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  1. #1876
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
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    Last Best City in the Last Best Place
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    3,818
    Quote Originally Posted by Name Redacted View Post
    I've posted this before but, my wife will simultaneously open every window in the house, while complaining about how dusty our house is. It is mind bottling. Next thing you know, there's flies buzzing around and she wonders where they came from.
    Got screens? How are flies getting in?

  2. #1877
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I smell poutine!!!
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    12,844
    Quote Originally Posted by Danno View Post
    Drugs?
    Yes please.

  3. #1878
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    tetons
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    7,358
    Quote Originally Posted by dannynoonan View Post
    She literally has a humidifier, and a dehumidifier, in the same fucking room. Both are running. Can someone explain please.
    this might be the craziest wife post I've ever seen on this forum
    I try to esplain the thoughts of my people here (wives) once in awhile, but this is a crime
    skid luxury

  4. #1879
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Watching over the valley
    Posts
    3,381
    I don't know, she clearly has a passion for air quality. Maybe she should go to hvac trade school. Or maybe just drop hvac funformentals book on her nightstand.

    sent from Utah.
    sigless.

  5. #1880
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    225
    So, I checked with the lady of the house about these dueling humidification processes. The reason provided was, "because it stinks in there" which, I can't really argue with. There was no indication she'd be open to alternatives, so I'm going to have to let this one ride.

  6. #1881
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    United States of Aburdistan
    Posts
    7,112
    There are air purifiers that sense odors and then turn on automatically. Like literally the second you fart, it turns on.

  7. #1882
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
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    12,781
    Quote Originally Posted by dannynoonan View Post
    So, I checked with the lady of the house about these dueling humidification processes. The reason provided was, "because it stinks in there" which, I can't really argue with. There was no indication she'd be open to alternatives, so I'm going to have to let this one ride.
    Yeah, I see no point in pressing it.

    Quote Originally Posted by muted View Post
    There are air purifiers that sense odors and then turn on automatically. Like literally the second you fart, it turns on.
    Link? Asking for a friend.

  8. #1883
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    4,846
    Quote Originally Posted by dannynoonan View Post
    So, I checked with the lady of the house about these dueling humidification processes. The reason provided was, "because it stinks in there" which, I can't really argue with. There was no indication she'd be open to alternatives, so I'm going to have to let this one ride.
    Are these the type of humidifiers that need regular cleaning and new filters? Might be the source of that smell.

    Regardless- the dueling machines may be the best example in this whole thread.

  9. #1884
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Driving around the RFV
    Posts
    7,293
    I hope you used this as an opportunity to suggest she put some stank on it for you.
    I remember a bottomless freedom...

  10. #1885
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    The Other Eagle County
    Posts
    10
    My wife likes to cook and I think her cooking is delicious. When she cooks, she does NOT like to turn the fan on. She says, "It's noisy." As the aroma fills the air, creating a haze, my eyes get irritated, and something occasionally burns... the smoke alarm goes off. Now it's really friggin "Noisy".

    Gosh, I love her though. Especially when she spills something... like kombucha... in our van, splashing on my box of work supplies. Why on earth does she like that disgusting drink? Thanks that felt nice to unload!

  11. #1886
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Shuswap Highlands
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    2,938
    Quote Originally Posted by brown View Post
    My wife likes to cook and I think her cooking is delicious. When she cooks, she does NOT like to turn the fan on. She says, "It's noisy." As the aroma fills the air, creating a haze, my eyes get irritated, and something occasionally burns... the smoke alarm goes off. Now it's really friggin "Noisy".

    Gosh, I love her though. Especially when she spills something... like kombucha... in our van, splashing on my box of work supplies. Why on earth does she like that disgusting drink? Thanks that felt nice to unload!
    8 posts since 2010? Let it all out brother!

  12. #1887
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Posts
    1,675
    Quote Originally Posted by brown View Post
    My wife likes to cook and I think her cooking is delicious. When she cooks, she does NOT like to turn the fan on. She says, "It's noisy." As the aroma fills the air, creating a haze, my eyes get irritated, and something occasionally burns... the smoke alarm goes off. Now it's really friggin "Noisy".

    Gosh, I love her though. Especially when she spills something... like kombucha... in our van, splashing on my box of work supplies. Why on earth does she like that disgusting drink? Thanks that felt nice to unload!
    Ever smell the juice that collects at the bottom of a garbage can? That's what kombucha reminds me of.

  13. #1888
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    9,613
    Quote Originally Posted by yeahman View Post
    Got screens? How are flies getting in?
    Yeah, we've got screens, but not on the back door, which is her favorite one to leave open. Maybe next summer I'll get one of those magnetic doohickey screens but I kinda hate those and don't want to have to put sticky velcro or tacks into the wood.

