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  1. 10-21-2013, 06:06 PM #1
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    IVplay
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    Calling all tgr sex gods

    Not going to dance around the bush here(heh) so here are the facts:
    I have been dating her for 2 months, and we were good friends before.
    I can tell shes ready for the teh next level (oral)

    So a few questions:

    Do I shave/trim/leave my pewbs?
    Do I wear a condom?

    Thanks
    "4ply is so quiche"
    -Flowing Alpy
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  2. 10-21-2013, 06:09 PM #2
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    Living vicariously through myself.
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  3. 10-21-2013, 06:13 PM #3
    Hugh Conway Guest
    A 50 year old pretending to be a 14 year old asking sex advice from other 50 year olds who act 14.

    Thank god there aren't avantlinks
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  4. 10-21-2013, 06:17 PM #4
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    liv2ski
    liv2ski is online now Last Survivor of the NPG
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    Shouldn't this be posted in the "Shit that bugs you" thread?
    Quote Originally Posted by leroy jenkins View Post
    I think you'd have an easier time understanding people if you remembered that 80% of them are fucking morons.
    That is why I like dogs, more than most people.
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  5. 10-21-2013, 06:22 PM #5
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    1. If she's right handed, shave your right half. You don't want to lose the pubes on the left as her hand is coming in from that side and you need protection from the friction if she rests her wrist. Smooth on the other side though so she doesn't get tickled and sneeze, thus unmanning you further.

    2. Wear one on the day leading up to the potential chance. Take it off when it's go time. This keeps the dust off so you'll stay at your most appealing.
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  6. 10-21-2013, 06:32 PM #6
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    Spice things up a bit by making a generous application of Gold Bond (green bottle of course) in the morning on the day you're planning this tryst.
    Brandine: Now Cletus, if I catch you with pig lipstick on your collar one more time you ain't gonna be allowed to sleep in the barn no more!
    Cletus: Duly noted.
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  7. 10-21-2013, 07:12 PM #7
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    Two months of dating, and no oral? Just what the hell do you consider "dating"?
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  8. 10-21-2013, 07:26 PM #8
    Hugh Conway Guest
    how does rosie give you oral?
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  9. 10-21-2013, 07:36 PM #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flyoverland Captive View Post
    Two months of dating, and no oral? Just what the hell do you consider "dating"?
    And his name is foreplay.


    Disclaimer: I am not a sex god, but this thread has comedy potential.
    Silent....but shredly.
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  10. 10-21-2013, 08:25 PM #10
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    Sent from my SCH-I545 using TGR Forums
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  11. 10-21-2013, 08:36 PM #11
    splat
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    No rubber needed, just do a thorough rub down with Tiger Balm before you stick it in your hand.
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  12. 10-21-2013, 08:40 PM #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hugh Conway View Post
    how does rosie give you oral?
    “I have a responsibility to not be intimidated and bullied by low life losers who abuse what little power is granted to them as ski patrollers.”
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  13. 10-21-2013, 08:56 PM #13
    Hugh Conway Guest
    You could drive commonlaw's forester into that thing
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  14. 10-21-2013, 09:26 PM #14
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    Definitely wear a condom, get the kind with spermicide.
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  15. 10-21-2013, 09:33 PM #15
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    Forget the condom - you need to wear oven mitts and a Fedora. Better safe than sorry.
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  16. 10-21-2013, 09:40 PM #16
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    Saw the call in the thread title. Just checking in.
    A few people feel the rain. Most people just get wet.
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  17. 10-21-2013, 09:41 PM #17
    Hugh Conway Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Tippster View Post
    Forget the condom - you need to wear oven mitts and a Fedora.
    Is he fisting rontele?
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  18. 10-21-2013, 09:41 PM #18
    Zedsdead
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    16 posts and no 'der poopenhausen?'

    'cause that's not like real sex, you know?
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  19. 10-21-2013, 09:43 PM #19
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    Those jokes are about as good as stevie wonder trying to hit a baseball.
    "4ply is so quiche"
    -Flowing Alpy
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  20. 10-21-2013, 09:44 PM #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moeghoul View Post
    And his name is foreplay.


    Disclaimer: I am not a sex god, but this thread has comedy potential.
    You know, this whole time I've been imagining his name as IV play (eye vee play). This new info makes him seem way more vanilla...
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  21. 10-21-2013, 09:44 PM #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by IVplay View Post
    Those jokes are about as good as stevie wonder trying to hit a baseball.
    Which, to be clear, would be pretty hilarious.
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  22. 10-21-2013, 09:45 PM #22
    splat
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    Quote Originally Posted by IVplay View Post
    Those jokes are about as good as stevie wonder trying to hit a baseball.
    Have you seen stevie wonders new album?
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  23. 10-21-2013, 09:45 PM #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hugh Conway View Post
    Is he fisting rontele?
    For that he would need loafers and an Ascot.
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  24. 10-21-2013, 10:15 PM #24
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    Paging Dr. REV, Dr. Rev to the courtesy phone.
    watch out for snakes
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  25. 10-21-2013, 10:19 PM #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by scottyb View Post
    Paging Dr. REV, Dr. Rev to the courtesy phone.
    "...pull out and say, 'That's the droid you're looking for!'"

    Still the best internet forum post of all time.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ernest_Hemingway View Post
    I realize there is not much hope for a bullfighting forum. I understand that most of you would prefer to discuss the ingredients of jacket fabrics than the ingredients of a brave man. I know nothing of the former. But the latter is made of courage, and skill, and grace in the presence of the possibility of death. If someone could make a jacket of those three things it would no doubt be the most popular and prized item in all of your closets.
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