I love my wife and all, but Jesus Hercules Christ...

[Hopeless Sinner]

This thread is on FIRE today. Lol

This has been building up since Friday night!

[warthog]

This thread is on FIRE today. Lol

Normally I just lurk, taking respite in the fact that I am not alone in this world.

The kitchen take really spoke to me today.

Anyone want to talk about how many things your wife bumps into with the car, and how it is your fault for noticing the scratch?

[teletripper]

That’s it! Great spoon.

I’m not allowed to cook so I have to do dishes.

I’m good with this arrangement.


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Same here, but I cook and don't fkn clean and I like this because I'd rather throw the dishes away and buy new ones then do the dishes.

[bennymac]

My wife admittedly cooks pretty well, when she does it. I cook alright too. I prefer when I cook, because cleanup is way easier. I cook something, and while working on the next thing, clean what I just used so I can use it again. Also makes cleanup at the end much easier. When she cooks, she uses as many pots and pans as humanly possible. Done with one pot, and have a second to rinse it and use again? Nope. Set it down next to the sink and grab another one. And then grab another one. And after dinner, say to me, I cooked, you clean. Big kitchen knife used to cut a piece of celery? Into the nasty pot because it's dirty. Or, if I'm lucky, and she tries to clean up, it's biggest pot straight into the dishwasher taking up as much space as possible. Then at cleanup, when I go to do the dishes, I pull it out of the dishwasher, "why are you taking that your of the dishwasher?" So I can clean it, and make room for all the dishes in the dishwasher.


sent from Utah.

Omg yes. We married the same woman. She is a great cook. She will use a 8+ knives to make a simple meal.

I’ll use one cutting knife for 8 ingredients. I’d do it that way even if I wasn’t the person that was gonna have to wash the dishes.

[I Skied Bandini Mountain]

Okay, the two dishwashers is an idea that I can embrace, but let me clue you into a revelation from 30 years ago.

His. And. Her. Garages.

Working at a new cabinet shop thirty years ago, one of my first tasks was going out and punch list a home that had just been completed and moved in to. Nice place, French Provincial, clients were a very gracious and appreciative husband and wife. And it had his and hers garages. At one point I mentioned to the husband that I had noticed this particular arrangement and his eyes lit up and with a big smile said "worth it".

I really want his and hers garages right now. I'm about to lose my mind.

[dannynoonan]

Omg yes. We married the same woman. She is a great cook. She will use a 8+ knives to make a simple meal.

I’ll use one cutting knife for 8 ingredients. I’d do it that way even if I wasn’t the person that was gonna have to wash the dishes.

+3 or whatever, it's like I'm reading me own mind here. And it's always huge shit like cutting boards or pots, not easily loadable items like forks. All to better blow up the countertop space.

[anotherVTskibum]

That’s it! Great spoon.

I’m not allowed to cook so I have to do dishes.

I’m good with this arrangement.


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I'm not allowed to cook, either, because at some point I made the mistake of making small portions (like FDA-spec-ish).

I wish my wife could spend two or three weeks working in a reputable commercial kitchen. Then maybe we could start labeling leftovers in the fridge, with dates even. Or understanding what "clean" or "food safe" means in a health code applicable context. Or cleaning during the process, or checking for ingredients before starting a meal, or figuring out the timing of all components before starting one (usually the quickest part), or hell, getting crazy here, subbing a roughly equivalent ingredient rather than freaking out that we don't have the one listed in the recipe.

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[AK47bp]

I'm not allowed to cook, either, because at some point I made the mistake of making small portions (like FDA-spec-ish).

I wish my wife could spend two or three weeks working in a reputable commercial kitchen. Then maybe we could start labeling leftovers in the fridge, with dates even. Or understanding what "clean" or "food safe" means in a health code applicable context. Or cleaning during the process, or checking for ingredients before starting a meal, or figuring out the timing of all components before starting one (usually the quickest part), or hell, getting crazy here, subbing a roughly equivalent ingredient rather than freaking out that we don't have the one listed in the recipe.

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We do Blue Apron and a few of the others a lot. Never miss an ingredient and no arguing over what meals to make.

And by “we do” I mean she does everything and I eat it.


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[dtown]

I'm not allowed to cook, either, because at some point I made the mistake of making small portions (like FDA-spec-ish).

I wish my wife could spend two or three weeks working in a reputable commercial kitchen. Then maybe we could start labeling leftovers in the fridge, with dates even. Or understanding what "clean" or "food safe" means in a health code applicable context. Or cleaning during the process, or checking for ingredients before starting a meal, or figuring out the timing of all components before starting one (usually the quickest part), or hell, getting crazy here, subbing a roughly equivalent ingredient rather than freaking out that we don't have the one listed in the recipe.

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We must be married to the same person. Also, no matter what it is, everything is always cooked on full heat on the range inevitably burning it.


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[warthog]

Any more, and I think we can just call it a woman thing. You can't say that though, so forget I mentioned it.

