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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    i'm really trying to start yoga...but...

    its so phucking hard! and the stupid videos my wife bought are enough to make me shoot myself! the 'soothing' background music and the womens voices drive me nuts! doesn't anyone have fun doing this stuff!? i get that its supposed to be relaxing and all, but i need some energy and funness (< wtf...that isn't word?) in order to be relaxed. the other part is the flexability. jeezus! i can't bend like that! the only flexibilty i have is in my legs from stretching after running, biking, and skiing all these years and shit that isn't even all that great. maybe is should just get drunk...that'll loosen me up.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
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    My advice is:

    Post nekked pics of wife, then we can offer advice.
    Quote Originally Posted by Socialist View Post
    They have socalized healthcare up in canada. The whole country is 100% full of pot smoking pro-athlete alcoholics.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
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    One idea is to hit a few classes so you get some instruction on the basics. With any luck you'll find one that's fun and full of hotties. The results take time, but will always happen if you practice. I took my first class seven months ago, and average 3 classes/week, have hit four workshops, and one retreat. Yeah, i'm hooked, but i was lucky to have stumbled into an awesome studio...
    Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
    And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
    It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
    and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.

    Patterson Hood of the DBT's

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    earth
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    Quote Originally Posted by iscariot View Post
    My advice is:

    Post nekked pics of wife, then we can offer advice.
    ya, i don't have any of my wife, so i'll post a couple of yours when i get a moment.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
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    Bravo Delta.
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    Quote Originally Posted by strawjack View Post
    ya, i don't have any of my wife...
    Wanna buy some?
    Quote Originally Posted by Socialist View Post
    They have socalized healthcare up in canada. The whole country is 100% full of pot smoking pro-athlete alcoholics.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    earth
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    ^touche

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    The Padded Room
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    5,299
    I use wii fit yoga. easy compared to real yoga, but still nice. I also have a yoga app on my ipod I learn a few new positions from. No way I'm ever going to a real yoga class in Fanta Se. I hate all the yuppies here and that would cause me to have a apoplectic fit.
    .....Visit my website. .....

    "a yin without a yang"

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    The meth lab of Democracy.
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    478
    yoga is hard... at first. keep doing it, your body won't loosen up overnight.

    i've been practicing for 3 years, and it has literally saved my life. i had chronic back issues caused by too much sitting at my job. these days, i hardly have any back problems or pain. and, yoga has perfectly fit into my snowboarding/splitboarding; it's great for muscle endurance while touring, in the legs and low back, and additional flexibility prevents muscle fatigue. i'm well into my early 40's, and what i'm finding is that flexibility is way more important for my body than anything else.

    i had the same reservations about yoga as it sounds like you have. first, you have to approach it with the mindset that it might actually work. second, you have to get past the new agey trappings that ARE really common. my advice: hopefully you have a number of studios in your area to choose from. Most studios allow a first time class for free. Start going to classes and try classes with a bunch of different instructors. Find the instructor with the teaching style that best suits your personality, avoiding the new agey cheesiness. and don't get in over your head, start with classes for beginners. and sit in the back row (not to check the nice asses) but to watch how more experienced people move. some yoga classes and teachers can be really serious and stuffy, i don't like those classes either. as far as the soothing voices and music; yoga is an alignment between the mind and body, and the voices and music serve to facilitate that. again, find a class that works for you.

    good luck. yoga works, but it's not for everyone.
    Last edited by ricorides; 07-21-2011 at 06:01 PM.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
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    Nhampshire
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    7,767
    Key is a good instructor to correct your positioning until you can do it on your own, then do it at home more. Yoga classes are rad, so many hot girls in skimpy clothes.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
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    northern BC
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    31,002
    Quote Originally Posted by Tye 1on View Post
    One idea is to hit a few classes so you get some instruction on the basics. With any luck you'll find one that's fun and full of hotties. The results take time, but will always happen if you practice. I took my first class seven months ago, and average 3 classes/week, have hit four workshops, and one retreat. Yeah, i'm hooked, but i was lucky to have stumbled into an awesome studio...
    ^^ this, its fucking boring so put your sticky mat at the back so you can check the scenery & occupy your mind pondering the burning questions of life ...

