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  1. #6201
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    Mar 2019
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    2,100
    ^fascinating

  2. #6202
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Not in the PRB
    Posts
    32,785
    Quote Originally Posted by mcphee View Post
    ^you’re divorced? Huh, you never mention it.
    lol
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "everybody's got their hooks into you, fuck em....forge on motherfuckers, drag all those bitches across the goal line with you." - (not so) ill-advised strategy

  3. #6203
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Access to Granlibakken
    Posts
    11,184
    Click image for larger version. 

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  4. #6204
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    northern BC
    Posts
    30,885
    fuck, i didnt know about the beanie baby collection

    I wonder what else she was holding out on ?
    Lee Lau - xxx-er is the laziest Asian canuck I know

  5. #6205
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    Bend
    Posts
    1,350
    I lost a pair of skis in the divorce. True story.

  6. #6206
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    on the banks of Fish Creek
    Posts
    7,514
    did she take ‘em cause fuck you or was she gonna ski ‘em?

  7. #6207
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    Bend
    Posts
    1,350
    Quote Originally Posted by m2711c View Post
    did she take ‘em cause fuck you or was she gonna ski ‘em?
    She loved them. She was a snowboarder and learned to ski the last 4 or 5 years we were together.

    I gave them to her because I knew how much she wanted them. Pretty amicable split. It was still hard but we were able to stay friends.

  8. #6208
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    8,404
    I'm eternally grateful she somehow forgot about the several hundred bottles of wine in the basement. Considering how deep her lawyer kept digging I was always waiting for that shoe to drop.
    Quote Originally Posted by Foggy_Goggles View Post
    If I lived in WA, Oft would be my realtor. Seriously.

  9. #6209
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    champlain valley
    Posts
    5,656
    Quote Originally Posted by Danno View Post
    Got the piece of paper today. It's been a long road, but one unlike the stories in here. I'm stoked to be free, and I'm stoked that my kiddo is doing well.
    I’m sorry to learn of your divorce

    But, there is always a but, that you wrote unlike the stories on here is Danny being the pompous cunt again.

    There are many guys that have noted they had an amicable divorce.

    It just doesn’t generate responses


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

  10. #6210
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    the Low Sierra
    Posts
    17,818
    as I said, my best to the ex
    I didn't believe in reincarnation when I was your age either.

  11. #6211
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Southeast New York
    Posts
    11,767
    Ya know those times when she unloads on you and you only go halfway on your responses? Yeah, that was tonight because finishing my thoughts would've left me in some of your shoes. Fuckn chick lost it when I put myself between her and the kidz. I get that she's in one of the toughest spots in her life, she doesn't think so but whatever I can live with that, but damn the level of hate she spewed towards the world outside her head was stuff I didn't want to know was in there. After 27 years you'd think I knew it was there but this was a special kind of outburst and it has me thinking seriously about how to move forward and I don't like it.

  12. #6212
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    7,455
    Fuck em in the ass throw em over the bridge "

    Biggie

  13. #6213
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Southeast New York
    Posts
    11,767
    Well that was helpful. Thanks.

  14. #6214
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    7,455
    I try

  15. #6215
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Location
    SLC, Utah
    Posts
    4,286
    Quote Originally Posted by gravitylover View Post
    Ya know those times when she unloads on you and you only go halfway on your responses? Yeah, that was tonight because finishing my thoughts would've left me in some of your shoes. Fuckn chick lost it when I put myself between her and the kidz. I get that she's in one of the toughest spots in her life, she doesn't think so but whatever I can live with that, but damn the level of hate she spewed towards the world outside her head was stuff I didn't want to know was in there. After 27 years you'd think I knew it was there but this was a special kind of outburst and it has me thinking seriously about how to move forward and I don't like it.
    So sorry man. That shit is rough. One of my best friends is separating from his wife this weekend and it just breaks me apart. It's so sad.

    I figure I owe this group an update: still progressing towards divorce with my ex, and things are remarkably amicable. We're good friends; I truly want the best for her. She's a great person, she (really, we - it takes two to tango) just made a series of choices which made our marriage completely untenable, romantically. She is a phenomenal person and I am glad to have had her as my companion for so many good years.

    Regarding the woman I started seeing right after the ex left; things are better than I ever thought possible, and we're over a year in. This isn't the rose colored glasses either - we've dealt with difficult situations together and seen each other during some pretty tough times, but what started as a small ray of hope and humanity during some of the darkest days of my life has now blossomed into the brightest and most beautiful relationship I could ever have imagined. We are emotionally, physically, intellectually, and sexually unbelievably well suited towards each other.

    Untangling cause and condition is impossible; I don't believe in fate or in any sort of teleology, but what I do know is that my life is brimming with happiness and joy in a way that I never thought possible, certainly not during my lowest lows.

    I hope all you mags can find happiness as well. It absolutely gets better.



