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Thread: HOA's

  1. #1
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    HOA's

    Are they really that fcked up?

    I don't have one thankfully, nor do i have "that neighbor" in my pimpy non hoa area, thankfully again, but several friends won't stfu about them. All sorts of odd demerits and incidental fines for what i see as being beyond petty bullshit. Not sure i could even handle the idiocy. What's the collective view?

  2. #2
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    Some aren't bad, some are. Some people like the security they provide (won't have a car on blocks in the neighbor's yard), others hate the restrictions on property freedom they impose.

    You choose to buy into them, so it really is caveat emptor.
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "I'd eat a bag of Dicks and wash it down with a Coke any day." - iceman

  3. #3
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    I used to practice HOA law and saw some serious shitshows. They are like small countries distilled into one building. But really depends upon your neighbors. If they understand that they are giving up some personal liberties in exchange for some benefits of community living, could be just fine. It's the folks who don't understand the former and take the latter for granted that cause probs.

  4. #4
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    I can see their value in a lot of situations, though I could never really accept the extra $100+ added to my monthly mortgage payment. The ones I really don't understand are the $50-100/quarter ones that don't seem to provide much of anything.

    I live in an old, HOA-free neighborhood, and there's a guy two doors down that works on cars that is sort of the epitome of why HOAs were created. It's a nice neighborhood with really good folks, and we're not going anywhere anytime soon, so it doesn't really bother me. He's also a pro with small engines and charges pennies, if anything.
    Remind me. We'll send him a red cap and a Speedo.

  5. #5
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    As I explain it to my clients, when buying into an HOA you are going into business with partner's you can't choose. The concept isn't broken, but HOA boards tend to attract every busy body that is still pissed they weren't popular in high school and lost the junior class treasurer election.

  6. #6
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    HOAs and the people they were created to combat are the reason I refuse to buy a house with visible neighbors, on less than 2 acres of land or in anything resembling a subdivision. Fuck that noise.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tunco perfectly summarizing TGR View Post
    It is like Days of Our Lives', but with retards.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Foggy_Goggles View Post
    As I explain it to my clients, when buying into an HOA you are going into business with partner's you can't choose. The concept isn't broken, but HOA boards tend to attract every busy body that is still pissed they weren't popular in high school and lost the junior class treasurer election.
    I take exception to that derogatory statement. I'm on my HOA board and I never ran for class treasurer.

    It's pretty simple: You buy into a community with rules, you need to abide by them. You don't like rules, live somewhere else. Things only get out of control when unreasonable & irrational people conflict with each other.

    Or, you can deal with the situation in Brighton where the neighbor put a big sign clearly visible from the house for sale next door that warns potential buyers that he has 3 Rottweilers, plays loud music, has loud parties, has loud cars, hates horses, and shoots off fireworks.

  8. #8
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  9. #9
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    I bought a condo back in 2004, the first "home" I owned. A couple months later a two of the old dudes asked me to be on the board with them. We were going to replace the current board members. So I said OK, we had our annual meeting and were voted in. One year down the road and they were going at it like a couple of 12 year olds. I swear one guy was losing his marbles, had good days and bad. But he mostly just festered over his email couped up in his condo, constantly stirring up shit for lack of a better things to do.

    So one day the festering guy is out walking his dog on our mile-long private dirt road. The other board member, who is a weekender, comes tearing up the road in his SUV. At this point, they aren't even talking to each other. Crazy guy starts flapping his arms to get him to slow down. Instinctively, he floors it and tears past the guy leaving him a couple feet of road to get out of the way. Festering guys promptly marches home and reports it to the state police. Nothing ever became of it other than a really personal throw down over email with all of the owners CC'd on it. Needless to say it was a complete shit-show from there on out.

    So yes, they can be really that fucked up.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Foggy_Goggles View Post
    As I explain it to my clients, when buying into an HOA you are going into business with partner's you can't choose. The concept isn't broken, but HOA boards tend to attract every busy body that is still pissed they weren't popular in high school and lost the junior class treasurer election.
    Or more to the point, the one's that really strive to be in charge are exactly the one's that shouldn't be. I theorize it's because in their work place people recognize that and keep them under control but they really want to be large and in charge of something or everything. That and retired bigshots with way too much time on their hands just dying to fill that time by spending (misspending) someone else's money.

