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06-11-2014, 11:47 PM #1Good-lookin' wool
- Join Date
- Oct 2005
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- 11,762
Reviews of movies my wife makes me watch
August: Osage County
Anytime there is a month in the title, you can bet the movie is going smell like a bouquet of dongs.
I think someone forgot that movies should have plots. Good acting though.
I bet Weinstein figured he had a creative alibi if he crammed this thing with 2 hours of yelling and shots of the Oklahoma plains. It's not that we don't get it Harvey, it's that the only thing more boring than being in Oklahoma is watching a movie about Dermot Mulroney being in Oklahoma.
She changed the netflix account password and now I don't know what it is. There will probably be more to come.
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06-12-2014, 12:25 AM #2
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06-12-2014, 12:48 AM #3
Maybe one day Stuck will get a real, live Girlfriend and be able to relate to this sure to become epic thread.
Until that day comes: keep on -passing in the breakdown lane- keeping on.....
(I use to have to watch 'The Bachelorette'. NEVER. AGAIN.)
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06-12-2014, 08:18 AM #4
My ex made me watch Sex in the City. She wouldn't believe me when I told her it was created and written by gay guys.
Not movies, but, the worst was being dragged to a Bonnie Raite / Jackson Brown concert by her. Then dumbass Benny made it five times worse by getting stoned out in the parking lot before. shudder. I am scarred for life.
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06-12-2014, 09:17 AM #5
Bonnie Raitt is awesome. Jackson Browne not so much.
This thread topic is why we have 2 TVs in the house. My wife loves... LOVES Nashville. I'd rather dig my eyes out with a grapefruit spoon than watch that crap. With my own TV in the man-cave i don't have to, and she's not inundated with sports, GoT, or Robot Chicken/South Park/etc.
The only shows we watch together during the week are Stewart/Colbert or Jeopardy, and that's only occasionally. Breakfast and watching CBS Sunday Morning is a weekend ritual for us before heading outside or working on the to-do list.
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06-12-2014, 03:46 PM #6
OK. I'm going to do the manly thing and not post this under an alias.
the wife got into...parenthood tv show....and i started out watching it with her just to ridicule her, and I wound up liking it. God I feel dirty saying that."Can't you see..."
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06-12-2014, 03:53 PM #7
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06-12-2014, 05:56 PM #8
In for the soon to be HOF thread.
Can't wait for the Bridget Jones reviews.
Or anything by Nicolas Sparks.
Or anything that involves sisters and traveling pants.
Or chick cancer. Fucking chick cancer is the worst.
http://cryingwife.com/
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06-12-2014, 06:56 PM #9
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06-12-2014, 09:24 PM #10
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06-12-2014, 09:41 PM #11
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06-12-2014, 09:43 PM #12
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06-12-2014, 10:12 PM #13
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06-12-2014, 11:29 PM #14
My wife made me watch the Time Traveler's Wife. She had read the book, so wanted to see the movie. I checked RT and saw 37% and protested. She made me watch it anyway. When it was over she said, "Yeah. That was a piece of shit."
I used to have to watch The Bachelor/ette. Thank God she's grown out of that.
She watches Mad Men and various other HBO/Showtime shows with me, so that's cool. No GOT though, unfortunately.
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06-12-2014, 11:34 PM #15
Across the universe. And she sang along with it.
I need to go to Utah.
Utah?
Yeah, Utah. It's wedged in between Wyoming and Nevada. You've seen pictures of it, right?
So after 15 years we finally made it to Utah.....
Thanks BCSAR and POWMOW Ski Patrol for rescues
8, 17, 13, 18, 16, 18, 20, 19, 16, 24, 32, 35
2021/2022 (13/15)
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06-13-2014, 07:34 AM #16
For years my wife has "made" me go with her to see all of the movies that are nominated for an Academy Award for Best Picture. Of all the movies I've seen I can probably count on one finger those that I thought would suck but didn't. I think she would agree with me on that though. Chick flicks don't usually get nominated but a lot of just plain shitty movies do. One that stands out is "Black Swan". We were the only 2 in the theater (can't imagine why) and it was like "Mystery Science Theater 2000". What an unbelievable piece of shit. (except for the lesbian scene)
The Sheriff is near!
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06-13-2014, 09:32 AM #17
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06-13-2014, 08:01 PM #18
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06-13-2014, 08:40 PM #19
Hayden photographs better than she films. But you two are still old as fuck.
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06-14-2014, 06:48 AM #20
Loaded up the family truckster yesterday for a 6 hour road trip. Started a movie for the kids and my wife tells me she forgot her head phones and wants to listen to a book through the radio.......
Nicholas Sparks - The Last Song
If my kids weren't in the car I would have turned into a wall to end the pain.
At least you can check out some hot chicks with a movie.....instead of just listening to a dude talk about crappy stuff
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06-17-2014, 02:50 PM #21
Wife made me watch couple of her "chick flicks". I suffered with my stiff upper lip, like a man does.
After the third flick, Marie Antoinette I think, I made her watch Antonionis Red Desert and Space Odyssey 2001.
Carte blanche after that.
"You want to watch...ewwmmm...never mind.."
"What?"
The floggings will continue until morale improves.
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06-17-2014, 03:01 PM #22
DVTbjWFxgyxtgtjotc bx
'Least I ain't chicken.
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07-03-2014, 01:59 PM #23Good-lookin' wool
- Join Date
- Oct 2005
- Posts
- 11,762
The Time Traveler's Wife
With a decent run of non rod-cringing netflix movies the past few weeks, this one shows up AGAIN. Opt out clause in effect due to previous viewing precedent? Nope, trial de novo.
On to the pre-showing review, which I am sure mirrors my sentiments last time I watched this. Some creepy dude meets a little girl and thinks she is hot and wants to have sex with her. So, in order to avoid statutory rape charges, he travels to the future, a magical time where age of consent is no longer an issue, and he nails her. They actually get married in order for the creepy dude to legitimize his perversion, but rather than hanging out with her in the future, he travels back in time to stalk her as a little girl some more.
This movie was probably supposed to be about the timelessness of love - an oft-used romantic movie concept that usually sees the main characters devoted to each other as they get OLDER. Some genius thought that turning the clock back was a fresh take but apparently failed to see how rapey this all seems.
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07-09-2014, 02:50 AM #24
I've seen "The Time Travelers Wife" come up enough times in discussions of terrible movies to pique my curiosity. So I asked my girlfriend. She said the book was really romantic but the movie totally missed the mark, was a disappointment and ruined the book for her (rapeyness). I convinced her watch "Apocalypse Now" with me last night, as a 10/10 movie baseline but she fell asleep.
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07-09-2014, 09:47 AM #25
I'm with Tip on this but, I'm old as fuck.
As for bad chick movies, I was forced to watch My Best Friend's Wedding and a couple others, which titles I've conveniently forgotten and drew the line. No more. She wants to watch that crap, she does it on days/nights I'm gone or doing something upstairs or outside.
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