Tammy Wynette cannot be reached for help-Divorce advice

[liv2ski]

So you're thinking about taking up farming?

Yup, I want to move to Montana and raise me some dental floss.

[Cheeseburger King]

It takes a lot of working at the relationship, self sacrifice and just letting shit go to have a lasting relationship IMO. I love being the mom and dad that hung in there for my kids, but some days I am just over it and ready to bale. I am sure she feels the same way, but we keep trying to have fun together and hang in there. It ain't easy, but we do have our great moments after 39 years together.

You are lucky. Very lucky.

Not living with my son is very tough on me. It's been almost 3 years and it doesn't get any easier.

[oftpiste]

Not living with my son is very tough on me. It's been almost 3 years and it doesn't get any easier.

I can only imagine how badly that sucks. I'm so sorry. One positive in my 4 year shitshow was that by the time a parenting agreement was made my youngest was 3 months from turning 18. Hang in there.

[throwitaway9876]

Checking in.

International trip with PNG (promising new girl) was fun- we met up in a far flung country in Latin America and bounced around for three days. Lots of hiking and good meals. That said, not sure how much of a spark is there. She's pretty committed to her work and seems to have trouble emotionally connecting. Saw her last week in a city where we both happened to be for work and grabbed dinner and drinks two different nights. I don't know if I see things progressing anytime soon with only seeing her once or twice a month.

MBG (mountain bike girl) is now moved in and living in my basement. Have been hanging with her a bit. Went skiing with her and her brother recently. She's a pretty damn good skier. Her bro is fun to hang with. Have been cooking dinner with her, taking our pups for walks, etc. We're both into running and fitness (she's a fitness instructor as a side gig to her government job). I put on a hockey game the other night and she started talking the rivalry between her hometown team and mine- was talking about specific players, the history of the rivalry, etc. She cuddled up with me on the couch to watch the game.

Without some serious course correction I think we both know what this is trending towards. Friends have been a mix between "definitely don't do it" and "have fun and see what happens". I've thus far kept MBG in the dark about other girls I've been hanging with. She knows I'm out with other women at times, but I haven't given her details. Pretty sure that her wondering where I've been has created attraction...

My ex found out about MBG moving in (ironically, they met a couple years ago on a MTB trip) and she has been in full on "let's get back together, you're my one true love" mode. I let her watch our dog while I was on a recent work trip. She's on a self improvement kick and has been trying really hard to win me back. Just don't know if I could ever trust her.

On a lighter note, my across the street neighbor is a retired guy who is fun to chat with. He spends his days patrolling at a local mountain. He met my ex and I a couple times, then a month I was hanging with PNG unloading skis as neighbor guy walked by to talk. He thought he had met PNG before (confusing her with my ex) and then the other night MBG and I were out walking our dogs and he said hi and talked to us for a bit. MGB and PNG look pretty similar, so he's pretty confused in a "glitch in the matrix" kind of way. Like, "is this the same girl? I think I've met her before." I think I need to walk over and shoot the shit with him and bring him up to speed.

[skaredshtles]

[S_jenks]

[EZB]

You have a landlord/tenant relationship. I think you lose the legal right to evict her if you proceed to date her, then either of you decide to stop the dating -- the eviction would look like retaliation for the loss of a quid pro quo I believe.

[mtngirl79]

Once I was complaining about attracting a certain type of degenerate kind of man.

One of my best friends, the only one that I can count on for 100% truth and good insight says, no, Julie, you are attracted to that.

He is 100% right.

Probably take a stroll around what you really want before proceeding...

[Dantheman]

Not living with my son is very tough on me. It's been almost 3 years and it doesn't get any easier.

Breaks my heart to even think about living apart from my son.

You have a landlord/tenant relationship. I think you lose the legal right to evict her if you proceed to date her, then either of you decide to stop the dating -- the eviction would look like retaliation for the loss of a quid pro quo I believe.

Just one of many potential pitfalls. That said, a friend of mine went down that path and over ten years on they're still together. YMMV.