    I wonder what the rest of her tatoo looks like ?

    Is she wearing a thong or what?

    At the local YMCA I tried beginner yoga but i found it slow and not dynamic enough but it did give me some basic moves,then I tried and much preffered FUSION which was offered at the local YMCA, it is a high energy combo of yoga/pilates and involes much more movement until you huff/puff/sweat

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Denver
    Posts
    8
    Yoga is all about the instructor. Find a studio and an instructor you click with. If you are not feeling the vibe go somewhere else. It always helps if the instructor is hot.

    It will take you about 6 months to a year to get the hang of the basics and to begin to feel what the instructor is talking about. Yoga is not easy or necessary relaxing. It's a tough workout. If it's easy, you are doing the pose wrong.

    If you have not been to a class the tape will be basically useless except for checking out the hot chicks. Toss it and take a class. It's will be worth the money if you want to learn yoga.

    I've been practicing yoga for almost 10 years and still generally suck at it when compared to flexible women. It does help with flexibility but my hips are still tight. My core is really strong though.

    Yoga class is fun and it's always nice to see the hottie in front of you, with the short shorts, in downward dog.

    Give glass a try.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    Ventura Highway in the Sunshine
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    Agreed...you need to find the right studio, class, instructor to make it worthwhile. It is going to take time to loosen up, but once you start to make progress it is really worth the time and effort.

    Unfortunately most classes/instructors are useless, and have no idea what yoga really is or how to teach it.

    I agree it is a constitutional right for Americans to be assholes...its just too bad that so many take the opportunity...
    iscariot

  13. #13
    screamingstarfish Guest
    yoga is way gay but kundalini is the shizz transforms your life and the workouts are more vigorous hatha can bore someone to tears stretch stretch stretch try kundalini and include the meditations cause they make you trip balls too

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    287
    Girls do yoga. Men stretch.
    Not doing my job right now

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
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    SE USA
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    3,421
    So I did some searches and this thread was helpful. I've been interested for a while, I'm very early 50s, Lifelong runner (20-25 miles/wk) ski tennis etc. Some mild lower back pain the last few years, and overall I've gotten extremely tight since my college track days. So I start a beginners/intro class in two weeks at what seems to be a fairly serious place (lots of retreats/spirtuality).

    Question-what do I bring/dress/wear etc. so as to be polite, considerate, un-jong etc. Also, doing this only for sports preformance, not really looking for "spirtuality." any/all suggestions/obervations etc. appreciated thanks!
    "Can't you see..."

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
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    Upstate
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    9,686
    Quote Originally Posted by MARSHALL TUCKER View Post
    So I did some searches and this thread was helpful. I've been interested for a while, I'm very early 50s, Lifelong runner (20-25 miles/wk) ski tennis etc. Some mild lower back pain the last few years, and overall I've gotten extremely tight since my college track days. So I start a beginners/intro class in two weeks at what seems to be a fairly serious place (lots of retreats/spirtuality).

    Question-what do I bring/dress/wear etc. so as to be polite, considerate, un-jong etc. Also, doing this only for sports preformance, not really looking for "spirtuality." any/all suggestions/obervations etc. appreciated thanks!
    un-jongs roll in the banana hammock ...

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
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    crown of the continent
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    i started with shorts and a plain t-shirt. If you want to take it up a notch a friend of mine started this men's yogawear company. You'll find a whole range in the degree that 'spirituality' is incorporated into the classes. Technically the asana [physical poses] part is just an element of yoga, you can have a yoga practice and not do a single downdog. But that's just one extreme. I've found that hot yoga classes tend to have the least philosophy. If they start talking about crap you don't care about, just go back to focusing on the breath. Counting the length of the inhale/exhale, try to stretch it out or pause at top/bottom [another yoga practice: pranayama] then just tune back in when they move on to what you find interesting...
    [one jong hint- kick your shoes off as soon as you walk in the studio, you'll see where they go...]
    Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
    And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
    It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
    and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.