She called me out a while back about me asking her to not putting the good knives in the dishwasher, so I told her to GTSMF.
Huh? What do you know? I was right. 1 in a row.

Found my good knife in the dishwasher the other day. One month guys. I'll take it.

[Nobody Famous]

Two dishwashers. Pretty common in high-end kitchens in high-end homes.

The DWs are not typically placed next to each other, usage is usually one for china and utensils and the second one for pots, pans and cookware.

[old goat]

I can only imagine some your wives talking about their Type A OCD husbands.

My cousin has 2 dishwashers but he's a dentist that married money.

[paulster2626]

Two dishwashers. Pretty common in high-end kitchens in high-end homes.

The DWs are not typically placed next to each other, usage is usually one for china and utensils and the second one for pots, pans and cookware.

Look at this guy spending time in high end kitchens!


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[warthog]

I can only imagine some your wives talking about their Type A OCD husbands.

My cousin has 2 dishwashers but he's a dentist that married money.

She asks me to not do something, it usually gets fixed. At least by the 2nd or third mention. Not too much to ask the same.
Is it really that hard to remember to NOT put a $300 knife in the dishwasher?

[Danno]

so I told her to GTSMF.

Go Tell Someone, Mother Fucker?
Get The Super Mad Frittata?
Give Tom Safe Meteor Friends?

[bennymac]

I've mentioned this in here before but my friends have a two drawer dishwasher - so you can be running one drawer and still loading dishes into the other. Not great if you're trying to put big giant pots and pans in there but for everything else it seemed like a good idea - smaller loads done more often.

[XXX-er]

just like " the Dude " is every man or parts of everymans character

there is every woman, we just don't have a suitable name yet or do we ?

[XXX-er]

Go Tell Someone, Mother Fucker?
Get The Super Mad Frittata?
Give Tom Safe Meteor Friends?

i've given up trying figure out the acronyms on TGR and i can't be bothered to make them up just to fuck with people

[warthog]

Google That Shit Motherfucker!!! ©

[warthog]

Although, that time I think she asked Alexa, which was awesome. Listening to that sweet Alexa voice tell my wife I was right seemed to make it even better. As I said, 1 in a row, but a sweet sweet victory that I am sure was short lived.

[riser4]

Ive think Ive said it a few times. I want to a row of fucking dishwashers. I also want a real deal urinal somewhere. And a bathroom that is all tile and waterproof hardware with a drain in the middle so I can literally just stand in the bathroom with a hose and nuke the place, top to bottom. Or throw the kids or dog in there on a macro-wash cycle and not worry about a damn thing.

I think my other kitchen pet peeve is the dishwasher unloading technique. My wife pulls everything out of the dishwasher and put it on the counter immediately above the dishwasher which is immediately below the cabinets most of the dishes go into.

My dad was in an assisted living apartment that had a bathroom like that. I thought it was pretty clever.

[bennymac]

Ive think Ive said it a few times. I want to a row of fucking dishwashers. I also want a real deal urinal somewhere. And a bathroom that is all tile and waterproof hardware with a drain in the middle so I can literally just stand in the bathroom with a hose and nuke the place, top to bottom. Or throw the kids or dog in there on a macro-wash cycle and not worry about a damn thing.

I think my other kitchen pet peeve is the dishwasher unloading technique. My wife pulls everything out of the dishwasher and put it on the counter immediately above the dishwasher which is immediately below the cabinets most of the dishes go into.

Yes! I had the same idea about bathrooms. Just cold steel and tile - you could just blast everything with soap and then a pressure washer anytime it needed cleaning. Heck you could take a flamethrower to it if needed ( Not sure how to protect the TP but I’m sure there’s a solution)

In the military there were urinals in the communal showers so you could walk over and piss instead of doing it next to your buddy’s feet

[Skistack]

So this is timely.

Saturday I install a new vent hood over the range, the little fan in the microwave / vent hood combo was not getting the job done. Let the wife know that this thing can move push alot of air, so you need to crack a window to let in replacement air or it won't work well.

Today (that would be 2 days later), I walk down for dinner and the first floor is filled with smoke (burned spicy sausage!). The vent is on low speed, no window cracked.

[warthog]

So this is timely.

Saturday I install a new vent hood over the range, the little fan in the microwave / vent hood combo was not getting the job done. Let the wife know that this thing can move push alot of air, so you need to crack a window to let in replacement air or it won't work well.

Today (that would be 2 days later), I walk down for dinner and the first floor is filled with smoke (burned spicy sausage!). The vent is on low speed, no window cracked.

So how was it your fault? Cause we know it was.

[plugboots]

And a bathroom that is all tile and waterproof hardware with a drain in the middle so I can literally just stand in the bathroom with a hose and nuke the place, top to bottom. Or throw the kids or dog in there on a macro-wash cycle and not worry about a damn thing.

Autowash.