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  1. #876
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
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    truckee
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    10,823
    Uncoiling a 3/4 in bandsaw blade when you forgot your gloves is fun. I just kind of tossed it out in front of me, but it still got me on the arm, not too bad. I did manage to coil the old one without hurting myself, but it was really dull.

  2. #877
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
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    here and there
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    14,845
    watch out for snakes

  3. #878
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    Jan 2008
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    truckee
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    10,823
    Woman calls police because she's frightened of the turtle on her doorstep. #turtlelivesmatter #walkingwhilegreen
    http://digital.olivesoftware.com/Oli...281E&mode=text

  4. #879
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I smell poutine!!!
    Posts
    8,280
    Fap is a valid Words with Friends word.

  5. #880
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I smell poutine!!!
    Posts
    8,280
    My middle kid is cooking dinner and the smoke alarm started off at about the same time I heard an "oh shit."

  6. #881
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Location
    In a van... down by the river
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    3,914
    Quote Originally Posted by riser3 View Post
    My middle kid is cooking dinner and the smoke alarm started off at about the same time I heard an "oh shit."
    Turned on the stove, got distracted by the phone? That's usually how it works around here...

  7. #882
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I smell poutine!!!
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    8,280
    Quote Originally Posted by skaredshtles View Post
    Turned on the stove, got distracted by the phone? That's usually how it works around here...
    No, he likes to cook. He pays attention. And I let him cook because it's usually pretty good. I not going to look right now. The smoke alarm stopped and the house doesn't appear to be on fire. No fire trucks.

  8. #883
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
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    In a van... down by the river
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    Quote Originally Posted by riser3 View Post
    No, he likes to cook. He pays attention. And I let him cook because it's usually pretty good. I not going to look right now. The smoke alarm stopped and the house doesn't appear to be on fire. No fire trucks.
    At least he acknowledged there was a problem...

  9. #884
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    Dec 2012
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    I smell poutine!!!
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    Quote Originally Posted by skaredshtles View Post
    At least he acknowledged there was a problem...
    Heh.

  10. #885
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    Dec 2008
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    5,131
    heh heh

  11. #886
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    Jan 2008
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    4,926
    Saw someone rocking this shirt today.
    I chuckled.

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  12. #887
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    on the edge
    Posts
    5,806

    what amuses you?

    Played a summer league hockey game against group of 18-20 yr olds from our area's version of Greenwich, CT.

    A couple of them were off the charts pieces of shit, begging for a life long breathing issue.

    The worst of the bunch got me to the point of threatening his life. Fake tough guy, smirking at me as he backs away from me trying to grab him...prototypical behavior from these types

    I just found out his name is Heyden. Ha!...I'm dying
    If it's green, smoke it...if it's pink, poke it

    BUY THESE------> 193 iM 103 - $50 https://www.tetongravity.com/forums/s...d.php?t=179797

  13. #888
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
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    In a van... down by the river
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    Summer league hockey.


  14. #889
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    Nov 2006
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    on the edge
    Posts
    5,806

    what amuses you?

    Quote Originally Posted by skaredshtles View Post
    Summer league hockey.

    Ha it's a fucking joke. That's why it's annoying when some closet gay frat boy tries to take your feet out from behind, then runs and hides when you confront her.

    I usually don't skate in the summer but I was feeling like a pile of shit so I joined my buddy's squad. Regretted my decision after the 2nd game...league is brutal
    If it's green, smoke it...if it's pink, poke it

    BUY THESE------> 193 iM 103 - $50 https://www.tetongravity.com/forums/s...d.php?t=179797

  15. #890
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
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    SLC
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    949
    This belongs equally in the shit that annoys you thread but the conclusion made me laugh so hard I'm putting it here... TLDR warning in effect.

    Earlier this week I was blissfully cruising along a deserted Wasatch Crest trail (mid afternoon on a weekday) , came around a blind corner, and almost shoved a 29" wheel up the spandexed ass of some XC-race guy planted off his bike mid-trail. I stared at him for a solid 3 seconds before asking if he was OK since, you know, standing in blind corners is rather bad form and risky for everyone. He angrily explained that he was waiting for his wife and teenage kid to clear a rooty uphill and that there would be no need for me to pass them since "the three of us are, like, really fast".
    He must have read my thoughts (namely that fast people don't stop and pick their way through these 15' of roots, they haul ass around the corner and air the whole thing) because he jumped on his bike and angrily attacked the roots, barely dodging his poor wife who was finishing the section, and yelling at his kid to go go go already. I heard her say "Jerry, not again" then she pulled off to the side and let me ride by, shrugging her shoulders with an apologetic look on her face. Interesting...

    I proceeded to follow Jerry and Jerry Jr into the next downhill section and they quickly confirmed my suspicion: they weren't, like, really fast. Jerry was going after it though, getting seriously loose on his XC rig, looking back every 15 seconds to evaluate the gap, and Jerry Jr was bravely following along bouncing off every rock and root he could find. We came to a flat section and Jerry put the hammer down, getting out of the saddle and nearly dropping Jerry Jr and I. He looked back and literally screamed at Jr to keep up (ALLEZ SON, ALLEZ ALLEZ - saying it in French increases your wattage by 10% at least). Jerry Jr was not about to let dad take off (and deal with the resulting flogging for dishonoring the family) and rallied after him. They both attacked the next uphill like a couple of Nino Schurters but the pace dropped dramatically after about 100' and we were again in danger of getting passed by fast hikers. Jerry was still keeping an eye on me (whenever he stopped looking at his power-meter that is) and I realized there would be no passing this dude in a civil manner, he was out for blood and nobody was going to out-Strava him on this particular segment, even if it took riding his kid into the ground.