    Patterson Hood of the DBT's

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Stuck in perpetual Meh
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    35,247
    Quote Originally Posted by Tye 1on View Post
    i started with shorts and a plain t-shirt. If you want to take it up a notch a friend of mine started this men's yogawear company.
    This is a strange looking man: http://www.mbody.com/The-Muscle-Hoodie-p/8501.htm

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Vinyl Valley
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    1,811
    Quote Originally Posted by MARSHALL TUCKER View Post
    Question-what do I bring/dress/wear etc. so as to be polite, considerate, un-jong etc. Also, doing this only for sports preformance, not really looking for "spirtuality." any/all suggestions/obervations etc. appreciated thanks!
    Do-

    1) keep your eyes open (hot women/skimpy clothing) listen to and watch the cues the instructor provides.

    2) wear comfortable clothing. I wear compression shorts (don't want my junk to scare/scar anyone) gym shorts and a sort-of-tight shirt (stays put, won't slide down(up?) during inversions)

    3) use the studio's demo/loaner mats to find something that works for you. I like a thinner mat which helps me to maintain balance when standing on one foot.

    4) bottle of water

    5) small towel to dry myself off and clean up any flop sweat from my mat, and area surrounding my mat, during class (I sweat a lot)

    6) it's not a competition, don't feel as though you need to get into the same version of the posture as the yogi next to you.

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    12,655
    My buddy's brewery in Boulder offers "Broga" classes. $15 bucks gets you a yoga class in the brewery and a beer. Last time I was there it was nice to drink beer and watch the ladies stretch. I can barely touch my shins.

    Here's a list of ten breweries that offer this service, a few are in the SE, maybe near you:
    http://www.yogajournal.com/slideshow...asses/#slide-0

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    I can still smell Poutine.
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    24,648
    yoga. pants.
    I see hydraulic turtles.

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Not in the PRB
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    32,927
    I didn't see this mentioned in here (just a few vague references) but there's more than just one type of yoga. Some types are slow, restorative, and much less of a workout. Some are harder poses, more muscles involved, but still static. And some involve constant movement. Generally the first type has more of the spiritual mind/body stuff. So go find what works for you if the first place doesn't.

    There's a core power yoga studio not far from my office, I may check that out soon.
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "everybody's got their hooks into you, fuck em....forge on motherfuckers, drag all those bitches across the goal line with you." - (not so) ill-advised strategy

  23. #23
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    Sep 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by shredgnar View Post
    My buddy's brewery in Boulder offers "Broga" classes. $15 bucks gets you a yoga class in the brewery and a beer. Last time I was there it was nice to drink beer and watch the ladies stretch. I can barely touch my shins.

    Here's a list of ten breweries that offer this service, a few are in the SE, maybe near you:
    http://www.yogajournal.com/slideshow...asses/#slide-0
    Hmm, Sanitas, home of the hipster lumbersexual.
    "fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
    "She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
    "everybody's got their hooks into you, fuck em....forge on motherfuckers, drag all those bitches across the goal line with you." - (not so) ill-advised strategy

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Maine Coast
    Posts
    4,713
    Watch your diet. If you have any known foods (nuts for me( that lead to flatulence yoga is sure to loosen it up. Don't want to be making eye contact and then let one rip as everyone is concentrating on their breathing.

  25. #25
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
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    12,655
    Quote Originally Posted by Danno View Post
    Hmm, Sanitas, home of the hipster lumbersexual.
    Isn't that an oxymoron? Yeah, they tend to draw a certain crowd, but what brewery (or any business for that matter) in Boulder doesn't?

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