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  1. #151
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
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    The Land of Subdued Excitement
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    These women get on the bus all day long with these huge strollers, tons of crap, screaming kid, all stressed out...

    Then there is (was, I haven't seen her in a while) this other woman that would get on with her baby happily sleeping in a front carrier. She'd have a reasonable size diaper bag, maybe a bag of groceries and the baby in the carrier. Peaceful, relaxed and quiet.

    Then one day I looked close. She didn't have a baby, she had a doll...

  2. #152
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    Jan 2008
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    tree OH TREE!!!!!
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    3,150
    "Your gona fuck something up, get over it"

    Dad

  3. #153
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    Oct 2004
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    so cal
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    Quote Originally Posted by wyeaster View Post
    i never thought i'd have kids or be married and i never considered myself as carrying an ounce of paternal instinct. but other than the typical difficulties related to basic things like sleep and establishing a routine i have loved every minute with my 4 year old son. i'm glad he's getting older because we can do more things, but i'm also sad because i'm 50 and i'll be 65 when he gets out of high school and goes off to new adventures. it's such a small window that's going by so fast i just hope i can stay alive and fully functional for as long as possible.
    Thank you for knowing I am not the only one going through this and I share the same sentiments.

  4. #154
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    Nov 2005
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    Nordvand
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    1,620
    #2 arrives by scheduled C Section tomorrow morning. Wine fridge is full.
    i wish i never chose that user_name

    Whitedot Freeride

  5. #155
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
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    AK
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    928
    You've got tons on here, and it's a ways out, but I'll echo the "eat real food" part as they get there. It's fun taking all your kids out to (casual) Thai, Japanese, or Vietnamese restaurants and eating all the wierd shit, kids too. The staff always love it too... Downside: having to tell kids they "ran out of tuna" and only have avocado rolls left so you don't go broke...

    Plus then you can judge the other people's kids who are eating chicken fingers, because that's what it's all about... On that front, btw, don't sweat it. People will look at you like you're doing it wrong when they cry in the grocery store, sigh and eye roll when you march your 4 kids onto the plane or restaurant, etc.

    Within reason, there really isn't a "doing it wrong". Unless you raise Patriots fans.

  6. #156
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
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    The Cone of Uncertainty
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    47,010
    Quote Originally Posted by mtngirl79 View Post
    These women get on the bus all day long with these huge strollers, tons of crap, screaming kid, all stressed out...

    Then there is (was, I haven't seen her in a while) this other woman that would get on with her baby happily sleeping in a front carrier. She'd have a reasonable size diaper bag, maybe a bag of groceries and the baby in the carrier. Peaceful, relaxed and quiet.

    Then one day I looked close. She didn't have a baby, she had a doll...
    Ha! Nice. Also kind of creepy.

  7. #157
    doughboyshredder Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by hev View Post
    We have a boy due in April. The book baby wise has been a good reference for us as our a number of friends that are new parents. Some stuff we are learning/thinking about.

    1. The sleep attachment thing is personal preference. According to the baby wise book 1 hour of sleep for however many weeks old they are is a reasonable expectation even though it sounds aggressive. None of this is mutually exclusive with skin to skin contact and intimacy during the first month.
    2. Even if your breast feeding, do feedings at night via a bottle. That way you know exactly how much they ate. If they didn't eat enough and are waking up they are probably hungry and need to be fed, but if they got their fill it's probably not hunger. Take a pause before attending to their needs if they have enough food.
    Think about 2

    It's a fact that a breast fed only baby will not eat more than they need. Also there is really something to be said fir the magic of a boob in mouth calm down. Furthermore I would question anyone that suggests to pause before responding to a babies needs. That's contrary to all recent research.

  8. #158
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
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    The Cone of Uncertainty
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    This thread demonstrates how even twisted weirdo like Rontele can become boring once he has kids.

    And he hasn't even had one yet.

    T-minus 1.5 years until empty nest here. And stoked.

  9. #159
    doughboyshredder Guest
    Thought I had heard about that babywise bullshit somewhere.

    http://www.babysleepsite.com/sleep-t...for-your-baby/

    One of many criticisms of that garbage.

    Burn that fucking book and start researching about parenting methods that are focused on the children's wellbeing.

