Tammy Wynette cannot be reached for help-Divorce advice

**Dantheman** · 09-01-2022, 01:47 PM

Originally Posted by AK47bp

Also if she is wearing an Apple Watch she may have “find my location” activated and he can log into the account and see where she is.

Similarly, with the car I'm pretty sure it's a fancy late-model car that has some kind of "find my car" feature built in, so it's not just a matter of finding a tracker and removing it.

**uglymoney** · 09-01-2022, 02:08 PM

Happened to my wife's friend. She got rid of him her way but he went on to kill his next wife in a murder suicide. Thankfully not me, the night I stayed at their house.

I'd be reluctant to get advice on how to deal with this from anything less than experts in this field, definitely not LEO'S or internet strangers.

**Buzzworthy** · 09-01-2022, 02:25 PM

Originally Posted by altachic

Her husband has absolutely, completely lost it. I feel awful for him because he's now so far emotionally and mentally unstable and he can't even see it. He needs SO much help but refuses to get it.
I keep saying I'll let them stay here but I just feel super uncomfortable knowing he's out there. He also has two brothers living fairly close and who knows what he's telling them or if he's with them. All three of them could, at anytime go to their home if she's there so she's 1000% trapped.
She is getting a cop to escort her to their home today so she can get a big bag of stuff for she and her son.
If any of you have experience with this, as being the friend is there any advice you have for me? What should I say or do or NOT say or do? I'm just trying to check in on here and be available to keep her dog when needed. It's just horribly sad, especially for their nine year old son.

You’re number one goal is to keep your little one safe. My only recommendation would be to make your decisions to help based on that.
I’m very sorry to hear about your friend. It’s a really horrible situation.

**Choss Jonger, Sr.** · 09-01-2022, 02:28 PM

Fuck the police. I have never seen a situation so bad that the police cannot make it worse.

I have secured a good friend to come with me back to the marital home tomorrow to retrieve the rest of my shit and to inspect condition of my largest asset. Both the SO and The PD refuse to provide peace officer standby because there is no court order.

She is gonna flip when or if she sees me towing two shiny new KTMs behind my old truck. Payback is a bitch and stuff.

And yes, all y’all that suggested detaching from any imperative for “justice” or fairness or rightness were correct. It is a lot easier to enjoy getting fucked when one just accepts being the receiver of a wicked pseudo-rectifying massive state phallus in the rear.

**altachic** · 09-01-2022, 02:49 PM

I let her know today when she picked the dog up that I can help with him if/when she has court appts but beyond that DTM and I will need to NOT be involved. I made sure to tell her to use the resources she's been given for help (not the actual police) and to reach out to those in their professional fields. She's already done a lot today and made many phone calls. She's packing up and going to stay with family for a while. Heartbreaking.

**gravitylover** · 09-01-2022, 03:51 PM

Originally Posted by Dantheman

Similarly, with the car I'm pretty sure it's a fancy late-model car that has some kind of "find my car" feature built in, so it's not just a matter of finding a tracker and removing it.

Haha, have her park the car at a Police station and pick her up.

**Meadow Skipper** · 09-01-2022, 05:34 PM

Originally Posted by Dantheman

Similarly, with the car I'm pretty sure it's a fancy late-model car that has some kind of "find my car" feature built in, so it's not just a matter of finding a tracker and removing it.

That’s kind of a problem. IME Audis and Teslas have tracking on their apps. I don’t know if there’s some way to cut off the tracking feature once someone has the app and info. There should be.

**byates1** · 09-01-2022, 06:12 PM

Someone else can book an Airbnb for her. Someone else rent a car. New phone. Poof. Gone.

Gnarly story. Ppl are insane. Best of luck.

**oftpiste** · 09-01-2022, 06:16 PM

Originally Posted by Meadow Skipper

iPhone as well.

I just presumed anyone in that kind of an awful situation what have already covered those bases. Sure hope so.

**altachic** · 09-01-2022, 06:17 PM

Ha! If only it were as simple as Poof. Gone.
Apparently he came back to their house, after being told by the cops he's being served and to stay way...etc, etc and took a bunch of cash, removed her as a driver from their Tesla amongst other things. He's going to go crazy before they even start in with the lawyers they've now hired next week. They own five storage unit business (out of state) together and just built a $1.2 million home just east of us, so two mortgages right now. It's going to get REALLY UGLY.

**oftpiste** · 09-01-2022, 06:32 PM

Originally Posted by Choss Jonger, Sr.

And yes, all y’all that suggested detaching from any imperative for “justice” or fairness or rightness were correct. It is a lot easier to enjoy getting fucked when one just accepts being the receiver of a wicked pseudo-rectifying massive state phallus in the rear.

I dunno about enjoying getting fucked (that kind of fucked anyway), but tolerating it perhaps. You're not alone!

My exes family has money, and her dad had died not too long before we split. Of course I had no claim to that $ and wouldn't have gone after it anyway, but at one point she said to me she would never be getting any of the family dough as it was all going in trust for the kids (ours and her sib's kids). I knew that was bullshit at the time. Made no sense. She came at me with guns blazing during the settlement stage (all her atty fees paid by her mom) for very dime she could, and it quite nearly ruined me financially.