    Sent from my Pixel 6 Pro using Tapatalk

  16. #6216
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Truckee & Nor Cal
    Posts
    15,621

    Tammy Wynette cannot be reached for help-Divorce advice

    Quote Originally Posted by gravitylover View Post
    Ya know those times when she unloads on you and you only go halfway on your responses? Yeah, that was tonight because finishing my thoughts would've left me in some of your shoes. Fuckn chick lost it when I put myself between her and the kidz. I get that she's in one of the toughest spots in her life, she doesn't think so but whatever I can live with that, but damn the level of hate she spewed towards the world outside her head was stuff I didn't want to know was in there. After 27 years you'd think I knew it was there but this was a special kind of outburst and it has me thinking seriously about how to move forward and I don't like it.
    Oof. I think what happens the next day (or more so her actions the next day) is the most important thing. Sometimes just simple silence and calm in the face of adversity and chaos is the most powerful tool. Probably more often than not.
    Last edited by TahoeJ; 06-03-2023 at 09:57 PM.
    I ski 135 degree chutes switch to the road.

  17. #6217
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Southeast New York
    Posts
    11,767
    I'm gonna try to stay out of the way today.

  18. #6218
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    the Low Sierra
    Posts
    17,818
    or just move on

    it’s ok to move on from that shit
    I didn't believe in reincarnation when I was your age either.

  19. #6219
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Location
    Mostly the Elks, mostly.
    Posts
    1,279
    yikes GL.
    i'm sorry. i think going halfway in responses was smart. be present, acknowledge and interact and respond, but minimize your own emotional reactivity. solid. no sense in both of you saying (and doing) over-the-line stuff. i hope you didn't have to physically put yourself in front of the kids for safety. that's scary, and on the verge of something else entirely.
    also smart to give a wide berth a day or 2. it might give that wave of whatever-that-was a chance to pass on its own. maybe it was hormonal or emotional or stress-driven or chemical, or some combination .. but if it's more of an isolated thing, 27 years together and a family, she might appreciate the benefit of the doubt to take a breath and recenter.
    once calmer heads prevail, you might ask if she remembers what she said to you (and the kids) - and if she truly believes it, sadly it maybe time for some bigger conversations. and if not, it's also time to figure some things out.

    to mikey's point - nobody deserves to be treated like that, definitely not kids (even if they screwed up). having boundaries is a good thing. i'm not saying it's as simple as just moving on, but i think it's fair to say you and your kids should get some resolve when the time is right - one way or the other. it might be worth jotting down some notes on dates, what was said, getting between the kids, follow through, and whatnot - doesn't hurt to have. might be helpful if things spiral.

    sorry you're dealing with it GL. it's so hard to be on the receiving end when someone else checks out. been there. wouldn't wish it on anyone.
    good luck man. pulling for you. reach out if we can help.



    thx for the update tgapp :-) so happy for you!
    guess the ski date went ok!
    north bound horse.

  20. #6220
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    the Low Sierra
    Posts
    17,818
    yeah not saying it’s easy

    but being treated like shit sucks
    I didn't believe in reincarnation when I was your age either.

  21. #6221
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Location
    New Mexico
    Posts
    1,237
    Quote Originally Posted by gravitylover View Post
    I'm gonna try to stay out of the way today.
    Not an advice for the situation cause only you know what going on but in general consider word “abuse” or “abusive.” Any women’s group would be throwing this heavy term if the situation was reversed. But if you do not feel like being yourself and need to “stay out of the way”, how would we call it?

    Regardless, talking through and about the situation is needed. May be with a trusted third party present. “Hey, we need to talk about that screaming and the things you said. It made me feel like …” Depending on how that goes, it’ll e good opportunity to set the boundaries.

    Definitely good move on not escalating situation. Retaliation foul always gets whistled on.

    Sorry about your troubles. Vibes.

  22. #6222
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    1,007
    My biggest regret the last 7 months has not been taking good accurate notes on the days events and the things yelled/said. You never take that step until its too late and things have already begun to unravel, and those notes can be crucial if the other spouse comes unglued.

  23. #6223
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I can still smell Poutine.
    Posts
    24,513
    You could always try laughing when the spouse is having a tantrum. That works for me. So far. Until the time it doesn't.

  24. #6224
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Location
    New Mexico
    Posts
    1,237
    A friend finalized the divorce few month ago. The process dragged out for years. His ex is a piece of work. Even the judge got sick of her attitude and put her in contempt of court.

  25. #6225
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Southeast New York
    Posts
    11,767
    Thanks guys. Well, the kids blew it up this morning, I think they realized that part of it was me defending them not my wife so they took most of the heat. FWIW it wasn't a physical thing, and wouldn't be, so that's not a problem. The kids said some shit to her that amazed me. I guess at 24 they've sorta found some spine but she got backed into the proverbial corner and that never ends well. She ruminated on it all day, put me on the spot a bunch of times and we played the game. It sucked. We spent a good part of the day apart, the kids went and did their own shit and at the moment it's tense but she hasn't thrown them out yet so...

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