    The retired guy/time on the hands concept seems to be captured well above.
    Last edited by L7; 09-24-2011 at 11:45 PM.
    It's not so much the model year, it's the high mileage or meterage to keep the youth of Canada happy

  11. #11
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    My landlord had to get an approval to change the landscaping on her lot. That pisses me off. I'm not going to have to go ask someone what I can do on my own damn property. If you can't tell I would be a horrible HOA participant. In fact I'd probably fill my yard with those tacky pink flamingos just to watch the hilarity that would ensue.

  12. #12
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    My pop up camper sat outside my house (unopened) for a day and a half while I was working on the wiring. I had received two emails and the president of the HOA stopped by to let me know that I couldn't store it outside. WTF? I'm working on it. I understand that we don't want everyone storing their boats and rvs in front of their house and all but this was a day and a half!

    Other than the petty BS though, they do serve a purpose. I don't have to shovel snow in the winter and our roads are super well maintained. Sure is nice to not have to mow the lawn or any of the other maintenance shit, leaves more time for fun stuff.

  13. #13
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    Me and 183_Gotama-A/T or whatever his handle is have what i think is the best of both worlds. We do have an HOA, and a few covenants, not supposed to have all kinds of shit laying around, 1200 sf minimum, need to plant grass and trees [a rule from when it was being built up, but there's still a few undeveloped lots], no businesses, leash law, invasive plant species, etc. But nobody really has felt a need to step up to enforce. There's one house that's a bit of a shitshow, and one guy parks a backhoe in his drive, but will help anybody out plowing.

    The fee is $120/year, and it has $35k+ in the bank. Town plows the roads and takes care of the park. But the whole sub is plumbed with irrigation water, every back yard has a spigot, free creek water from mid june to mid sept for irrigating. Hence we have some sweet lawns and landscaping. If/when that has to be replaced, it will eat up a lot of that balance.

    They usually have the meeting in October, although they missed last year. I'll be there if if they ask for any help on it i won't be opposed to pitching in...
    Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
    And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
    It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
    and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.

    Patterson Hood of the DBT's

  14. #14
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    Bumping thread because I am fighting with my HOA over the desired placement of a fence/dog run. CC&R clearly discourage perimeter fencing, but has specific language allowing non perimeter fencing and offers specific guidelines. However, it also states that all fencing must be approved by board before placement. My HOA board says that it will not allow me to place any type fencing/dog run, and won't give me a reason why, or respond to my requests to advise of their interpretation of the fencing language. While I am happy to arbitrate with them over this, my HOA is poorly run and has basically $0 in their reserve account for the costs associated with arbitration. I think that they just want me to be "a good, friendly neighbor" and cave. That is not in my nature. 15 years ago I would have eaten these fuckers for brunch.
    “A society that puts equality before freedom will get neither. A society that puts freedom before equality will get a high degree of both.”
    ― Milton Friedman

  15. #15
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    I'm not comfortable with any additional requirements any HOA would place beyond city ordinances. Might be kinda nice to have a neighborhood pool I didn't have to personally maintain.. But definitely not worth any of this type of bullshit. I don't care that my neighbor runs a mom and pop auto repair shop in his front yard. They don't care that I have a skateboard mini ramp beside my house or that we park a 4th car in the middle of our yard on a grave patch. Our property values are still exploding in this gentrification age. I much prefer that everybody here minds their own god damned business unless it's matter that warrants calling the police.. HOAs are for people who can't mind their own business..
    Go that way really REALLY fast. If something gets in your way, TURN!

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by schindlerpiste View Post
    Bumping thread because I am fighting with my HOA over the desired placement of a fence/dog run. CC&R clearly discourage perimeter fencing, but has specific language allowing non perimeter fencing and offers specific guidelines. However, it also states that all fencing must be approved by board before placement. My HOA board says that it will not allow me to place any type fencing/dog run, and won't give me a reason why, or respond to my requests to advise of their interpretation of the fencing language. While I am happy to arbitrate with them over this, my HOA is poorly run and has basically $0 in their reserve account for the costs associated with arbitration. I think that they just want me to be "a good, friendly neighbor" and cave. That is not in my nature. 15 years ago I would have eaten these fuckers for brunch.
    Got a lawyer friend who can write 'em a letter insinuating expensive consequences if they refuse to approve some kind of dog run per the CC&R's?

