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  1. #4676
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I can still smell Poutine.
    Posts
    18,699
    My wife has so many pairs of box cutters. She breaks down the cardboard like a champ.

  2. #4677
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Knoxville, TN
    Posts
    171
    Found yourself a true unicorn, congrats my friend.

  3. #4678
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Posts
    1,344
    Hey all, Big Dipshit here! I told my wife while we were dating that one of my favorite parts of working a grocery store gig in HS was to break down boxes and use the baler so I could sneak a hitter and a cig while doing so. She took that as I’m some kind of box expert and loves the work.

  4. #4679
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Boulder
    Posts
    1,114
    Quote Originally Posted by AK47bp View Post
    I guess we can add “breakdown boxes” to the list of shit wive’s suck at (but we still love them).

    Packing a car.

    Loading the dishwasher efficiently

    Breaking down cardboard

    Giving a fuck where their fingernails fly when trimming them in the living room (newly added).




    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums
    Ditto. Ditto. Ditto. Ditto.

    Add: deciding that kitchen cleanup is done when she’s tired of cleaning (on her nights to clean) then getting offended when I finish the cleanup job.

  5. #4680
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    633
    Quote Originally Posted by mcphee View Post
    Hey all, Big Dipshit here! I told my wife while we were dating that one of my favorite parts of working a grocery store gig in HS was to break down boxes and use the baler so I could sneak a hitter and a cig while doing so. She took that as I’m some kind of box expert and loves the work.
    The only way out here, is to tell her that you hate that shit, and only said it to get in her pants, because you figured her for the kind of girl who gives it up for guys who have cool grocery-store tales. But that apparently it worked. Godspeed.

  6. #4681
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    8,959
    Quote Originally Posted by mcphee View Post
    Hey all, Big Dipshit here! I told my wife while we were dating that one of my favorite parts of working a grocery store gig in HS was to break down boxes and use the baler so I could sneak a hitter and a cig while doing so. She took that as I’m some kind of box expert and loves the work.
    Just keep taking care of her box so you aren’t kicked to the curb.


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

  7. #4682
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    A LSD Steakhouse somewhere in the Wasatch
    Posts
    13,027
    2 1/2 decades ago i stood hungover to the bejeebus wondering if i was ready, worthy and could keep the vows i planned on making that day in front of our friends and fam in a house of worship

    well yeah i aint fucked it up yet
    jesus hercules christ i am blessed in that decision to share my life passions trials and tribulations and the raising of them goofy newfies
    with such a soulmate
    "When the child was a child it waited patiently for the first snow and it still does"- Van "The Man" Morrison
    "I find I have already had my reward, in the doing of the thing" - Buzz Holmstrom
    "THIS IS WHAT WE DO"-AML -ski on in eternal peace
    "I have posted in here but haven't read it carefully with my trusty PoliAsshat antenna on."-DipshitDanno

  8. #4683
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    2,152
    Congratulations, sfb.


    skiJ

  9. #4684
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Nashville TN
    Posts
    988
    Quote Originally Posted by skiJ View Post
    Congratulations, sfb.


    skiJ
    Hell yes-she likes to row!

  10. #4685
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    The land of Genesee Cream Ale and homemade pierogies!
    Posts
    1,950
    Under this headline

    State’s longest-married couple celebrates 80 years together.

    Is this insight: The husband let everyone in on a little secret to their marriage's longevity: saying "you are right" to his wife all the time.
    “The best argument in favour of a 90% tax rate on the rich is a five-minute chat with the average rich person.”

    - Winston Churchill, paraphrased.

  11. #4686
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    my own little world
    Posts
    4,365

    I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

    We don’t have air conditioning, but trees keep our house nice and shady and it gets cool here at night, so if you open windows at night and close them in the day and manage your comings and goings the house will stay fairly livable.

    I have three dogs who want to follow you in and out and in and out. I ignore this, because they’re just dogs and they don’t need to follow me on a 2 minute errand outside. My fiancé, bless her cute heart, plays doorman for them. So every time she comes and goes she waits for all three to make up their mind to follow her out and then back in.

    And she lets all the warm air in!

    JHC.
    focus.

  12. #4687
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    8,959
    9 months of the year my backyard is a mud pit. So I have a super absorbent mat and a towel right next to the back door. Every time pup comes back in I make him stand on the mat and I wipe his paws.

    Wifey (who works from home) let’s him in and out all day with ZERO paw cleaning. I just stopped asking her to do it because she won’t. It’s not because she’s deliberately not doing it but she is either on her phone or not paying attention and just robotically opens the door for him when he wants in.

    So we have muddy paw prints and muddy carpet and mud on the couch and she’s like “our house is SOO dirty” all the time, and I just bite my tongue.

    This is the same woman that went for a bike ride 2 days ago and forgot to attach her bike to the bike rack on the back of her car. So she drove over 10 miles with the bike just sitting on top of the rack without the straps latched. She realized she fucked up with that so didn’t rub it in.


    So absent minded sometimes.