Four years later, she just bought a 2 million dollar waterfront house on the Salish Sea. She paid cash. She has not sold the property she got in the divorce, nor does she make that kind of money. Go figure. The family money never was applied to our lives as a couple beyond a $40k gift to buy our first house very early on, which I later leveraged into some good investment properties, one of which she ended up with.

It's a head shaker, and admittedly hard to swallow after the way I was treated, but getting out of that marriage is still the best thing that ever happened to me.

**oftpiste** · 09-01-2022, 06:33 PM

Jeezus. Ugly is hardly the word. Keep yourselves safe, and I hope she stays safe too. Really fucking scary.

Originally Posted by altachic

Ha! If only it were as simple as Poof. Gone.
Apparently he came back to their house, after being told by the cops he's being served and to stay way...etc, etc and took a bunch of cash, removed her as a driver from their Tesla amongst other things. He's going to go crazy before they even start in with the lawyers they've now hired next week. They own five storage unit business (out of state) together and just built a $1.2 million home just east of us, so two mortgages right now. It's going to get REALLY UGLY.

**~mikey b** · 09-01-2022, 07:00 PM

Originally Posted by Meadow Skipper

It’s kind of fun to think of what you could do with the tracker if you found one. Potential hilarity.

how do you think I knew you went to NZ?

**TBS** · 09-01-2022, 09:44 PM

@AC&Dan - Can your friend get the STBEx’s guns taken away in a ‘red flag’ order? You can get one in OR if person poses risk to self or others. Don’t know about UT.

**altachic** · 09-02-2022, 12:37 PM

Originally Posted by TBS

@AC&Dan - Can your friend get the STBEx’s guns taken away in a ‘red flag’ order? You can get one in OR if person poses risk to self or others. Don’t know about UT.

She actually told me that when/if they find him (that was very late Wed night thankfully they found him) if he had a gun they'd confiscate it. So as far as she knows right now, they took it.

**~mikey b** · 09-02-2022, 02:47 PM

not to make light of the situation

but it is TGR

so….

https://youtu.be/hM27aRWdqpY

**zion zig zag** · 09-02-2022, 04:47 PM

Originally Posted by altachic

She actually told me that when/if they find him (that was very late Wed night thankfully they found him) if he had a gun they'd confiscate it. So as far as she knows right now, they took it.

He only owns one gun? That has to be an anomaly in Utah.

**m2711c** · 09-02-2022, 05:07 PM

Originally Posted by ~mikey b

not to make light of the situation

but it is TGR

so….

https://youtu.be/hM27aRWdqpY

Holy shit, that’s gotta be Colin’s theme song…

**TahoeJ** · 09-02-2022, 05:14 PM

Originally Posted by Supermoon

Since almost half of all cops admit to committing DV

I was about to call BS on this but then looked it up and... wow. I knew it was prevalent, but not that bad. https://www.fatherly.com/life/police...estic-violence

"The major study here was done by a police officer and a sociologist in Tucson, Arizona, working with a collaborator who had studied domestic violence in military families. It wasn’t by the police department officially. That study found that 40 percent of cops reported having participated in domestic violence in the previous year. The researchers questioned spouses and officers separately with anonymous questions and came up with strikingly similar figures."

Holy shit...

**Supermoon** · 09-02-2022, 05:23 PM

Originally Posted by TahoeJ

I was about to call BS on this but then looked it up and... wow. I knew it was prevalent, but not that bad. https://www.fatherly.com/life/police...estic-violence

"The major study here was done by a police officer and a sociologist in Tucson, Arizona, working with a collaborator who had studied domestic violence in military families. It wasn’t by the police department officially. That study found that 40 percent of cops reported having participated in domestic violence in the previous year. The researchers questioned spouses and officers separately with anonymous questions and came up with strikingly similar figures."

Holy shit...

Yeah, what's wild is that it's self-reported

**Choss Jonger, Sr.** · 09-04-2022, 05:10 PM

Neither PD nor SO would show up for civil standby when I went to retrieve the rest of my belongings two days ago….something about a Racism and Donuts gathering.

Thank goodness for the brother I have in old Sal. He helped me to release the fact that half the town is banging the stbx, to get my shit and get out. Peace be upon all in such situations.

**summit** · 09-07-2022, 08:55 AM

Altachic and DTM, have your friend read this book, particularly if she has kids: https://www.amazon.com/Splitting-Pro.../dp/1608820254

It is a short read, and helpful, for anyone leaving a partner who is Borderline and/or Narcissistic.

**Choss Jonger, Sr.** · 10-05-2022, 03:38 PM

just took a day off work to spend waiting to tell the judge that any fucking day, any any any, day will work for me to get this divorce party kicked off. Looks like next year maybe the state will do something to get this done LOL.

The irony of that rotten cunt still camping on my equity in the marital home when my tiny little new human being arrives into the loving home I am creating with my GF is thick.

Fuck the state, and woe betide those that voluntarily join so broken a system. Prenups each and every fucking time.