  14. #1889
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    The Other Eagle County
    Posts
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by BCMtnHound View Post
    8 posts since 2010? Let it all out brother!
    You're right my friend! Here's another. One handed steering. She's a good driver in a straight line, but jeez does not know how to one handed steer. While driving a tight turn, her attempt to one hand steer turns the wheel, lets go of the wheel, vehicle moves, steering wheel unwinds itself, she grabs the wheel, jerks the car, and repeat slowly until the car is pointed in the desired direction. Meanwhile I be like, facepalm.

    Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

  15. #1890
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Last Best City in the Last Best Place
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    3,818
    Speaking of spilled drinks... Nobody in my house really knows how to wipe up a spilled drink. They always halfass it and leave a sticky spot on the floor. My mom taught me at an early age how to wipe up my spills and there was no halfassing allowed. She sure as hell wasn't going to do it for me, but she was happy to make me re-do it as many times as needed.

  16. #1891
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    The Other Eagle County
    Posts
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by char_ View Post
    Ever smell the juice that collects at the bottom of a garbage can? That's what kombucha reminds me of.
    Nailed it!!

    Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

  17. #1892
    Join Date
    Jun 2020
    Location
    in a freezer in Italy
    Posts
    1,641
    I knew we'd eventually come upon a topic that Brown could get interested in and we did it. Took a few pages but we persevered.

  18. #1893
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
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    Posts
    12,781
    Quote Originally Posted by brown View Post
    You're right my friend! Here's another. One handed steering. She's a good driver in a straight line, but jeez does not know how to one handed steer. While driving a tight turn, her attempt to one hand steer turns the wheel, lets go of the wheel, vehicle moves, steering wheel unwinds itself, she grabs the wheel, jerks the car, and repeat slowly until the car is pointed in the desired direction. Meanwhile I be like, facepalm.
    Couldn’t you just hold her beer or blunt or whatever for her?

  19. #1894
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    truckee
    Posts
    15,481
    Quote Originally Posted by XXX-er View Post
    Spring loaded hinges are yer friend as you limp into the old age
    Now think about what you said. As I limp into old age I don't move fast enough to keep the spring loaded door from hitting me in the ass and knocking me down. And then I have to press the button on my Life Alert to get the EMT's to come over to get me up.

  20. #1895
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    4,846
    Quote Originally Posted by brown View Post
    You're right my friend! Here's another. One handed steering. She's a good driver in a straight line, but jeez does not know how to one handed steer. While driving a tight turn, her attempt to one hand steer turns the wheel, lets go of the wheel, vehicle moves, steering wheel unwinds itself, she grabs the wheel, jerks the car, and repeat slowly until the car is pointed in the desired direction. Meanwhile I be like, facepalm.

    Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk
    Oh god yes. One handed steering by my wife will be on my death certificate. Watching a transport truck approaching from the opposite direction on snowy roads while she has one hand on the wheel with her arm fully extended and elbow locked.

  21. #1896
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I smell poutine!!!
    Posts
    12,844
    Quote Originally Posted by Meadow Skipper View Post
    Couldn’t you just hold her beer or blunt or whatever for her?
    He could give himself the handy but where's the fun in that?

  22. #1897
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    Dec 2005
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    Posts
    12,781
    Quote Originally Posted by riser3 View Post
    He could give himself the handy but where's the fun in that?
    Ah, I didn’t think of that.

  23. #1898
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    northern BC
    Posts
    22,155
    Quote Originally Posted by old goat View Post
    Now think about what you said. As I limp into old age I don't move fast enough to keep the spring loaded door from hitting me in the ass and knocking me down. And then I have to press the button on my Life Alert to get the EMT's to come over to get me up.
    ain't the only thing thats limp, at your age the only thing getting stiff anymore is yer back
    Lee Lau - xxx-er is the laziest Asian canuck I know

  24. #1899
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Posts
    346
    Quote Originally Posted by bennymac View Post
    Oh god yes. One handed steering by my wife will be on my death certificate. Watching a transport truck approaching from the opposite direction on snowy roads while she has one hand on the wheel with her arm fully extended and elbow locked.
    I think my wife went to the same driving school...one handed steering woth her coffee cup held up high in the other, heavan forbid a drop gets splashed onto the lid of her mug

    Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

  25. #1900
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Bellevue
    Posts
    5,803
    Quote Originally Posted by riser3 View Post
    He could give himself the handy but where's the fun in that?
    I spent 45 minutes in traffic with a drunk guy in the trunk narrating how the couple behind us was taking turns on each other. With the tint they couldn't see him, and with the coolers in the back he couldn't really move to another position so he decided to share with the rest of us in the car. It was supposed to be 5-10 minute drive.

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