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

  13. #4688
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Before
    Posts
    25,786
    Quote Originally Posted by skifishbum View Post
    2 1/2 decades ago i stood hungover to the bejeebus wondering if i was ready, worthy and could keep the vows i planned on making that day in front of our friends and fam in a house of worship

    well yeah i aint fucked it up yet
    jesus hercules christ i am blessed in that decision to share my life passions trials and tribulations and the raising of them goofy newfies
    with such a soulmate
    well, she's a keeper fer shure.
    Merde De Glace On the Freak When Ski
    >>>200 cm Black Bamboo Sidewalled DPS Lotus 120 : Best Skis Ever <<<

  14. #4689
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    2,140
    My wife gathers trash and rotting food and coffee drinks in her car and does not throw any of it away for months at a time. It is seriously like a hoarders starter kit and the smell of rotting curdles lattes in the summertime is gag inducing. No amount of heckling and haranging has made her change her ways.

    The catch .22 is that she will only clean it out when her parents come to visit.

  15. #4690
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Way East Tennessee
    Posts
    4,372
    So, my wife has a sheet fetish. She sees high count sheets and they come home. Problem is, she never washes them before she puts them on the bed, so it feels like you have crawled in between two 10'x10' sheets of 2000 grit sand paper.

    So came home from a fishing trip late Monday night, crawled into bed and, you guessed it, sandpaper sheets.

    On top of that, its hitting mid 80's here in East Tennessee at the moment, and she added a fucking blanket to the mix .

    FML.
    In order to properly convert this thread to a polyasshat thread to more fully enrage the liberal left frequenting here...... (insert latest democratic blunder of your choice).

  16. #4691
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Location
    In a van... down by the river
    Posts
    9,812
    Quote Originally Posted by TNKen View Post
    <snip>
    On top of that, its hitting mid 80's here in East Tennessee at the moment, and she added a fucking blanket to the mix .
    Just set the thermostat to 60F. That should help.


  17. #4692
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Access to Granlibakken
    Posts
    9,854
    At least it’s a dry heat
    Improve your AT boots with the StrapOff. It’s Maggot Approved.

  18. #4693
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    PRB
    Posts
    28,192
    Quote Originally Posted by AK47bp View Post
    9 months of the year my backyard is a mud pit. So I have a super absorbent mat and a towel right next to the back door. Every time pup comes back in I make him stand on the mat and I wipe his paws.

    Wifey (who works from home) let’s him in and out all day with ZERO paw cleaning. I just stopped asking her to do it because she won’t. It’s not because she’s deliberately not doing it but she is either on her phone or not paying attention and just robotically opens the door for him when he wants in.

    So we have muddy paw prints and muddy carpet and mud on the couch and she’s like “our house is SOO dirty” all the time, and I just bite my tongue.

    This is the same woman that went for a bike ride 2 days ago and forgot to attach her bike to the bike rack on the back of her car. So she drove over 10 miles with the bike just sitting on top of the rack without the straps latched. She realized she fucked up with that so didn’t rub it in.


    So absent minded sometimes.


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums
    This won't help with the wife, but it's a pretty cool tool for your problem (I just saw it at a friend's house, it works great): https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N52Z30T/
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "I'd eat a bag of Dicks and wash it down with a Coke any day." - iceman

  19. #4694
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    truckee
    Posts
    20,092
    Wonder if that would work on a Bernese.

  20. #4695
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    8,959
    Quote Originally Posted by Danno View Post
    This won't help with the wife, but it's a pretty cool tool for your problem (I just saw it at a friend's house, it works great): https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N52Z30T/
    It’s like a fleshlight for dog paws. May try it out (on the dog)


    Thanks.


    Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

  21. #4696
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    A short flight from altitude
    Posts
    128
    [QUOTE=AK47bp;6626390]It’s like a fleshlight for dog paws. May try it out (on the dog)


    Thanks.





    Number one customer question on Amazon Reviews. "Is this really just for dog paws?"

  22. #4697
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    1,963
    Despite having multiple travel mugs suitable for bringing coffee to work in my wife uses our nice ceramic mugs. One falls out of her bag and breaks every year or two.

  23. #4698
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Stumptown
    Posts
    8,041
    Quote Originally Posted by John_B View Post
    Despite having multiple travel mugs suitable for bringing coffee to work in my wife uses our nice ceramic mugs. One falls out of her bag and breaks every year or two.
    My wife buys all sorts of travel mugs and water bottles, and exactly zero of them fit into our cup holders. So they are either rolling around in a footwell, or precariously balanced on the center console. I even bought her a bottle that holds as much as a Nalgene and fits on a cup holder but she still won’t use it.

    At least they all have lids now. So that’s a small win.

  24. #4699
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    truckee
    Posts
    20,092
    Quote Originally Posted by John_B View Post
    Despite having multiple travel mugs suitable for bringing coffee to work in my wife uses our nice ceramic mugs. One falls out of her bag and breaks every year or two.
    Don't you donate to PBS or NPR every year? Easy way to replace those mugs.

  25. #4700
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    1,963
    Quote Originally Posted by old goat View Post
    Don't you donate to PBS or NPR every year? Easy way to replace those mugs.
    These are a locally made matching set that were wedding gifts. I guess I should be thankful I wasn't the one to knock the handles off of 2 of them.

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