  10. #160
    doughboyshredder Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by iceman View Post
    This thread demonstrates how even twisted weirdo like Rontele can become boring once he has kids.

    And he hasn't even had one yet.

    T-minus 1.5 years until empty nest here. And stoked.
    Irl truth for me. Freak-to boring dad in mini van.

  11. #161
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Granite State
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    3,766
    Pull out.

  12. #162
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    Sep 2001
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    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post
    Irl truth for me. Freak-to boring dad in mini van.
    I mean you gotta own it, it's all good, but man does it cause some boring-ass discussions. Just do your best.

  13. #163
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    Dec 2009
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    Quote Originally Posted by commonlaw View Post
    Whoops!
    Quote Originally Posted by Meadow Skipper View Post
    Watching the episiotomy helps a lot with this.
    I was like what's she gonna do with those scissors. I let out an audible, oh shit.

    Quote Originally Posted by iceman View Post
    This thread demonstrates how even twisted weirdo like Rontele can become boring once he has kids.

    And he hasn't even had one yet.

    T-minus 1.5 years until empty nest here. And stoked.
    They'll be back.

    My ten year old tried to poach my line today. I got to bust his balls after he face planted. I did compliment him on keeping his weight forward and skiing aggressively.

  14. #164
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
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    I mean I have great kids. Couldn't be happier. But there are phases in life. This next one, they're on their own.

    The one after that they take care of us.

  15. #165
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    Dec 2009
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    in a box on the porch
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    Quote Originally Posted by iceman View Post
    I mean I have great kids. Couldn't be happier. But there are phases in life. This next one, they're on their own.

    The one after that they take care of us.
    Faze 2 don't call if you get locked up at 2am.

    Faze 3 don't push me down the steps, peekaboo.

  16. #166
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
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    truckee
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    Re where to position yourself during the delivery--do not do what this one guy at work did--brought in pics of the baby coming out.
    Do not do what this one dad did while I was sewing up an episiotomy--stood behind me, watched over my shoulder, and told me to make it tighter.
    Be sitting down if they show you the placenta--not like the guy at my hospital who passes out, they call a code white (fainting), team rushes in, door cracks the guy in the head, he suffers traumatic brain injury, sues, settles for 10K (not that smart to begin with).

    And now flash forward 18 years--the empty nest syndrome is highly overrated. Most kids make themselves unwelcome before they leave. Plus for the last year or two at home they're only home to sleep, if that, so the nest has been empty for a while before you realize it.

  17. #167
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    Dec 2009
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    I watched the c-section on the second one. I found it fascinating. I got a couple smirks, when asked if anyone had left anything in there.

  18. #168
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
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    16,592
    i was on the receiving end for viewing during delivery. it was all so surreal i wasn't bothered by anything. just standing there watching when my son plopped out. huh. his cry is burned into my brain. little bit later came the rest. blurp literally inches from my hands. i'd forgotten that was coming. i remember my mind going slow motion fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. i was in a daze, it didn't really bother me and i didn't really think about it. just made sure my wife was okay and then i had to go with my son to the other side of the room. i watched some of the stitching. not sure why, probably because i was going back and forth to make sure everybody was good. the aspect of repairing her for future "use" didn't cross my mind. in fact, i was pretty asexual for a long time not because of anything that had to do with the childbirthing but just because i was so overwhelmed by the experience of having another little being in my life.

    oh, here's some advice that some might not agree with. if you have highly emotional or shall we say, involved, parents and that is a big stress not everybody has to be around all the time. i don't know how it worked for anybody else but my folks intended to be there 24/7 but dealing with them during the wait when we were both so exhausted was too much. nothing happened in the evening so i sent my folks home and we'd see them in the morning. my wife went into labor at 4am and i decided not to call them and my son was out at 445 and honestly, as much as i love my folks i was glad it was just the three of us for a few hours. kept everything chilled out, which i'm grateful for. it was personal and i didn't really want to share it with anybody else until i'd had some time to take it in and find the vibe to myself. my wife fell asleep and the nurse gave him to me and he slept on me for about an hour in the early morning hours with the may sun just starting to light up the sky a bit. when my folks finally got there, we'd finally had a little rest, they'd had a little rest and everything was much better. if we'd been in ecuador, i would have had to share all of it with at least a dozen people immediately.

    conserve energy.