  17. #17
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    I hate HOA's. If you're buying a 2nd home you will rarely be at, maybe, but you still have the potential fall out of rookies on the board not understanding a balance sheet and not keeping the dues high enough to pay for major expenses down the road and BAM, $50k special assessment for something they should of planned for 20 years ago and you have lived there 2 years and take a ramming with no lube. Fuck that.
    Quote Originally Posted by leroy jenkins View Post
    I think you'd have an easier time understanding people if you remembered that 80% of them are fucking morons.
    That is why I like dogs, more than most people.

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by liv2ski View Post
    $50k special assessment for something they should of planned for 20 years ago and you have lived there 2 years and take a ramming with no lube. Fuck that.
    Bingo. The special assessments can be ridiculous. Our first place was a townhouse that we were in for about 3 years. I can remember a few assessments. Once, they were going to put gutters on all of the buildings, but they didn't do our building because they couldn't put the downspouts on the side and they would have to drain into the parking area which would make an impressive ice rink. I got fucked on that one.

    Then there was the replacement of the decks that were perfectly fine. Fucked there too.

    Another time they wanted $400 so they could install a new front door. There was nothing wrong with my door so I asked why. They said they were replacing all of the doors with ones with windows. My door already had a window. They let me opt out of that one after considerable bitching.

    Not assessment related, but I got a letter one day stating that the HOA needed a key to my place "in case of emergency." I told them they can have a key to my place when I get a key to my neighbor's place which had my water shutoff in the crawl space. Until then, they had my permission to bust my door down in an emergency. Never heard back about that one.

    Then there was the time I heard people up in the attic nailing my access closed. Pretty sure they were trying to hide the fact that there was no fire separation between attic spaces.

    HOA dues went up $25 every year consistently, but reserves never increased.

    They've gotten new roofs on the buildings since we left and just painted the exteriors this past summer. I feel for those poor bastards.

  19. #19
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    I've only ever belonged to one, at our condo, and it's been awesome. They've totally been on it as far as the condition of the building and reserves and all that but they've been transparent otherwise. Just lucky I guess but they're definitely not all bad.

  20. #20
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    Aaahhhh. Ours is voluntary. Keeps the pool And tennis courts up. Plus We had some truly epic band parties, ex treasurer and later tennis committee

  21. #21
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    Feb 2012
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    Fuck a HOA. Nobody's going to tell me where I'm allowed to park my car on my driveway, what color my house numbers have to be, and what flowers I can grow. Fuck that right off.

  22. #22
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    I strongly dislike HOAs.

    But I very much like that I (and a few nearby neighbors) do not live in an HOA, yet the majority of the neighborhood around us is all in HOA land.
    Quote Originally Posted by powder11 View Post
    if you have to resort to taking advice from the nitwits on this forum, then you're doomed.

  23. #23
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    Basketball hoops can be frowned upon too by HOAs around here. Neighbors telling other neighbors what they can or can't do beyond what's legal or not is total bullshit.

    Chipping in on a pool or other shared facilities is fine.. but bullshit community standards beyond city zoning, noise, building codes etc is just busybodies on a power trip.
    Go that way really REALLY fast. If something gets in your way, TURN!

  24. #24
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    Our's is well run, by full time professionals w owners on the board of directors. They supply 2 pools, hot tubs, all the tennis, and pickleball courts you want for $700/yr. Any work or new homes has to be run through the association's architectural review so folks don't ruin it for each other. It's a pain storing boats, and rv's etc but other than that it's been good. 5 mins to the lift and 5 mins to golf easily over comes the lack of storage.

  25. #25
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    We've got a really nice pool and plenty of tennis courts within a mile of our front door.. Tennis courts and pickleball are free and rarely all taken, pool is $2. No way I'm sharing a hot tub with neighbors/unwashed masses. Had one for 10 years.. Might get another one, might not.
    Go that way really REALLY fast. If something gets in your way, TURN!

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