    Fortunately Jr was redlining hard by then and used his joker: he pointed out that he couldn't see SheJerry back there and "dad you know how mad she gets when you leave her behind like that". Jerry took one last look behind him, let out a string of fucks that really impressed me considering how winded he was, and pulled up on the side. He didn't stop though, he continued riding diagonally in the brush and, right as I went by and thanked him/wished him a good ride, he rode through a fat patch of brush and laid himself flat into it. I heard some screaming and obscenities and looked back to see a red-faced Jr looking half-terrified half-embarrassed next to an irate Jerry all tangled up in brush shaking his fist and calling me a fucking asshole.

    I was still giggling when I got back to the car over an hour later.

    Note: it's possible I misheard dude's first name, it may have been Johnny. Or Bobby. Or Arthur. Jerry fits better though.

  16. #891
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
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    Wet and Mild
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    4,676
    Definitely someone who posts here.
    Set my compass North, I got Winter in my blood.

  17. #892
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
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    here and there
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    14,845
    Jerry of the bomber trail
    watch out for snakes

  18. #893
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    Jan 2009
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    SLC
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    949
    Quote Originally Posted by glademaster View Post
    Definitely someone who posts here.
    Nah, everyone who posts here SHREDS!!

    But really, I hope they let up on their kid and wife a bit. Can't imagine I'd want to keep riding if that shit happens regularly...

  19. #894
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Location
    In a van... down by the river
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boissal View Post
    <snip>

    Note: it's possible I misheard dude's first name, it may have been Johnny. Or Bobby. Or Arthur. Jerry fits better though.
    He could probably smell that you were French.

    Can't be allowing that to happen. Not to a Frenchman.


  20. #895
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    SLC
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    949
    Quote Originally Posted by skaredshtles View Post
    He could probably smell that you were French.

    Can't be allowing that to happen. Not to a Frenchman.

    ZING!

    Family related amusement: my FIL has chronic anxiety when it comes to grilling. He's 100% convinced that he ruins everything he puts on the grill. Meat, fish, veggies, you name it, he always tells us to prepare for eating charcoal. He tends to overcooks most things a bit but it's never been bad enough for me to even think of not eating it. The weird thing is that he systematically refuses help with grilling. His daughters both married Euro meataterians, one of which (not me) runs a food truck and is a serious cook. He's only allowed next to the grill to witness the anxiety and offer advice to be ignored.
    For his birthday this year we got him a bluetooth BBQ probe that shows him the temperature of what he's cooking in real time on his phone. He's a major tech nerd so we thought it would solve the problem. Wrong: yesterday we watched him carefully monitor the cooking of a bunch of ribeye, agonizing the whole time about getting it right (we all asked for rare). The phone app shows a colored temperature dial labelled with doneness and he still managed to leave the meat on the grill until it reached 160, ie well-done, ie shoe-leather texture. Then he got mad at himself for ruining it. Sigh...

    Ms Boissal gave him an old Garmin heart rate monitor since he's trying to get in better shape. She thought it would help him if he could geek out on numbers after a workout. Yesterday he announced that after an extensive medical literature search (read: after making up a number) he had decided that he could never exceed 120 bpm heart rate. Apparently it forces him to stop every couple hundred feet when he hikes, driving his wife absolutely insane.

    I bet the Garmin mysteriously disappears within a month, along with the BBQ probe.

  21. #896
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    my own little world
    Posts
    2,390

    what amuses you?

    My 13yo walked to the park a couple blocks over to meet up with some friends who happened to be in the neighborhood. Not a frequent thing, though not improbable. Sheís a good kid and her friends seem fine, so I didnít really doubt her, but I waited 15 minutes and rode my bike over there to make sure everything was good.

    Itís amazing Iím even allowed to wake up every morning, Iím so impossibly boring and stupid and embarrassing.
    focus.

  22. #897
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Location
    In a van... down by the river
    Posts
    3,914
    Quote Originally Posted by Boissal View Post
    <snip> cooking of a bunch of ribeye

    managed to leave the meat on the grill until it reached 160
    Good GOD, man. Hit him over the head with a blunt object. Not too hard - just enough to put him out long enough to pull the ribeyes off the grill when they get to 110F.

    Either that or when the probe hits 115F start screaming hysterically, "YOU GOTTA GET THE MEAT OFF... NOW, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!!!"


  23. #898
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    I smell poutine!!!
    Posts
    8,280
    Uhuhuh, he said probe, huhuhuhuh

  24. #899
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    truckee
    Posts
    10,823
    Saw a 50 something guy at the ice cream place today wearing a Groucho mask. I thought that's pretty weird. Then I looked closer. It was his real face. Poor guy.

  25. #900
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    50 miles E of Paradise
    Posts
    8,381
    Quote Originally Posted by Mustonen View Post
    My 13yo walked to the park a couple blocks over to meet up with some friends who happened to be in the neighborhood. Not a frequent thing, though not improbable. She’s a good kid and her friends seem fine, so I didn’t really doubt her, but I waited 15 minutes and rode my bike over there to make sure everything was good.

    It’s amazing I’m even allowed to wake up every morning, I’m so impossibly boring and stupid and embarrassing.
    You are in just in your Stupid Phase. Mine started when my daughter was 12. I recovered about six months after she moved out at 18.
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