I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

[plugboots]

together for 11 years, going on 8 years of marriage.

I would think you'd be used to it by now.
The other day she did this exact thing to me, and I just got a larger and larger grin, and just started laughing. Made her crack up. She knew I had no idea what the fuck she was talking about.

[Boissal]

you should have understood what i was asking

Story of my life right here.
Ms Boissal is quite stingy with her words and usually I have to guess what she wants/means. If I ask questions I annoy her because she has to break the quiet bubble of the noise cancelling headphones. Then she assumes the question is veiled criticism, because I obviously would be sneaky like that.

The worst of the worst is with her learning French. She claims she doesn't want my help because I make fun of her all the time. The reality is that she will blurt out a French word in the middle of a conversation and the word will have absolutely nothing to do with the topic at hand. Without any context a small issue with pronunciation can make any word unrecognizable so I rarely get what she's trying to say. I'll eventually ask her to spell which pisses her off to no end. I keep telling her it's unfortunate she married someone who's so intellectually challenged he can't even read minds. It doesn't help.

[Core Shot]

Once I heard “move the weed plant”. All the confusion made sense.

[puma]

I can top that. Mine will grab the DIPA (because it's the only beer in the fridge since she forgot to restock the beer she likes), open it and take a sip, say "this is too bitter" and pour it down the sink.

Jesus. I could look past the drinking DIPA out of the can, but this one...painful

[old goat]

Story of my life right here.
Ms Boissal is quite stingy with her words and usually I have to guess what she wants/means. If I ask questions I annoy her because she has to break the quiet bubble of the noise cancelling headphones. Then she assumes the question is veiled criticism, because I obviously would be sneaky like that.

The worst of the worst is with her learning French. She claims she doesn't want my help because I make fun of her all the time. The reality is that she will blurt out a French word in the middle of a conversation and the word will have absolutely nothing to do with the topic at hand. Without any context a small issue with pronunciation can make any word unrecognizable so I rarely get what she's trying to say. I'll eventually ask her to spell which pisses her off to no end. I keep telling her it's unfortunate she married someone who's so intellectually challenged he can't even read minds. It doesn't help.

My wife is most definitely not stingy with words but I still have to guess what she means or wants.

[oftpiste]

Yeah, but she lets you post her great tits in leather on the internet. Trade-offs man, trade-offs.

oh my god, this might be my biggest single frustration. clarity of language. i used to think it was an english-as-a-second language thing; wifey is russian, and while her english is fluent +, some habits (namely, using very few words) die hard. maybe it's a just a wife thing?

she'll ask me shit like "you know how we did that thing a few years ago, wasn't there something we needed to remember so that the other thing doesn't happen again?" or, out of nowhere, with no context clues, she'll ask "hey did you tell him what we talked about?" i used to get sarcastic with her; "oh yeah, totally, i did do the stuff and the thing and all the people have emotions about the words i said", but that would only make her defensive and withdrawn - "you know what i'm talking about".

sometimes she'll use the complete wrong word for something, and then she will be baffled when i don't understand. example from two weeks ago:

wifey: "hey did you remember to turn the furnace on?"
me:"no, we haven't ran the furnace in a few months, it'll get too hot at night"
wifey: "what do you mean we haven't run the furnace? we turn it on every night, and it's not too hot, we need to do it"
me, puzzled - "ohhhh, do you mean the propane heater in the greenhouse?"
wifey: "yes of course, what else did you think i was talking about?"
me: "well a furnace and a propane mr. buddy heater in our greenhouse are two very different things, and you asked about the furnace"
wifey: "well they both create heat, so you should have understood what i was asking"

[tgapp]

Yeah, but she lets you post her great tits in leather on the internet. Trade-offs man, trade-offs.

true, but this thread is "I love my wife and all but Jesus Hercules Christ"

just two minutes ago -

we've started to have a problem with clothing moths lately, and I hear her yelling irrationally loudly (swearing in Russian) in the bathroom.

"I just found one of the fuckers right on a cinder block!"

"A cinder block?" I asked

"Yeah, why the fuck did we get these if the moths don't care about them?" Wife asks, holding up a cedar ring

--

I didn't correct her.

Sent from my Pixel 4a (5G) using Tapatalk

[liv2ski]

Yeah, but she lets you post her great tits in leather on the internet. Trade-offs man, trade-offs.

Wait what? Tgapp has the hawt Russian wife and he is bitching. Please tell me she isn't a redhead to boot or he can take his complaints elsewhere.

[anotherVTskibum]

My personal favorite is when she shouts from another room about "this", usually while I'm doing something else, and expects an answer. "Well, should we buy this?" "Should we do this next weekend?" "We should have this for dinner!" Etc

Okay, the first one is almost always "no," but knowing what "this" is--which I clearly do not, as she's (as I've learned the few times I am in the same room) pointing to something on her phone or computer, would be rather helpful in providing a meaningful answer.

Sent from my SM-G892A using TGR Forums mobile app

[old goat]

Wait what? Tgapp has the hawt Russian wife and he is bitching. Please tell me she isn't a redhead to boot or he can take his complaints elsewhere.

Russians are only hot until you marry them.

[liv2ski]

To be fair, the guy I know married a hawt Ukrainian mail order bride.

[old goat]

There's nothing fair about it.
And Ukrainian isn't Russian.

[Meadow Skipper]

...And Ukrainian isn't Russian.

...yet.

[Buster Highmen]

My wife is most definitely not stingy with words but I still have to guess what she means or wants.

This^.
My wife has several topics running in her head that she thinks I'm aware of. It's a running joke.

[riser4]

This^.
My wife has several topics running in her head that she thinks I'm aware of. It's a running joke.

Heh.

[Elkhound Odin]

We are going to repaint the entire inside of our condo in a couple weeks. I'm doing the work myself. We survived the argument over which color and got her to agree to paint the ceiling the same color as the walls. (I am NOT going to tape and apply two different colors)
Yesterday she asked what color am I painting the barn door for the laundry closet. We don't have a barn door.
Um, honey, I was willing to build a barn door last year when I was out of work, but you didn't want one. I'm fully employed, and now you want one?!? arrggghhh

[waxman]

...yet.

or again.

I was going to say calling a Ukrainian a Russian will get you smacked in a lot of places...

[tgapp]

told mrs tgapp about this thread - she spent the evening reading back about ten pages before telling me "i should make an account on tgr just to bitch about how you love to leave all the cupboard doors open in the kitchen"

then she saw this

Russians are only hot until you marry them.

and did this:



i can't read Cyrillic but i believe it says "fuck you old goat", or more accurately, "go sit on a dick, old goat"

[skaredshtles]

This thread is now, officially, off-the-hook awesome.

[muted reborn]

Time for Old Goat to write something on his chest in response!

[PB]

Time for Old Goat to write something on his chest in response!

Hah - yeah!!! In Geezer Medical Jargon!
Let's all get in on this - trending

[skaredshtles]

Time for Old Goat to write something on his chest in response!

Perhaps in Yiddish?

[bennymac]

If this thread wasn’t Hall of Fame before it is now

[AK47bp]

I’m both frightened and aroused.


Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

[tgapp]

I’m both frightened and aroused.


Sent from my iPhone using TGR Forums

accurate summary of how I feel about our marriage.

Sent from my Pixel 4a (5G) using Tapatalk