[Marshall Tucker]

As utterly foreign, and repulsive, as it may sound. I come from a time and place were we take very seriously the vows we make before many. We even did and do quiant things like observe organized religion.

I beleive I chose wisely, one who thought and thinks the same. "unto death do you part." 3 kids, two houses, A cherokee, BMW, Sebring, Solara and 28 years later (well 2 weeks shy). it ain't been no cakewalk, I can assure you.

If you need to think it's dumb luck. thats fine. If you need to think I feel superior, that's fine too. fuck ya. I know different. Saw her at the back of the church 05.04.1991 and thought she will look pretty as we grow old. and I've been right so far.

[RootSkier]

As utterly foreign, and repulsive, as it may sound. I come from a time and place were we take very seriously the vows we make before many.

Dude, shut the fuck up. This is not the the thread to get all high and mighty in.

[skaredshtles]

Dude, shut the fuck up. This is not the the thread to get all high and mighty in.

Agreed. Perhaps start his own married smug-twat thread?

[Marshall Tucker]

ah fuck it. flame on. I can take it.

[throwitaway9876]

How many hot pockets ya need, bruh?

Will let you know when I know.

[PNWbrit]

I beleive I chose wisely

What color is the

Solara

[GiBo]

As utterly foreign, and repulsive, as it may sound. I come from a time and place were we take very seriously the vows we make before many. We even did and do quiant things like observe organized religion.

I beleive I chose wisely, one who thought and thinks the same. "unto death do you part." 3 kids, two houses, A cherokee, BMW, Sebring, Solara and 28 years later (well 2 weeks shy). it ain't been no cakewalk, I can assure you.

If you need to think it's dumb luck. thats fine. If you need to think I feel superior, that's fine too. fuck ya. I know different. Saw her at the back of the church 05.04.1991 and thought she will look pretty as we grow old. and I've been right so far.

Doubling down on the smug in a thread about others misfortune. WWJD?

[oftpiste]

MT,

it's pretty outrageous to even ponder the suggestion that those of us whose marriages have not survived our previously-thought 'wise choices' did anything less than take our vows seriously. That's where you sound smug, and it's pretty fucked up.

I hope you do grow old together and continue on that lovely path. However, I'm sure I'm not alone in this thread when I say I once was completely convinced of exactly the same thing. I couldn't imagine things going a different way. But they did.

So, practice much gratitude and don't forget that nothing, anywhere, ever is permanent. If you have that cemented in your mind if things go south it might be easier to get through.

[frorider]

I beleive I chose wisely

Go on..

Sebring, Solara

Lol

(Edit: Hmm pnw felt similarly)

[XXX-er]

Perhaps YMMV, I was feeling smug cuz I divorced well & got out of it with half my shit ?

[Gcooker]

Perhaps YMMV, I was feeling smug cuz I divorced well & got out of it with half my shit ?

Now that is something to be proud of.

[XXX-er]

smug OR proud, OR lucky to dodge a bullet ?

did I mention there was nothing wrong with #1

I was #2

she just married # 5 ?

when should one realize the time to fish or the time to cut bait ?

[Dantheman]

Sebring

[Gcooker]

That’s a PT Cruiser bro, which is even worse


Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

[oftpiste]

she just married # 5 ?

I always wonder what goes through the mind of someone who's marrying someone who's been married that many times. Isn't that a red flag? Does the new spouse think they're so special it's all going to be different with them?

[MakersTeleMark]

This has been posted succinctly in this thread in the past, but it bears repetition:

Marraige is just a legal contract. The moral "till death" stuff, is just in your belief system.

My first live together girlfriend, from 19-30, refused to marry, because she was wise and realized that if the commitment is there, a piece of paper doesn't mean shit.

On the other hand, I've laid it down to my last girlfriend that I would never propose. She accepted a prior proposal from someone else out of not wanting to hurt his feelings because he took her out for a big weekend.

After 9 years, she never asked, and I would have said no anyway, just based on her mental state.