  19. #169
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    Sep 2001
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    Not that I wish someone had tried to tell me, since generally, as evidenced, one can get tired of the oceans of advice spewed, but the greatest realization about kids is how much they're just prepackaged.

    Sure, you can probably dent them up a bunch by some horrendous activity, but I concede how much more it seems like it's nature over nuture.

    So take a large lump of what the fuck in doing what you can do to benefit your spawn, but in my experience, the things are significantly preprogrammed by the parents genes. Not that it makes parenting easy, but take it easy on exerting yourself to get things "just right", whatever that is, because there's only so much you can do.
    Merde De Glace On the Freak When Ski
    >>>200 cm Black Bamboo Sidewalled DPS Lotus 120 : Best Skis Ever <<<

  20. #170
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
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    On The Flipside
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    853
    Quote Originally Posted by wyeaster View Post

    oh, here's some advice that some might not agree with. if you have highly emotional or shall we say, involved, parents and that is a big stress not everybody has to be around all the time. i don't know how it worked for anybody else but my folks intended to be there 24/7 but dealing with them during the wait when we were both so exhausted was too much. nothing happened in the evening so i sent my folks home and we'd see them in the morning. my wife went into labor at 4am and i decided not to call them and my son was out at 445 and honestly, as much as i love my folks i was glad it was just the three of us for a few hours. kept everything chilled out, which i'm grateful for. it was personal and i didn't really want to share it with anybody else until i'd had some time to take it in and find the vibe to myself. my wife fell asleep and the nurse gave him to me and he slept on me for about an hour in the early morning hours with the may sun just starting to light up the sky a bit. when my folks finally got there, we'd finally had a little rest, they'd had a little rest and everything was much better. if we'd been in ecuador, i would have had to share all of it with at least a dozen people immediately.

    conserve energy.
    exactly, and if you don't feel comfortable kicking out family the nurses are happy to do it for you. In fact use the nurses as much as you can, they are super helpful and always willing to get you what you need.

    Also, bring food for yourself to the hospital. If your tank is empty its harder to take care of mama and the baby.

  21. #171
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
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    PNW
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    Quote Originally Posted by mtngirl79 View Post
    ....Then one day I looked close. She didn't have a baby, she had a doll...
    Probably shoplifting. Some folks wrap their dolls in foil-lined blankets to fool the scanners at the door. Fuckin thieves.

  22. #172
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Minnesota
    Posts
    2,178
    For me, I wish I would've taken the advice " enjoy every moment, this will fly by". It really does seem like yesterday that my daughter was sitting in a bouncy chair and now we're touring colleges. Just writing this gets me to tear up a bit. Take every moment you can with your little one, take pictures of course, but put the camera down too and really be in the moment. What I wouldn't give for one day cuddling on the couch watching some Disney movie for the millionth time.
    Five minutes into the drive and you're already driving me crazy...

  23. #173
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I smell poutine!!!
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    Quote Originally Posted by concretejungle View Post
    Whiskey. You don't have enough time for beer.
    Mom gets to have the time to drink whatever the fuck she wants. She earned it. Whiskey is the pro tip for dads.
    Real VTers tap trees.

  24. #174
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    Oct 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post
    Think about 2

    It's a fact that a breast fed only baby will not eat more than they need. Also there is really something to be said fir the magic of a boob in mouth calm down. Furthermore I would question anyone that suggests to pause before responding to a babies needs. That's contrary to all recent research.
    Give him a break, he doesn't even have a kid yet. I think people should refrain from giving parental advice unless they have a kid that has survived past toddlehood or they have more than one kid.

    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post
    Irl truth for me. Freak-to boring dad in mini van.
    Quote Originally Posted by iceman View Post
    I mean you gotta own it, it's all good, but man does it cause some boring-ass discussions. Just do your best.
    I love it when I had the girls out solo to a play group or some kid activity, talking to all the moms. Women are a trip, in a good way.

  25. #175
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I smell poutine!!!
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    And watch what you say around young kids. It seems like a duh. However, you learn a lot about your own foul mouth when your two year old repeats it all. At the worst possible time. I learned that I say Jesus Christ a lot...
    Real VTers tap trees.

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