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  1. 10-21-2015, 09:22 AM #1
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    Yelp Sues South Park

    Yelp is suing South Park because they made fun of the pathetic fucks who post reviews on their site:

    http://nbc.com.co/yelp-sues-south-pa...-over-episode/
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  2. 10-21-2015, 09:28 AM #2
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    Matt Stone and Trey Parker's official statement is freaking hilarious:

    “We’ve taken a hard look at the information presented to us, and after reviewing it, we have given Yelp and their lawsuit only one star. Their lawyers delivered us legal documents in a very unprofessional manner; not bothering to smile or even a quick handshake. The writing on the envelope was barely legible and in two different colors. It is our personal opinion that Yelp could do a much better job by not suing us for ten million dollars.”
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  3. 10-21-2015, 09:30 AM #3
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    CC's poor review of Yelp was great, only one star.

    I agree it is a constitutional right for Americans to be assholes...its just too bad that so many take the opportunity...    iscariot
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  4. 10-21-2015, 09:30 AM #4
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    Haha that's awesome
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  5. 10-21-2015, 09:38 AM #5
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    https://www.facebook.com/fappythedolphin
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  6. 10-21-2015, 09:56 AM #6
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    I'm one of the pathetic fucks who posts the occasional review on yelp. I like to give positive reviews to local businesses that deserve it and look they could use the business. I've thought about giving a really negative review of the Donner Lake Kitchen--like I got salmonella--'cause I can never get a table there on the weekend.
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  7. 10-21-2015, 10:05 AM #7
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    I mean, we knew it was satire when fappy stepped in ....
    "The world is a very puzzling place. If you're not willing to be puzzled you just become a replica of someone else's mind." Chomsky

    "This system make of us slaves. Without dignity. Without depth. No? With a devil in our pocket. This incredible money in our pocket. This money. This shit. This nothing. This paper who have nothing inside." Jodorowsky
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  8. 10-21-2015, 10:17 AM #8
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    Yeah, I'd believe that Yelp could conceivably sue South Park (stupider lawsuits happen every day), but once they cited Fappy they tipped their hand.

    Praise Fappy!
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  9. 10-21-2015, 10:55 AM #9
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    Theres a self service donations only coffee shop that I know of with a one star review on yep for poor service. It really seems like the person was serious too. Gold.
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  10. 10-21-2015, 11:55 AM #10
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    I recently got a negative Yelp review by a crazy client who had no idea what the fuck she was taking about. I tend to think most negative reviews are by unbalanced people when you read how incoherent most posts are.

    SP should charge Yelp for all the traffic it will direct that way. It's a fucken comedy show...Yelp needs to get a life (if such a thing is possible for a site run by internet geeks.)

    I agree it is a constitutional right for Americans to be assholes...its just too bad that so many take the opportunity...    iscariot
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  11. 10-21-2015, 12:18 PM #11
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    We have a local brewpub that is also a bakery. Glutards have ripped them apart on yelp. Why the fuck would you go to a place that serves beer and bread and complain about gluten?
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  12. 10-21-2015, 12:23 PM #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by shredgnar View Post
    Why the fuck would you go to a place that serves beer and bread and complain about gluten?
    Because they are idiots?
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  13. 10-21-2015, 12:54 PM #13
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    customer is always right - lol
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  14. 10-21-2015, 12:55 PM #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by shredgnar View Post
    We have a local brewpub that is also a bakery. Glutards have ripped them apart on yelp. Why the fuck would you go to a place that serves beer and bread and complain about gluten?
    DBS is gluten intolerant...or at least he was on step 9.
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  15. 10-21-2015, 12:58 PM #15
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    If I'm in a new area and have no clue about where to eat I look at Yelp. I don't think it has ever sent me anyplace bad.
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  16. 10-21-2015, 01:11 PM #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by shredgnar View Post
    We have a local brewpub that is also a bakery. Glutards have ripped them apart on yelp. Why the fuck would you go to a place that serves beer and bread and complain about gluten?
    You said it yourself; Glutards.

    And it's the age of the entitled, dickhead internet reviewer.
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  17. 10-21-2015, 01:43 PM #17
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    I looked at a yelp review for a local alignment place and they had a bad review. The husband of a customer complained that the shop gave away his wife's 1:00 pm appointment because his wife showed up at 1:10. The shop made the top of my list for getting my truck aligned.
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  18. 10-21-2015, 01:51 PM #18
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    Wait, wait! The writers of South Park direct the legal department at Yelp?
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  19. 10-21-2015, 06:15 PM #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by AaronWright View Post
    I looked at a yelp review for a local alignment place and they had a bad review. The husband of a customer complained that the shop gave away his wife's 1:00 pm appointment because his wife showed up at 1:10. The shop made the top of my list for getting my truck aligned.
    It pays to look at those reviews.
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  20. 10-21-2015, 06:39 PM #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Todds View Post
    If I'm in a new area and have no clue about where to eat I look at Yelp. I don't think it has ever sent me anyplace bad.
    Yeah, pretty much. Then go to TripAdvisor.
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  21. 10-21-2015, 06:46 PM #21
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    Fuck Yelp. As a business owner, those fuck heads contact me constantly to advertise on their site. I always tell them to fuck off, as their computer shit cans all the good reviews I received. What is up with that? A computer decides if a review meets Yelps bullshit logarithm???
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    I think you'd have an easier time understanding people if you remembered that 80% of them are fucking morons.
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  22. 10-21-2015, 07:01 PM #22
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    The logarithm factors in how much you advertise. Or not. Haven't you heard?
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  23. 10-21-2015, 08:02 PM #23
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    Yelp is stealing the Better Business Bureau's lunch. Same retarded shit. Don't give them money.
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  24. 10-21-2015, 08:31 PM #24
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    I couldn't give a shit about a yelper until they had a promotion at Anchorage Brewing Company for yelpees, of which a grand total of 2 showed up! I never yelped a lick or a click but I drank the best beer in town for free that day and even got a handy key fob.

    Ever since that encounter I've determined that they do indeed deserve my shit, and I will give it to them freely, whenever nature yelps
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  25. 10-21-2015, 09:28 PM #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by shredgnar View Post
    We have a local brewpub that is also a bakery. Glutards have ripped them apart on yelp. Why the fuck would you go to a place that serves beer and bread and complain about gluten?
    I'll never forget this...I was at a neighborhood bar that has all you can eat wings for $6 on wednesdays. Its always packed to the gills and the bartenders are busy as shit. One fuck stick is at the bar taking up the bartenders time asking about the wings and if the sauces and breading are gluten free...mind you this is a pretty divey bar with $6 all-u-can-fucking-eat-wings. After about five minutes the bartender says "look man I don't know, do you want to order?". The fucking asshat says yeah two orders of the hot and a pitcher of BUD LIGHT.

    I've never wanted to cold cock sucker punch someone so bad in my life.
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