was mostly bullshit. Not completely, but mostly, for the majority of addicts. There's almost always something else that needs to be addressed. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann...b_6506936.html

And while not the driving motivator behind it all, so much of the ongoing pattern can often be a habitual enjoyment of the routine more than the alcohol itself. So in addition to the other good advice in this thread, consider a fall back replacement beverage during those times. Something you like. Coke, Arnold Palmers, Coffee, whatever.

So I followed your link, because I was intrigued. Not much in the article, but does it's job, gets you to his webpage and book. Here's were I loose you, as you say physical dependency is mostly bullshit. This isn't a study done by a medical professional, but an author writing a book. Hell, look at his webpage, it's not full of doctors or other medical research professional praising the book, it mostly list media outlets. Come on man, I have an open mind, but if the top praises come from people like Bill Maher, Elton John, and Russel Brand, and not the medical field, let's hold back from calling this "study" the final word.

Also, how'd that switching of product, say beer for coke, work out for John Daly?